Presented in 3B- Three Beers and it looks ok, eh. Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." ..I'm a lazy chimp.................... Mere months ago i was your typical cigarette smoking, fun loving chimp. Then one day someone sat me down at the computer... You see, i was just like any other chimp in the facility. Throwing poop, stuffing shaped blocks into the apropriate holes, learning the rudiments of american sign language. The usual stuff that chimps do. One day one of the scientists removed the electrodes from my head, and i got free. All i wanted was a banana, and mabye a smoke. I pounded on the computer keyboard with one of my thumbed feet, and they were amazed at how fast i was able to steal a copy of the Rolling Stones' Let it bleed. (it had been a while, and i really wanted to hear "Monkey Man.") The people in the white coats then gave me a few brief tutorials on how to do this and that, but being as intelligent as i am, i pretty much mastered the interweb on my own terms. They rewarded me with beer every time i did something right. Naturally it got to the point where i was (And still am) drunk all the time. I mean, I was downloading episodes of Lancelot Link and the Chimp Channel (my stories) within a matter of weeks... How SMART is THAT!?!? Compared to other chimpanzees i know, i'm a regular Einstein! After that, i was a self proclaimed webernet wizard... Super intelligence does have its drawbacks though. I mean, it's fun to swing around on tire swings and pound my chest like a wild savage, but lets face it a chimp as smart as me needs more intelectual stimulation than that... And i found it all right here on the MySpace. Animals, Machines, Fart jokes, Robots, Boobie pictures, Fruits and Vegtables, Dead Rock Stars, Random objects... I like it here........................................................ ............................................................ ......................................Mr.X