Ned profile picture

Ned

You don't want to play leap-frog with a unicorn.

About Me

Mildly lactose intolerant. I like stationery and The Muppets and I have a crippling fear of fish. Moustaches, Kamahl, crappy cars, funny names like "Gareth" and Degrassi Junior High make me happy. One day I'd like to own a grey cat named Adolf.
You Are Fozzie Bear
"Wocka! Wocka!"
You're the life of the party, and you love making people crack up.
If only your routine didn't always bomb!
You may find more groans than laughs, but always keep the jokes coming. The Muppet Personality Test . !

My Interests

Going to gigs, getting drunk like a fox, saying hello to Bluey, Rock Eisteddfod dancing, watching many many movies, reading comics, choreographing dances to 80's songs, riding Terry (my scooter), playing Gareth (my sweet, sweet casio keyboard. thanks Lawrence), collecting Kamahl records, drawing cartoons, and just having a chill :)

I'd like to meet:

Anyone who likes the same crap that I do. If iced vovos and beige volvos do it for you, you're pretty rad in my book.

Music:

TOP 10: PRINCE, The Dandy Warhols, Sublime, The White Stripes, Foo Fighters, Tori Amos, Beck, Beastie Boys, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Smashing Pumpkins.Plus other stuff and things...Jeff Buckley, The Saints, Tom Waits, Supergrass, Billie Holiday, Lemon Jelly, Nina Simone, Bjork, Unwritten Law, The Strokes, Kings of Leon, Jane's Addiction, Blur, Nirvana, Sex Pistols, Earthquake In Osaka, Whitley, My Big Friend, The Legs, Jimmy Cliff, Fiona Apple, The Beatles, Electric Mayhem (band from The Muppets), Melanie, Nick Cave, You Am I, The B52's, Cat Stevens, Blind Melon, Joy Division, Air, The Whitlams, Indigo Girls, Nick Drake, Sufjan Stevens, The Darkness, Pinky Beecroft and The White Russians, John Farnham (sadly, not joking), Tracy Chapman, Robbie Williams, Guns "N" Roses, Tom Jones, Paul Kelly, The Greenhornes, G Love and Special Sauce, Butthole Surfers, Lou Reed, Bob Marley, The Cure, No Doubt, Ash, Jamiroquai, New Order, Frank Sinatra, Machine Gun Fellatio, Manu Chao, Custard, Frenzal Rhomb, The Streets, Hilltop Hoods, Dan Sultan, Bob Dylan, Meatloaf, Carole King, The Mountain Goats, Ruby Rose, Jose Gonzalez, Paul Simon, Powderfinger, Iggy Pop, Millencolin, Downsyde, Janis Joplin, Barry White, Dave McCormack, NOFX, Otis Redding, Pegz, Kaiser Chiefs, Cake, Cameron Bruce, Alice Cooper, RATM, The Ribbon Device, The Inches, The Basics, The Smallgoods, most bands that start with "the" actually. With the exception of The Police. My word, Sting is a tool.

Movies:

The Muppet Movie, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Spirited Away, Amelie, Sexy Beast, Dig, Napoleon Dynamite, The Life Aquatic, I Heart Huckabees, Encino Man, Son In Law, (Pauly Shore. You know you want to...) Ghostbusters, RAD, Scarface, The Royal Tenenbaums, Frida, The Piano, The Breakfast Club, Stealing Beauty, Coming Home, Look Who's Talking, The Lost Boys, Pretty in Pink, Three Men And A Little Lady, Fargo, Braveheart (although I'm not sure why), Batman Returns, The Crow, Dancer In The Dark, Uncle Buck, and 28 Days Later. Laser Mission is by far and away the greatest piece of cinema I've ever had the pleasure of seeing.

Television:

Degrassi Junior High, Black Books, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Seinfeld, Big Love, Neighbours, Family Guy, Heartbreak High (1994-98), Empty Nest, Neon Genesis Evangelion, Happy Days, Northern Exposure, Spaced, Deadwood, Spicks and Specks, Big Train, The Chaser, Arrested Development, The Office, Greatest American Hero, M*A*S*H, The Sopranos, The Mighty Boosh, Ren and Stimpy, Beavis and Butt-head, and Antiques Roadshow.

Books:

Anything by John Steinbeck. Especially "Of Mice and Men" and "To a God Unknown". "One flew over the cuckoo's nest" by Ken Kesey is awesome, I've read it a million times. I also really dig "The Little Prince" by Antoine De Saint Exupery.

Heroes:

Mother dearest, Jim Henson, Ricky Gervais, and the one and only PRINCE.

My Blog

Heading south for the summer OR Ned succumbs to peer pressure.

Well folks, it's been swell but I'm going home to ye olde Melbourne town in November. I miss the city that calls it a slab rather than a carton, Mick showing me cool shit on his decks, nights spe...
Posted by Ned on Fri, 03 Aug 2007 05:06:00 PST

I got me a jobby!! (part 2)

Selling meat in a market. Oh yes. Just think of all the bacon...
Posted by Ned on Wed, 18 Jul 2007 10:21:00 PST

I got me a jobby!!

Yip yip! It only took 6 and a half months, but yes finally I am employed. It's a great job too. I get to be one of those horrendous people that try and make you switch to mastercard or some shit or d...
Posted by Ned on Thu, 28 Jun 2007 12:00:00 PST

Nad-pumping list number 2.

Cups of tea (at least 6 a day), "No rain" by Blind Melon, homemade pizzas, jackets with sleeves that are too short, Wheels from Degrassi Junior High, bacon and eggs everyday, sweet moustache...
Posted by Ned on Sat, 23 Jun 2007 11:56:00 PST

The greatest film in cinema history

  I can say with all seriousness that this has got to be the best film I've ever seen. The plot is both believable and makes perfect sense. The acting is nothing short of wonderfu...
Posted by Ned on Wed, 04 Apr 2007 11:35:00 PST

Quite perplexing...

There are certain things in this wacky, wacky world we live in that I just don't quite get. For example- * Why does a vacuum cleaner have a suction control function? Are there certain times when you d...
Posted by Ned on Mon, 29 Jan 2007 03:40:00 PST

Things I currently like. They'd pump my nads if I had any.

Semi-mediocre pop rock bands. Avocado on toast. Mangoes fresh from the tree motherfuckazzz :) . The colours red and blue together. Songs that are keyboard or synth driven. Getting nicely toasted with ...
Posted by Ned on Sat, 20 Jan 2007 07:09:00 PST

Where have all the cowboys gone?

I was reminising with a fellow "80's comedy" enthusiast and it made me wonder if we'll ever have another comedy great such as John Candy. Yes, I'll admit that towards the end he had some regretab...
Posted by Ned on Tue, 09 Jan 2007 06:34:00 PST

One thing I must do before I die.

  Rebecca Romijn you are a damn FOOL to let him go. Ohhhh he is delicious. He was the ONLY reason to watch Full House. The hair gell, the smirk, the leather vests.....oh my. I know it's a bit on...
Posted by Ned on Fri, 22 Dec 2006 10:40:00 PST

Cheap mangoes and hookers OR Brisbane so far...

I've been here for a few weeks now and so far I'm loving it. I still don't feel like I really live here yet, but I think that'll change when I get a job. I've been out a few times and went to a kick a...
Posted by Ned on Thu, 21 Dec 2006 09:24:00 PST