The Important Stuff
Age: 24
Height: 5'2"
Highest Weight: 160 lbs.
Lowest Weight: 55 BEAUTIFUL pounds!
Current Weight: 120- ish, I think. I don't have a scale.
Goal Weight : 10 pounds lower than each new goal reached, leading to NOTHING-NESS
Fave food : Pizza is my guilty pleasure, I usually stick with fruit though. Fruit is GOOD ! ! !
Fave Drink : Coke, of the Diet variety.
Fave Exercise : Walking / Running, Dancing, Volleyball, and Figure Skating.
Thinspo : Evan Rachael Wood, one of my customers at work. (She's a total bitch, but SO thin and SOOO pretty)
Where do you slip up? On first dates with people. I don't want my first impression to be that of a freak.
When did it start? In January, 1997
Why did it start? Arts and Athletics. Enough said.
Does Anyone know? Yes. It's not really a secret anymore. Ask about it and I will tell. It's not a shameful thing anymore.
Do you want help? Sometimes. Last month HELL NO, but lately, Yes, Please!
Diet pills? Not since August, 2006 when I overdosed after Andrew left. (I wasn't trying to die this time, I just wanted control back through the caios.)
fave binge food: PIZZA... mmmm-mmmmmmmmmmm
Fave dieting food: Oranges, Lettuce.
How many cals do you consume a day?
What tips do you use to lose weight? Lots of water. Lots of Diet soda. Lots of gum, along with exercise.
What do you see when you look in the mirror? Failure.
Are you in a relationship? Ana ran him off, proving once again she is the only truthful being that will never leave.
If so, Do they pressure you to be thin? He didn't when he was there. He pressured Ana to leave.
Are you the fat or thin one out of your friends? I'm medium sized.
Are you depressed? Yes.
Do you self harm? I'm TRYING to be good.
Ever tried to commit suicide? Yes.
Ever been to a psychologist?? Oh yes.
Fave song? "Always" (Patsy Cline), "Crazy Bitch" (Buck Cherry), "I'll Be Seeing You" (Billie Holiday), and any good jive tune!
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!HOW much more weight do I want to lose???
I don't think I'll be happy until I reach ZERO.Sketches by my buddy JESS SOBEL, ( http://www.myspace.com/anorexic_girl ) By request from Jess, Please ask permission before using them!MY TATTOO:
"Summer Luvin"...DESIGNED BY CHAD...THANK YOU ! ! !
MY food pyramid... "IF YOU CAN CONTROL FOOD, YOU CAN KEEP ALL ORDER IN LIFE BECAUSE I AM THE CONTROLLER." -AnaMirror, mirror on the wall, whose the fatest one of allWhat you see is real, for the mirror never lies to us...
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FORCED FEEDING... THE KIT ! ! !Freddy REALLY does know your worst nightmares!!!
How to make a Summer
Ingredients:
5 parts mercy
3 parts humour
3 parts energy
Method:
Stir together in a glass tumbler with a salted rim. Serve with a slice of lustfulness and a pinch of salt. Yum!
Username:
Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.comYOUR ANOREXIC WHENyou could be sponsored as pro for cutting huge lettuce leaves into an edible size /
you stop having your period altogether /
you thrive on Metamucil /
you spend more time planning out your eating pattern than you do on your term paper /
you don't own a single food item that does not come in a fat-free, reduced cal butter /
you haven't "spread" margarine in months, since cal-free only comes in a spray /
you've ripped off your clothes compulsively for the sole purpose of getting the "accurate" weight 3 times a day (as a minimum here *grin*) /
you have to schedule times with different friends so your excuse of "I already ate" will fly /
caffeine...need I say more? /
you're on more "supplements" than Mark McGuire /
you plan strategic "eating" times so that people will think you are constantly stuffing your face /
you fill a carriage of food at the grocery store and put it all back, leaving wtih nothing. /
you spend 20 bucks on a meal and don't put any of it in your mouth. /
during trivial pursuit, you know all the food questions, like which has more calories, spinich or tomato juice? (spinich is right) /
you know the calorie content of almost ANYTHING /
you can write your own calorie counter book/website. /
you can never find a watch that stays on right. /
you automatically count calories as soon as you take a bite of something. ("One cracker is 12 calories, and this bite was about half. 6 calories so far...") /
going to a doctor means drinking a gallon of water and stashing all your change in your pockets and socks.. just in case they want to weigh you. /
you can't put your arms by your side because you have so much padding on /
bracelets that fit most people fall of your hand /
Everyone in the room is sweating in a tank top, and your freezing in a sweater /
You're suspicious of the amount of calories the package says (120 that can't be right, better add 10 more) /
You can remember the amount of calories you ate 5 days ago, but you can't remember where you put your car keys. /
You know the calorie content of more foods than a nutritionist /
You may have done some tendon-ligament damage to your knee (and also have a sprained/hairline fractured foot) but that doesn't stop you from doing your twice daily gym visits. /
when you wake up in the middle of the night (or a few times) and have to measure yourself several times to make sure you haven't gained anything before you can go back to sleep. /
when you have to do these measurements several times a day as well. /you spend more than an hour in a grocery store on more than one occasion /
your mom refuses to go grocery shopping with you /
you think 30 calories is alot for a drink /
you're mortally afraid of poptarts and whole milk /
when you think who needs friends with all these voices in your head /
when you wake up in a cold sweat because you dreamt that you ate something horrific and cant rest until you weigh yourself /
when you dont mind doing chores, because hey its all calory burning /
when you cower in the corner petrified because someone offered you the spoon and they cant understand because no-one has turned them down before, but no matter how hard you try - it will never touch your lips /
