A way out west there was a fella, fella I want to tell you about, fella by the name of Jeff Lebowski.At least, that was the handle his lovin' parents gave him, but he never had much use for it himself. This Lebowski, he called himself the Dude.Now, Dude, that's a name no one would self-apply where I come from. But then, there was a lot about the Dude that didn't make a whole lot of sense to me. And a lot about where he lived, like- wise. But then again, maybe that's why I found the place s'durned innarestin'. Now this story I'm about to unfold took place back in the early nineties-- just about the time of our conflict with Sad'm and the Eye-rackies. I only mention it 'cause some- times there's a man -- I won't say a hee-ro, 'cause what's a hee-ro? -- but sometimes there's a man. And I'm talkin' about the Dude here -- sometimes there's a man who, wal, he's the man for his time'n place, he fits right in there--and that's the Dude, in Los Angeles. And even if he's a lazy man, and the Dude was certainly that--quite possibly the laziest in Los Angeles County. ...which would place him high in the runnin' for laziest worldwide-- but sometimes there's a man. . . sometimes there's a man. Wal, I lost m'train of thought here. But--aw hell, I done innerduced him enough.
