Si-Digital @ Puregroove (FuRie)

I was a former child star of telly adverts, exploited by such capitalist machines as Tunnocks Caramel Wafers, John Smiths bookshop and the Scottish Campaign For Road Safety. Although that last one I did for charidee so the lack of proper payment doesn’t gripe me like the others. With the £25 cheques I got for them all, I set up a computer company called Microsoft and a country called Greece. Both are doing quite well and the latter was even awarded the Olympics last year. But we fucked it up right royally so I apologise for that.
I like keeping it real and keeping it unreal, but not at the same time else I’d be caught in a continual limbo paradigm that would force the world to implode. I also like cheese and tomato toasties, especially with granary bread. I’m not into dogging with Steve Mcfadden or Stan Collymore. I like football. I’m pretty good at it. Apart from playing in goals. And defending. Midfield I’m OK, apart from the defending bit. I also like drinking heavily and dancing onstage with Darlington punk poppers We Start Fires.
I work in a record shop. I also write for magazines. I don’t work for the government. Any more. But I can’t tell you about that. I like. Short. Sentences. But not. That short else. It gets a little clunky. To read. My favourite film is Annie Hall but I pretend it’s actually Bladerunner as people think if you love Woody Allen you’re into sleeping with your adopted daughter. Which isn’t cool at all. Especially when I did it the third time.
I’m off. Not off as in stale milk. Off as in going away. So there.