when you would rather have bamboo sticks shoved under your finger nails then feel fat... every single day of the week. /
When you think that 100 calories for one meal is to much /
When you leave your grocery cart in the middle of the aisle because it has to much food in it (a box of saltines, diet sobe, and a bag of wow potato chips) /
you can't sleep at night because your worried that rice cake is gonna make you fatter if you sleep /
when you buy a new mattress with an inch of padding, put a foam pad under your sheets, and still feel pain from the bones sticking out /
when you walk a mile each way too and from school, then go for a run, then bike another 3 miles, in the middle of december in the upper midwest (read: cold as hell)/
You drink enough water to flood a small country /
when you wake up scared as hell because you just had a very realistic dream about eating. /
your cabinet doors are starting to get a better work out then you are. any food yet. nope nothing I can eat. any food yet. how about now.... /
when you have perfected making the smallest amount of food look huge. /
who needs a museum? you'd get the vending machine downstairs /
your roommate gets pissed because you keep opening (and closing) the fridge door /
the pants you worn in seventh grade fall off /
you convince everyone around you that you're either vegan, vegetarian, lactose-intolerant, or diabetic. Bonus point if you convince them you are all of the above /
when you think a shower is just so much more appealing then a bath. /
when you intentionally park the car in the furtherest parking bay just so you can walk further. /
when you put your dumbbells-extra books in your ruksack so its heavier because you figure the more cals burned the better. /
when you have to talk to yourself to find out if you can eat, only to end up with an upgrade to only having a glass of water. /
Your diet pills are your daily supply of vitamins. /
You sleep with a pillow between your knees, under your butt, etc, etc, etc... /
You have more cookbooks than your local bookstore. /
You relish the feeling of hunger because you know that you are doing something right. /
you tell yourself that those "hunger pangs" are just a stomach ache from eating too much and hour-day-week ago. /
you go to the doctor for a weigh-in and blood work (being terrified of needles mind you!) and all you can think about is you weigh too much but not enough for doctors to like and you didn't have time to water-load and...(ect.) /
you get depressed if you can't go to your .. ED-forums. /
when you weigh yourself whenever you can hoping to see even a quarter of a pound dropped. /
when you've noticed that you've gained a pound and start exercising mad-style as soon as you get off the scale. /
when you're wearing thermal underwear in the summer. /
when you check vitamin bottles for calories. /
when your thighs don't touch together when you're walking.
when you see pictures of starving people and become jealous. /
when you find out toothpaste has 15 calories in it and dont brush your teeth for 4 days straight than remember you dont actually swallow the toothpaste /
when you worry if your laxatives have calories /
when you worry for days about the party youre gonna have in school and how you can avoid looking stupid by not eating, but cant eat because than youll get fat
when you over lap your fingers around your wrist numerous times a day /
smoke more because it burns calories /
you worry about kissing your boyfriend because you might consume some calories from anything he's had that day
if your butt hurts from sitting on the floor and your bones sticking out-- you think it's because all your FAT has put to much weight on it /
you worry about putting on flavored lip gloss because nothing that good and with flavor can have 0 calories /
uncontrollable shaking from not eating is a good sign that you've been "good" /
your mood depends on if you've eaten that day or not
you walk into a room and feel like everyone is looking at you and noticing that pound you gained /
you wake up in the middle of the night with a sudden urge to do your crunches because that dream you just had about food was way too real /
when you search for a parking space as far AWAY from the entrance as possible to burn more calories /
when youre convinced that just reading about the foods in a calorie book will make you fatter /
when you take your pulse every 10 minutes, just to check
when you think the calories from other peoples food will somehow become airborne, and youll inhale them, so you dont go out with anyone if theyre eating /
when you count the calories in anything anyone else is eating /
you watch food comercials obsessively, like some people watch horror movies /
when you seriously contemplate (even if only for a second) taking a razor and carving the fat off your body in a twisted version of at-home liposuction /
when you measure whether you're too heavy or not by if the stairs creak as you go up them (even though the house is over 100 years old) and determine you're a lardass everytime. /
when you fix food for someone and you wash you hands immediatly because your afraid that you'll absorb calories thru your skin by just touching it. /
when there is no safe food /
if you had no money whatsoever, you'd be willing to beg, borrow & steal to get your diet pills /
You make sure that work scehdules you during your family's mealtime so you won't have to make excuses. If you do eat with them...you must eat nothing else the entire day in preperation for a 'normal' meal. /
You practice weighing yourself at different angles just to make sure that you can't get a smaller weight, believe the heaviest. /
You spend 20 minutes at the grocery store debating rather or not the 15 calories extra for fat free cocoa with marshmallows is worth it. /
You avoid and eventually lose your friends because they might want to go out for pizza or something equally evil.
