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John

I am here for Friends

About Me

A Light on the Town by John A. Wagner ..
AIM = john1486
MSN = [email protected]
I'm not cut out for college... but here I am.
Once I get in line at the supermarket I always get stuck in the line that slowly inches forward. I will then decide to go into another line, only to find this line is much slower, mainly because grandma up there is just now filling out her check. I look over at the line I used to be in and the guy who was right behind me is now checking out. This happens nine out of ten times.
Whenever I use a shopping cart in the supermarket, I always get stuck with the one that has the squeaky wheel; then people stare at me like I've got a problem or something.
I love catching people pick their noses in their cars, especially when they examine the specimen. It just makes my day.
I hate when people in these huge pickups start tailgating me in bad weather. Yeah, I realize you have like twenty wheel drive, just go around, buddy.
I've eaten cereal with orange juice once because I didn't have any milk... only once though.
So I'm at work and I'm putting some targets on the line. These targets come in the shape of almost any animal, but when I saw "African Leopard" on the box I was like, "Okay, this is just ridiculous. Who in Ashland, Ohio is planning on hunting an African leopard?"
Peace, like a River.

My Interests

Animals, bagpipes, black coffee, books, British comedies, clay, comic books, filming, God, Japanese weapons, model ships, movies, music, Nintendo, parks, photography, record albums, sculpting, shooting hoops, star-gazing, swings, tea, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, turntables, video games, writing

Music:

The Animals, Louis Armstrong, Bach, The Band, Syd Barrett, The Beach Boys, The Beatles, Beck, Beethoven, Chuck Berry, The Black Crowes, The Black Keys, Black Sabbath, Blondie, David Bowie, Jimmy Buffett, Johnny Cash, Eric Clapton, The Clash, Alice Cooper, The Coral, Cowboy Junkies, Cream, Creedence Clearwater Revival, The Cure, Bo Diddley, Willie Dixon, Donovan, The Doors, Nick Drake, Bob Dylan, The Fiery Furnaces, Fleetwood Mac, The Guess Who, Jimi Hendrix, Buddy Holly, John Lee Hooker, Howlin' Wolf, Iron Butterfly, Iron & Wine, Jackson 5, Jefferson Airplane, Jet, Elton John, Robert Johnson, Kings of Leon, Leadbelly, Led Zeppelin, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Manheim Steamroller, Marcy Playground, Roger Miller, Van Morrison, Mozart, Muddy Waters, Mussorgsky, New London Fire, Old Crow Medicine Show, Pearl Jam, Pink Floyd, Elvis Presley, The Pretenders, The Ramones, The Raveonettes, The Redwalls, Rilo Kiley, The Rolling Stones, Rush, Sleep Station, Bruce Springsteen, Steppenwolf, Steve Miller Band, Cat Stevens, The Strokes, Supertramp, The Supremes, The Temptations, Three Dog Night, T. Rex, Stevie Ray Vaughan, The Velvet Underground, Richard Wagner, The White Stripes, The Who, Wolfmother, The Yardbirds, Neil Young, The Zombies

Movies:

Almost Famous, American Splendor, Anchorman, Back to the Future Trilogy, Batman Begins, Best in Show, (Sean Connery) James Bond films, The Brave Little Toaster, A Christmas Carol, Corpse Bride, Disney movies, Dodgeball, Dumb and Dumber, Elf, Forrest Gump, Fried Green Tomatoes, Full Metal Jacket, Ghost World, High Fidelity, Home Alone, The Land Before Time, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, My Girl, Napoleon Dynamite, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Office Space, Planes, Trains, and Automobiles, A Scanner Darkly, Sixth Sense, Star Wars, Strange Brew, Super Troopers, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, This Is Spinal Tap, To Kill a Mockingbird, Tommy Boy, Waking Life, The Wall, Wayne's World, Who's Harry Crumb?, Winter Passing, The Wizard of Oz, X-Men, Zoolander

