Red - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I'm a dynamic, fully-realized human being. I am a great ape, no matter how you gussy me up. I'm androgynous because I don't know how to properly groom myself. I don't eat anything that can ride a bicycle. I do not believe the things I read in Science Fiction novels, despite the obvious risks involved. I don't know art, but I do know smut. I am left-handed and I am willing to die for it. I refer to returning library books as, "getting that monkey off my back." I have red hair and should be feared because of it. I am offended by the presence of straight people in gay bars. I've never fought to the death. I've never even fought to the mild injury. When attacked, I respond by upping the ante of the dispute. I am not afraid to throw Ranch dressing to prove a point. I will beat you at Risk because I want it more. I am no longer down with OPP. I'm a terrible student because I have yet to meet someone that knows something I don't. I do not believe in grammar.I do believe in CAPITAL PUNishment. I've got a million of 'em. Science will never explain it. You're going to be really glad you know me someday. I'm going to be famous. I'm going to be rich. I'm taking you to the top with me, so hang on.

My Interests

Robots, North Carolina, Mulberry Bushes, Street Theatre, Dumpster Diving, Funnel Cakes, Stand-Up Comedy, Drinking, Zines, Zinesters, Surrealism, Traveling, Southern Radicalism, Taking the Low Road, Banjos, Fiddles, Guitars, Pizza, Queers, Weirdos, Shoplifting, Fire Spinning, Sunsets, Mountains, Tennessee, Fruit Punch, Seeing Stars in the City, Dreams, Dreamers, Metaphors, Divining Rods, Alchemy, Video Game Soundtracks, Construction Sites, Late Night Jogging, Dogs, Train Rides, Snack Cars, In Flight Movies, Salad Dressings, Chocolate Chip Cookies, Break Beats, Roasted Vegetables, Liberation, Marshmallows, Tortillas, Natural Hair Colors, Calories, Bicycles, Flash Fiction, Blacksmithing, Honey Suckles, Liver diseases, psuedo-religion, Epics of any medium, Cold Fusion, Bruised Ribs, Open Heart Anything, Smokin' MCs, Library computers, Graphic Comic Books, Tragic Stories that Involve Angels, Gossip & Shit Talking, Hummus

I'd like to meet:

[Queer] People Who Want to Change the God-Damn World
Henry Rollins-y Types Need Not Apply.

Books:

I am not ashamed to say that I did not finish Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintance.

Heroes:

So powerful. So Gay.

My Blog

Im Not Tryin to Be a TOTAL Hater, but...

... Here is a short list of terms that I really don't want to hear for, like, a month: Men. Man. Boy. Boyfriend. Bro. Brotha. Bro-dog. Dude. Gay (men). Husband. Wife. Straight. Married. Preg...
Posted by Red on Mon, 02 Jun 2008 08:37:00 PST

Because I Need This

1. Sometimes when you're laying down, do you feel like you're floating?No, I feel like I'm laying down. Have you ever stumbled in a dream though? That's weird, huh?2. Do you feel there is an overuse o...
Posted by Red on Thu, 21 Feb 2008 09:51:00 PST

Allergies are the New I-Pods

A co-worker recently asked me if there were any cucumbers in our soup, claiming that he was terribly allergic and would break out in hives if he were to accidentally consume some. I was taken aback. F...
Posted by Red on Wed, 23 Jan 2008 08:32:00 PST

The Internet Knows Something I Don’t

I posted this on my MC Redorix page a while ago, but it strikes true again today: Have you ever really paid attention to your 'sponsored links'? They're on your homepages, and if you tend to ignore th...
Posted by Red on Sat, 01 Sep 2007 07:56:00 PST

I don’t care if I’m being dramatic

So I'm not sure how much time I have. Inspiration just hit me, but I have to go to work in an hour. We'll see what I can churn out, because I don't feel like waiting to properly articulate what I'm fe...
Posted by Red on Sat, 18 Aug 2007 10:49:00 PST

I’ll Stop Calling Second Wave Feminists Uppity Broads...

... When they stop calling me a 'Male-to-Constructed Female'.
Posted by Red on Tue, 14 Aug 2007 02:23:00 PST

The Famous Punk Planet Article

Gender Fucking the Media By Red Durkin Mainstream journalism is, if anything, in the entertainment business. Its primary concern is to get as many people as it can to watch, read, and listen to its pr...
Posted by Red on Thu, 02 Aug 2007 01:32:00 PST

A constructive follow-up to my previous whining.

Hey everybody, So at some point between the check-out line in Kroger and my house I lost my wallet on Tuesday night. I've looked everywhere, I've retraced my steps, and I've hounded Kroger about it. N...
Posted by Red on Thu, 31 May 2007 09:38:00 PST

I can not shout. This is a Library. This is me shouting.

I have no wallet. Oh, sure, I HAD a wallet. But nothing is to be taken for granted, and now I have no wallet. I have no ID. I have no social security card. I have no birth certificate. I have no job. ...
Posted by Red on Thu, 31 May 2007 04:10:00 PST

How One Article Made Me Hate Men

****** This is REALLY, REALLY fucked up shit. It Involves discussion of rape and the idea of false accusations there of. Please Know that it could be VERY triggering. I currently want to vomit...
Posted by Red on Fri, 20 Apr 2007 12:03:00 PST