I have recently accepted a position as claims adjustor at the National Zombie-American Insurance Board. We deal with insurance claims from zombies that have to do with loss of limb or limb usability due to being in a zombie-like state. Zombies that were in the act of attempting to eat another living being, unless that being is an escaped convict, who lose limb or limb usage due to self defense on the part of the attacked are not eligible for benefits. However a great many zombie limbs are lost due to crazed drivers hitting them with their cars. These zombies are eligible for insurance benefits.
I have an army of simian freedom fighters in my basement. They smell the place up. I wash them all with hypo-allergenic shampoos. They love it, and for a day, everything smells like flowers.
I've developed an unhealthy obsession with shoe purchasing. Ask me about shoes.
I'm also going to be getting my first tattoo soon, on my right calf. It will be honoring the greatest day of the year, All Hallows. My newest obsession is finding spots in the home to build secret bookshelves and rotating fireplaces. Get ready and get stoked.
AIM- Use The Fire Rod