Television:

Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Are You Being Served?, Beast Wars Transformers, A Bit of Fry & Laurie, Family Guy, The Food Network, Good Times, Home Movies, Jeopardy!, Keeping Up Appearances, The Kids in the Hall, Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, Monty Python's Flying Circus, Mystery Science Theater 3000, The Office, Robot Chicken, Rocko's Modern Life, Space Ghost Coast to Coast, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job!, Tom Goes to the Mayor, The Twilight Zone, The Wonder Years

Books:

Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs by Judi Barrett

The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien

Edgar Allan Poe: Complete Tales and Poems

The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis

The Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

The Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy & Other Stories by Tim Burton

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll

Through the Looking-Glass by Lewis Carroll

Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

Just So Stories by Rudyard Kipling

High Fidelity by Nick Hornby

For One More Day by Mitch Albom

Songs of Innocence and of Experience by William Blake

The Marriage of Heaven and Hell by William Blake

A Monk's Alphabet by Jeremy Driscoll

Heroes:

Jesus

C.S. Lewis
Lewis Carroll
J.R.R. Tolkien
Charles Dickens
Edgar Allan Poe

Batman
Space Ghost

My Blog

Ive Got a New Blog! ZOMG!

So, yeah. I haven't written anything in here for quite some time and I thought I would do so. However, I don't have ANYTHING to say. Maybe some other day. But, an update...I have two weeks left of thi...
Posted by John on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 05:08:00 PST

Spring Oreos in Summer

I was rummaging through the pantry looking for some Oreos because I had a glass of milk and nothing to drink it with. I see this brand new bag of Oreos and I'm like, "Yes!!" I saw that they were the s...
Posted by John on Tue, 17 Jul 2007 01:40:00 PST

Hawk Eat Blackbird

I saw "thee" funniest thing "evar" today on my bike ride. You know how those obnoxious red-winged blackbirds always pick on crows? Now I'm not really sure why they do that. Maybe the crow is in t...
Posted by John on Fri, 06 Jul 2007 12:16:00 PST

Up In Smoke

What did I learn on Independence Day, 2007? One thing: Do not, I repeat, DO NOT wear polyester shirts while lighting firecrackers. Okay, sure, everyone knows polyester catches fire like none other, bu...
Posted by John on Fri, 06 Jul 2007 09:27:00 PST

More than meets the eye.

Oooooo. The moment we've all been waiting for has finally come. No, not Independence Day. Transformers on the big screen! I went to it yesterday with the gf and had myself a wonderful time. This movi...
Posted by John on Wed, 04 Jul 2007 10:10:00 PST

R.I.P. Captain America

So I just read some article on AOL News about the death of Cap'n America. 'Tis a sad day in this nation when America's finest superhero is killed by an assassin. But I guess it's hard to feel sad when...
Posted by John on Sun, 01 Jul 2007 01:37:00 PST

My Secret Admirer? No Thanks

So there's this stupid, pointless, moronic MySpace ad (of course, there always is) and it says "Find your secret admirer" or something of that nature. Anywho, it seems to be a very creepy-looking man ...
Posted by John on Fri, 29 Jun 2007 11:06:00 PST

Strange Occurrences

Today I was just told this by my Great Aunt: "I'm proud of you, Johnny. You're really working hard. I thought by now you would've been a lazy bum. That's good." Now I don't really know how to respond ...
Posted by John on Sun, 04 Feb 2007 11:52:00 PST

A Fortune in My Tea

I made myself some tea tonight and found something more than the tea bag. There was a little "fortune" attached to the string on the tea bag."'The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy t...
Posted by John on Sun, 04 Feb 2007 10:04:00 PST

The Misadventures of a College Student (A True Story)

The events that are about to unfold take place on a chilly December afternoon. It is not too cold, but it is not too warm either. It is December after all. Oh right, the story...I make the ten mile tr...
Posted by John on Sat, 09 Dec 2006 01:12:00 PST