Hootman profile picture

Hootman

I am here for Friends

About Me

Not much - did Superman ever have to go to the bathroom? If he did was that super too? I mean what happen to all that stuff - it's like indestructable - right ..so Papa Kent's septic got really bummed ....but maybe he was real cool about it and would go out in space to do his business .. so then are shooting stars just Superman taking a dump? That gives a new meaning to meteorites....ick ..I always thought they were strange looking.So ..what's up with werewolves ...like when they change into a wolf does the genitalia change as well or does it stay like a dog's ..if so then when the Wolfman went to the bathroom he'd pee on his chin. Maybe that's why he was disturbed all the time ..I'd be roaming the woods myself after that. Plus his diet is all bad - total Atkins - no roughage - no wonder the howling, the growling, the antisocial attitude....

My Interests

Maybe if I was a hunchback, it'd be cool. Ringing that bell, kipnapping Gypsy girls ..being pre-verbal ..pouring hot burning oil on French mobs ..yeah ..count me in ...I mean the dude had a good hair line too ..no need even to comb that bad boy. The tongue lolling out of the mouth was a little strange ..plus dragging the foot was a bit conspicuous ..other than that he was alright ...with maybe the hygiene being a bit off ..come to think of it -wasn't there a strange eye ...looking in the opposite direction of the other eye..right on . ..Quasimoto

I'd like to meet:

Professor Irwin Corey

Music:

Once I was a soldier And I fought on foreign sands for you Once I was a hunter And I brought home fresh meat for you Once I was a lover And I searched behind your eyes for you And soon there’ll be another To tell you I was just a lieAnd sometimes I wonder Just for a while Will you remember meAnd though you have forgotten All of our rubbish dreams I find myself searching Through the ashes of our ruins For the days when we smiled And the hours that ran wild With the magic of our eyes And the silence of our wordsAnd sometimes I wonder Just for a while Will you remember me- Tim Buckley

Movies:

Pretty Baby, Doctor Strangelove, Women in Love, Lolita - the one with James Mason, Eyes Wide Shut, ...all of Stanley Kubrik's films, Dead Calm - most of Nicole Kidman's films minus the comedy's. Woody Allen's early movies, The Crush, Blazing Saddles, The Producers, Kill Bill, 13, Broken Flowers, Blame it on Rio, Young Frankenstein.

Television:

Married with Children, The Simpson's, 24, The Medium, Amos 'n' Andy, Love that Bob, Doby Gillis, Seinfeld, Friends, SNL.

Books:

I went out to the hazel wood, Because a fire was in my head, And cut and peeled a hazel wand, And hooked a berry to a thread; And when white moths were on the wing, And moth-like stars were flickering out, I dropped the berry in a stream And caught a little silver trout. When I had laid it on the floor I went to blow the fire a-flame, But something rustled on the floor, And someone called me by my name: It had become a glimmering girl With apple blossom in her hair Who called me by my name and ran And faded through the brightening air. Though I am old with wandering Through hollow lands and hilly lands, I will find out where she has gone, And kiss her lips and take her hands; And walk among long dappled grass, And pluck till time and times are done, The silver apples of the moon, The golden apples of the sun.

Heroes:

Johnny Yuma was a rebel, he rode through the West.

My Blog

Klingsor

A passionate summer of swift moving life had begun.  The hot days, long as they were, flared up and away like burning streamers.  The brief sultry moonlit nights were followed by brief sultr...
Posted by Hootman on Fri, 15 Feb 2008 08:40:00 PST

Before Borat there was Ddb Lzmde Ouaejk

..> Dear  Kangaroo School Students and All of Americas,   Now that time is happened for returning of me to my homeland great big happy I say to you I am having been for here so long. ...
Posted by Hootman on Sat, 23 Dec 2006 02:19:00 PST

Homeroom 309 C. Estes Keffauver Memorial High School

Phil Addio, Honor Back, Claude Balls, Gay Barr, Seymour Butts, I.P. Daily, Ima Dork, Ben Over, Olga Fokyrcelf, Ben Gay, Ava Gina, Peter Guzzinia, Anita Hahnjob, Warren G. Hardon, Jack Hoff, Buster Hym...
Posted by Hootman on Sun, 03 Dec 2006 09:25:00 PST

Deep Thoughts - LOL- but then again.

"I don't know. We come into existence, we come into consciousness, we ride the train for awhile, not knowing what our destination is, and then we get off.  Not only do we not know what's outside ...
Posted by Hootman on Sat, 23 Sep 2006 09:54:00 PST

Theory of Insomnia

Dreams back up where the stream is blocked for whatever reason.  What comes is lucid but unbidden:  How that bartender looked at you thirty years ago when you ran out of money and begged for...
Posted by Hootman on Sun, 14 May 2006 11:35:00 PST

HOYT'S COLOGNE

HOYT'S COLOGNE In 1997 i interviewed a man named LaRue Marx about his career at the Lucky Heart Company, a cosmetics manufacturer in Memphis, Tennesee. Marx was employed there from 1935 through 1...
Posted by Hootman on Wed, 05 Apr 2006 09:11:00 PST

Survey

Name: Ness, Harry P. Birthdate: 5/16/1906 Birthplace: Somplace at a high altitude Current Location: Maryland Eye Color: Blue-Grey Hair Color: Red Height: 6'2" Weight: 210 Piercings: What...
Posted by Hootman on Mon, 27 Feb 2006 01:57:00 PST

Men and Women

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the...
Posted by Hootman on Wed, 11 Jan 2006 12:55:00 PST

Incident at Gamboa

Panama Canal Zone 1983    It was a typical sunny day on that long ago morning.  My car was new and red and glided effortlessly along a small but well constructed Canal Zone road.  ...
Posted by Hootman on Tue, 13 Dec 2005 11:00:00 PST