The meals you do eat are consumed in front of friends and/or family so they'll think you're eating...spend an excessive amount of time preparing a 60 calorie meal to make it seem like more. /
When you finally do eat something with a substantial amount of calories...it comes right back up or goes right through you. /Your worth is based on the number the scale flashes at you. /
You're making Christmas cookies for your family, and you're afraid that you'll absorb some calories through inhaling the dough, so you go outside and run 2 miles in freezing cold weather. /
Someone asks you if you want something to eat and you say, "No thanks, I ate yesterday," and don't realize that you said anything strange. /
when you have to stop midway through typing a post to rub some warmth back into you rfingers. /
when you sit-walk around the house rubbing the end of your numb nose /
You find yourself doing constant math in your head in order to break down caloric content of things like one sugar free hard candy (approx. 10) or one individual Cheese Nip (approx. 4) /
you know the calorie content of semen (15 cals per "serving" and it's pure protien)/
you look at urself in the mirror every 5 minutes to see if you "miraculously" have gained any weight and to count or admire your ribs......or any new found protruding bones
You practice weighing yourself at different angles just to make sure that you can't get a smaller weight, believe the heaviest /
you engage in a posting convo about how many calories are in semen /
when presented with the option of finally getting your social security card after months of putting it off or going to the store to buy fat free pringles (which are on sale), you get the pringles just so you can have something fat free to eat the whole day...
• ANA PSALM Strict is my diet. I must not want. It maketh me to lie down at night hungry. It leadeth me past the confectioners. It trieth my willpower. It leadeth me in the paths of alteration for my figure's sake. Yea, though I walk through the aisles of the pastry department, I will buy no sweet rolls for they are fattening. The cakes and the pies, they tempt me. Before me is a table set with green beans and lettuce. I filleth my stomach with liquids, My day's quota runneth over. Surely calorie and weight charts will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the fear of the scales forever
Distractions"Never ever cook or go grocery shopping when your on the verge of binging!"Go exercise, that way you'll be burning calories instead of consuming them, plus studies have shown that exercise may make some individuals less hungry. Clean, clean, clean! First of all ana's are known to be neat freaks, and cleaning can be so absorbing that you'll forget about food altogether. Do your homework or work ahead. Ana's are known to be intelligent perfectionists. Plus it only makes you smarter. Create a pro-ED journal or website. OR visit pro-ED websites. Beautify yourself. Give yourself a facial, manicure, etc. For ana's are known to be pretty, plus if your body is kept in good condition, people won't notice how frail your body really is.Safe FoodsApples Zuccini Grapes "Fruit2O" Tea Sugar-Free Jello Green beans Lettuce and Spinach Clementine Tangerines Diet Soda Healthy Choice Garden Vegetable soup I Can't Believe it's Not Butter SPRAY (AND ONLY THE SPRAY) Pam fat-free cooking spray Air-popped popcorn (with ButterBuds powder!) Fat-free Jello Pudding Celery Lima Beans Crystal Light Smart-Ones Fat-Free Fudge Pops Tomatoes Pickles Fat-Free Saltines Tuna fish (in spring water)Easy Purging FoodsIce Cream Yogurt Soup (especially creamy soup) Rice Bananas Brownie Batter (YUM) Chocolate Cream Pie Jell-O Melon, such as cantaloup, honeydew or watermelon Chocolate Twizzlers Oreos. Especially if they are dipped in milk or tea Cheese DoodlesFoods to AVOID PurgingCereal, especially cereal with crunchy, scratchy pieces like Mini-Wheats, Honey Bunches of Oats, etc. or anything that has slivers or flakes. Yes, this eliminates mostly all cereal, but Cheerios, Kix, or other round cereals are okay as long as you let them soak up enough milk Anything spicy!! Ouch. Anything "Noodly", such as spaghetti or noodle soup. For some reason it will inevitably come back in it's original long, stringy form. Imagine that half of it is almost in your mouth and the other half is still mostly in your stomach. Yeah, it's as gross as it sounds. Meat, which you shouldn't be eating anyway. Chips, pretzels, nuts... Think "Crunchy = Scratchy". This can seriously injure your esophogus. Be careful with anything red in color. As I discuss in The Classroom if you've eaten a bunch of tomato soup, and begin throwing up blood, you might assume that the blood is soup and not realize that you need to RUN to a hospital (it's a sign that you may be bleeding internally, and you could be dead in hours). Bread. Unless you drink outrageous amounts of water with it, it is very hard to get up. Coffee. Especially BLACK. Hurts like hell and tastes absolutely terrible! If you think you may purge within the next six hours, avoid coffee at all costs! If you absolutely need to purge, and you know there is coffee still in your stomach, try drinking some milk to neutralize it first.FattKatt... the last performance I attended!....THIS CAN'T END GOOD...