Je ne vais jamais t'oubliernever will i forget the beauty
of the very day
those sad and caring dark brown eyes
that you have got my dear friend.the wind breaks into my room,
disturbing the silence of the night
i see myself lost and confused
not knowing whether to live or die.i am to leave all that i've got behind
my back and start again
but now i'll be in a strange, cold
world where no one understands a word.i look out of my window and see the late nights rainbow.
i realize that even stars can't
help me more than you have done.and now i know you are the one
your eyes prove all the words as one.it's time to go,
"don't say goodbye,"..."i'm coming back i promise you"
you have my love and all my heart
i'll say au revoir and fall apart.
I'd like to meet:
God. the cast of will and grace, sex and the city and the girls next door because i love them. paris hilton, lindsey lohan, and britney spears...to hit them upside the head. really what the hell are they doing? and well...hugh hefner so i can become a playmate!
Music:
disco!TRUST"do you trust me?" the answer is no.
you've let me down and hurt me and now you must go.
my heart has been wrung and broken which is just too much to bear.
it's not that i hate you, it's more a general animosity toward the whole species of men.
why is is they can hurt you so much even when they say that they care?
i laugh at the idea of love, it seems like such a lie.
you always have a way of wounding the ones you love,
the pain and torture that follows the arrow of love hurts more than just saying goodbye.
why must i be apart of this culture of despair?
i'd rather be all alone, this world just isn't fair.
trust- you say. what on earth would make you think this was in the nature of men?
you burned me once only a fool would let you do it again.
i let you in far too close to my heart
so the walls must go up and from me you depart.
if alone is where i want to be then why do you continue to poke and bother me?
Movies:
the xxx rated ones!~Dead Inside~we walk around the world like zombies, everything bounces off us like we're a wall.
doing all we are told to do out of fear or perhaps we want people to think we are doing just fine, we really aren't doing well at all.
standing in a room full of people yet completely alone. like you're standing behind a glass wall but no one see you.
you begin to wonder if you love anything and sadly discover you don't.
some say that's not possible but they would understand if only they had a clue.
then in an instant it hits you and by the grace of God something has moved inside.
like your heart began beating again, you are fresh and new.
this feeling releases you from the desire to run away and hide.
slowly though the days pass by and the joy begins to fade away.
you are overcome with the grief and sorrow.
the tears roll down your cheeks and your heartaches from all the pain but don't worry there is always a tomorrow.~ETERNAL REST~soft thuds, like a knock on the door.
open it, damn it, open it!
before it stops and silence haunts.
knock back, scream, cry, anything!
why do you keep this silent vigil?
it's okay, just relax
you wanted this-remember?
thought it threw a million times
and thought this was best.
no blood, or wounds or silly knife.
no ropes or guns or gas.
just one long sleep that never ends...
until the drugs wore off.
numbness of body, but the mind awoke
the wooden walls caved in,
under the weight of so much more than dirt.
the world that laid on your shoulders
finally suffocated you at night.
leaving only darkness and hallow gasps of air.
Television:
barney, elmo, er, csi, will and grace, the housewifes of orange country, umm and all that crap.
SECRET DESIREtotally surrounded by people all day
but alone at night in bed
your mind continues to race as you try to sleep
but nothing can silence the memories in your head
the contact you long for never comes
unless you kill your conscience that's so strong
hungry for love no matter the source
after a few drinks you won't think it's all that wrong
your body shrinks from the touch on your skin
yet this is what you think you deserve
your heart locked away in a sealed tin
there's nothing left to preserve
you have a secret desire that you'll never tell
but everyone can see your starving for love
trapped in your self-imposed hell
all you have to do is keep your eyes and heart focused
on what's above.
Books:
almost anything: picoult by far is the best, poe, dumas, bronte, austin, green and well the list goes on and on. i love books!
Heroes:
~Life~this pit of darkness swallows you whole,
softly treading over the ashy coal
the deathly silence is soon disturbed by a scream
a plead for help from someone unseen
tears of blood from your wounded heart
pierced to the core by a metal dart
trapped in this endless cycle of hate
condemed by my self-imposed fate
shallow breathes escape from my lungs of ice
if only i had another chance to roll the dice
helpless and alone, tormented by my mind
i look inside and emptiness is all i find
the scream is truly a scream of fear
from your own mouth it appears
there must be more to this hell
if anyone knows please tell
smoke suffocates your lungs as you gasp
dragged farther down the well till you collapse
the cold floor brings relief
knowing you cannot fall farther beneath.
