Alexander Downer - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Allow me the pleasure of introducing myself. Mortals refer to me as Alexander Downer, Member of the House of Representatives for the fine electorate of Mayo since 1984 and Minister for Foreign Affairs since 1996.Prior to that I was the Leader of Her Majesty's Loyal Opposition from 1994-1995 and did smashing good job. I was so successful I was no longer required in the position and determined that I should resign of my own free will. I do slightly regret resigning the leadership before the coalition swept to power in 1996 but console myself because I and the Australian people know I have made such a teriffic Foreign Minister no-one would have it any other way.There's a detailed biography of me at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexander_Downer But I don't like it because the picture they have makes me look chubby.
Myspace Contact Tables***SATIRE - This page does not purport to be that of Alexander Downer, nor does it express his views or those of the Federal Government or DFAT***

My Interests

I while away my spare time by dabbling in all the traditional pursuits. I enjoy foxhunting and shooting when I can find the time.The staff said I should put Foreign Affairs here to keep up appearances but I find it rather a bore to be truthful. As you can see here, I'm not really in the loop.

I'd like to meet:

I have such a busy schedule and don't really have time to meet the constituents or 'commoners' as Nicola (my charming wife) and I call them. Fortunately my noble blood and high office has allowed me to mingle with the people who matter.Rather than me list the few people I am still yet to encounter (due to the fact that I am so busy either at work or leisure, not any dislike on their part), I encourage those of you eager to be graced by my presence to file a request with the staff.Your chances of success will greatly increase if you include some small token such as wildflowers, perfume, home made preserves and smelling salts.My assent will depend on my awfully busy schedule, your class and the quality of your tribute.Don't be intimidated by the powerful company I keep. Drop me a line, I'm keen to meet young voters!

Music:

The wife and I often crank up the phonograph and indulge ourselves. Less often since the little have flown the nest though. I'll listen to anything informative apart from that trotskyite nonsense on Radio National.

Movies:

Ah the moving pictures! I remember when Lady Downer (Mama) took me along to my see the newsreels and the latest films. We arrived late because the Bently had a flat tyre or something (needless to say the mechanic got a right ticking off from Papa) but of course the proprietor offered to eject some of the riff raff to allow us in. I was quite taken with young Ms Garbo and the other starlets. Very elegant.

Television:

I never did care for the picture box.

Books:

I usually have the staff read to me.Deborah, My Secretary, always reads me the newspapers, drop her a line!

Heroes:

Papa & Mama. And of Course Grandpapa Sir Alec. Not to mention my Parliamentary leader John Howard, light of Australia. Sir Robert Gordon Menzies.

My Blog

POLAND HAS GONE TOO FAR

Foreign Minister Alexander Downer lauched a stinging attack on the Polish Government today, demanding it cease speculating on the outcome of the Australian election. "These Polls have gone far enough!...
Posted by Alexander Downer on Tue, 23 Oct 2007 12:11:00 PST

The Name Game

Alex, Alex Bo balex Banana fana fo falex fi fi mo malex Alex!
Posted by Alexander Downer on Sun, 10 Jun 2007 05:13:00 PST

If you read (or write for) the Courier Mail, go away. There's nothing for you here.

That's right. If the Courier Mail, bastion of all that is good and true, directed you here you should turn back now. Tell that nasty Mr Griffith to make his own mock pages, or at least ma...
Posted by Alexander Downer on Thu, 07 Jun 2007 03:28:00 PST

Moi on Australian Story

Fans of mine will have already recorded on their video machines the episodes of 'Australian Story' aired about me. http://www.abc.net.au/austory/content/2007/s1910357.htm Visit the site to lear...
Posted by Alexander Downer on Mon, 07 May 2007 06:07:00 PST

SPAM

It seems I have rather alot of spam, or so I am informed by some of my new myspace 'homies.' I did some research and discovered that spam is a manufactured, processed meat product. I was un...
Posted by Alexander Downer on Mon, 16 Apr 2007 03:29:00 PST

North, soon to be 'Not' Korea (haha a witty remark!)

Well, what are we to do about North Korea's provocative behaviour. And I don't mean provocative in the erotic stocking wearing sense. It was a very confusing twenty minutes in cabinet befo...
Posted by Alexander Downer on Mon, 16 Oct 2006 03:54:00 PST

Teach Deborah, my secretary, a lesson she won't soon forget

Apparently my secretary Deborah posted some pictures of yours truly. I went through and put some comments on and I reckon they're looking pretty fancy. I don't know what sort of shit she's trying to p...
Posted by Alexander Downer on Mon, 21 Aug 2006 04:05:00 PST

Super Uber Kool Australian Foreign Affairs Team or SUKAFAT

Being Foreign Minister is tough. There's so much shit going on in so many filthy backwaters. Phil Ruddock told me they're killing eachother in the Middle East...again! I mean as if that ma...
Posted by Alexander Downer on Fri, 18 Aug 2006 06:01:00 PST

Why am I here?

Citizens, As your Foreign Minister I am quite literally the face of our nation overseas. When people fr...
Posted by Alexander Downer on Sun, 13 Aug 2006 10:04:00 PST