(the real) Lenin profile picture

(the real) Lenin

All power to <i<bmy</i</b soviets!

About Me

My name is Vladimir Illyich Ulyanov, sometimes I also write and carry out revolutionary activities under the names Vladimir Illyich Lenin and Nicolai Lenin... see, sometimes I don't change my real first and middle name, but use the "Lenin" pseudonym instead of Ulyanov, other times I completely change it to "Nicolai Lenin" - I am so clever - you never know what you will get, much like a bourgeois box of chocolates! Oh yeah, and by the way, if you ever dare to mention that my father was a minor Czarist official I will send 19 divisions of crack Red Army troops lead personally by Felix Dzerzhinsky and the best former counter-revolutionary White generals which are now being forced to work for me to your house. Whenever I am portrayed by the masses of proletarians I am calm, collected, smooth, and even quite witty. I think these things are true, although sometimes my temper takes over and I rage a little... I guess because I am a Taurus, yes I know dialectical materialism, blah, blah, whatever ... . I've had a very stressful life, you know my older brother, Alexander Ulyanov, was executed by the Czar Alexander III, for conspiring to kill him! They didn't even do it, they just plotted! I mean, give me a break! Also, the task of being the sole genuine continuer of the ideas of Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels is a little stressful in itself... it is such a burden. If I let up from writing these essays, pamphlets, and books for one second Rosa Luxemburg and her meddling husband Karl Liebknect will have the Communists all over Europe in a state of Left-wing childishness, if not infancy! Then there are the Mensheviks (Julius...! why couldn't you have been a Bolshevik, my Martov...! ::swoon::), and the Socialist Revolutionaries... and my mentor, Plekhanov, even died supporting the Imperialist war!!!!!! Then the other day Bukharin had the hairbrained idea of invading the Germans instead of calling a seperate peace with them, yes, our beloved Germans who smuggled me back into the country, and gave us Bolsheviks millions of their gold to wage OUR revolution - he wants to invade them, and turn the imperialist war into a revolutionary one!!!! First, we promised the proletarians and peasants that we would end the war and give also bread and land to them (everyone owns the collectized land, right? Right!!!!?), but how are the Germans suppose to help us with building our military in the future if we declare war on them now!? I am so stressed, and just agitated all the time... some "Left" SR wrecker even shot me in the neck the other day... arrgh!! I really need to cool down and spend a few hours in Gorki... left to right: Felix Dzerzhinsky (head of my Cheka), me, and Stalin, showin' some love.Sometimes when my wife, Nadezhda Krupskaya, is not at the Kremlin chateau, I have French prostitutes pose in that empty chair there and I sketch them scantily clothed, and or naked. This time I am drawing one from memory.

My Interests

Dialectical Materialism. Historical Materialism. Marxist Economics. Debating with anyone who doesn't agree with what I say while claiming to be a member of the 3rd International, like those incredibly childish and infantile Dutch "Left" Communists! I also enjoy playing chess for hours upon hours at end. And of course, German gold! Straight from Kaiser Bill to the me ... I mean the workers and peasants of the RSFSR!!! Hey - what's with the look - they trust me! Who can you trust but Lenin in the RSFSR after all! But comrades, don't get me wrong, I also like to rock, Marx-style!!!!!

I'd like to meet:

Fellow members of the 3rd International. My International. Oh yes, and French prostitutes ... If you still must speak to me, and are not a French prostitute or member of the Comintern my International, that is, the Communist one then you will have to write me a letter. It may take some time to get to my desk and then me back to you as the amount of careerists and ex-czarist officials still permeating my Soviet apparatus is quite large. This is state-capitalist after all, with a thin veneer of socialism. Wreckahs.Regards, Vladimir Ulyanov (Lenin)

Music:

embed enableJavascript="false" allowscriptaccess="never" allownetworking="internal" name="RAOCXplayer" src="http://www.sitcomsonline.com/sounds/Leaveittobeaverinst rumental.wav" application/x-mplayer2" width="320" height="50" autostart="true"

Movies:

I tolerate that weird constructivist and futurist stuff in our theaters and stuff, but I really think they should make a movie out of that book... by that fine American John Reed... I think "Reds" would be a fine name for it. Oh they did that already? well then! Tatlin - we will build your monument to the 3rd International, my international, thus so we can have propaganda movies projected onto rain clouds, natural and artificially made 10 hours a day, 10 days a week.

Television:

I like to watch "pimp my ride" on MTV for the sociological value of it. It adequately displays the decadence of an imperialist society with so much wealth and waste on its hands it does not know what to do with it all! I also enjoy "Leave it to Beaver"; this was the golden age of American Imperialism, and the living standards portrayed in it are what I had always imagined Socialism to look like.

My Blog

First announcement to the All-myspace council on the freemarket in comments.

Comrades, for only a limited time there is a freemarket in comments in the RSFSR. As Bukharins says: "enrich yourselves", but in this case, enrich, me Vladdy-boy Lenin with comments ... please.
Posted by (the real) Lenin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST