NOW...laughter or sadness is far away.Enjoying the silent empty mind in gentle loving awareness,no more need for excitement,no more chasing after women,or saving the world,or seeking enlightenment.Whatever comes,comes,seen in the distance,heard in the echoes.
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THEN...the con artist (consciousness)formerly known as swami anand terry,swami anand banana fruitcake,swami anand banana nut panic-ache,swami bananas (deceased)Zen Mistress........terry the toilet,fake swami
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..........................................traveller on the path to nowhere.There is nothing to seek,anyway,enjoying the view as I travel,without moving,anywhere,everywhere,nowhere..........................
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Y MEMORIES...As I kept having to tell this,here is....Some life story..........In my twenties involved in humanitarian/political actions:medical supplies and food to rebel held areas during the war of independence of Bangladesh,help for the homeless In Brixton,(london),squatting,local food cooperative/environmental etc.So successfull,but I felt there was something missing,and ,at age thirty,I posed the question,"Is it religion ?"Life immediately offered me choices.The first came in the form of a young french girl,with small child,who I fell for-she was a follower of Guru Maharaji.I went to one of their meetings,but it was too wishy washy for me,so I gave her some money and she followed her guru to america,and I never saw her again.The next invitation came through two white rhodesian brothers,who I was sheltering,refugees from the military draft,who were going to a big happenning for followers of Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh (Osho),but my mind said "CULT" and I didn't go.So "Life" had to use other bait ! I got a letter from india from an australian girl I had also had the hots for-she had become a disciple of this guy Rajneesh,and it was such a joy-filled letter,I wanted to know more.Within hours,I met an orange clothed sannyasin who came into the food coop and we spoke.A little later she came back with one of oshos books.I read a few pages and knew I had to go and be with him.(Though of course,at the subconscious level,what I wanted was to get together with the girl!)Everything fell into place-there was someone to take over my responsiblities running the charity,and no problems.A week later,I got off a plane in Bombay,with money in my pocket and a passport,but with absolutely no luggage,no innoculations,nothing.Customs couldn't believe it.Shared taxi,five hour journey to Poona,and almost the first person I met,from the thousands of westerners there,as I entered the ashram,was the girl !
....................I threw myself into the activities of the ashram,I who had never been,before, or after,a follower,accepted all the "Therapy" groups I was offered,and became a disciple (sannyasin).After being thrown out of "encounter" group,twice,I shaved off my glorious long hair and beard,to look for the beast,the ugliness underneath,which one groupleader said I had to find.But I could not,and collapsed into laughter and began to enjoy the absurdity.I was thrown out of the encounter group for "not doing anything",precisely in the moment when I was feeling the first real emotion of anger about to explode ! Curious ! As I had been sincerely trying to "Do" things,I came to the conclusion that I should STOP DOING THINGS,so entered into the state of NON-DOING ! or LET GO,NON-BEING,and to this end I stopped doing anything unless I got a sign/push from existence-and I allowed the money to run out,so that I could no longer control the situation through its possession.The amazing thing was that existence completely took care of all my needs.I had somewhere to sleep-the owner of the sugar-cane field on which I lived in a bamboo hut,stopped asking for rent,when he decided I was a holy man (I shouted at him!)Food was always offered,by strangers,without being asked,beggars shared their food with me,local tradesmen gave me un-asked for credit,which I settled whenever someone gave money.Whenever there was money left in my pocket,I would give it all to the first person who asked.-LIVING IN THE MOMENT.-And, "Life" brought me lessons to learn,and an "unofficial" job,-looking after the people who were too strange to be let in,or back in to the ashram.People who,later,I found to be described as "mastas"-the divinely mad,by the late enlightened master Meher Baba...typically I would find myself drawn to a place where someone was freaking out,or a riot taking place,and I would find myself calming down the situation just by my presence,without using any words-these were my first experiences of NO-MIND,existence acting through me,making "subliminal" hand gestures which worked on the subconscious level,to calm someone down,and move them away from the situation,sometimes I would move them away from the ashram,and occasionally use words to comfort and encourage them to let go.Other times in this state of no-mind I felt to take people who were banned from the ashram,inside the ashram,so that they could come closer to Osho and commune with his presence-dropping into no-mind,it was if I did not exist,the ashram guards,who had photos of people not allowed inside,would just not notice them,when I escorted them inside,to sit in silence as close as we could to the house where osho lived.....And then there were experiences of such at-one-ment......When the monsoon rains came after six months,my bamboo hut was literally washed away by the rains,and I found myself lying on a wall,waiting for sleep to come.There were dark clouds,heavy with rain,all around me,but above was a circle of clear,starry sky,which remained all night,like magic,and when I was feeling cold,a puppy came up to me,and climbed up on my stomach,and kept me company,and warm until dawn,when suddenly he gave a yelp as if someone was pulling him away from me with an invisible lead.he jumped off me and ran away !Never saw him again either!....so many weird and wonderfull experiences that I have kept to myself-you may think I'm making this up.or crazy-thats your choice.But theres more to "life" than meets the eye,unless you slow down enough to start seeing them........................................................
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further episodes of my story,check out the blog "SHARING,theENDLESS.PATHLESS PATH",where you see,my story is your story,is our story,is the story of life !
Myspace.com Blogs - Compassion - Osho MySpace Blog
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.... Beautiful lies from osho (I love you)The closest any word can come to truth:awareness
