karmademon

I'm just a person, with a beautifull family. I normally have an arsenal of words and rants to follow, but Ive been trying to remain reserved. Right now, nothing more in my life could make me happier. My job has taken a turn for the better, my friends are as great as ever. Ive met an amazing musician and friend named Jen, from Stoics Handicap (www.stoicshandicap.com), and I have the pleasure and honor with helping her with her passions of the music industry. And I must say, I dream of what all I can do to help her, her music is simply undefined, as is her heartfelt, poetic lyrics. But most importantly, my family has made me a complete man. I love my wife, even though she is technically not my wife yet, I just cannot get enough of her. I never thought we would be so happy. The reason; we were perfectly, happily in love with all rough waters behind us... and then something amazing happend. Almost as if God himself said "Oh, you think this is what perfect bliss is? Let me show you what perfect happiness is". And then he did. Tricia became pregnant. And for 8 months that I knew of, I talked to my son through his mothers stomach. I spent hours every night holding her, rubbing her, and placing my hand on her stomach, telling him all about the world he will soon be part of. And in a flash, it happend; I experienced life being born. I looked at Tricia, I looked at my son, and right then I knew I was wrong for ever doubting beauty in this world. Watching my son, Christian Hunter Stanley grow over the past few months has simply been a rollercoaster of new emotions. Every little tick and movement Ive taken for granted these past 30 years are all new to me, for I vicariously live and see life through his eyes. He smiles and time stops for me. I only thought that happend when I made Tricia smile. When I look into her eyes, and start to melt, I look into his eyes, and all the sorrow of a million broken promises washes right off of me. They have made me the luckiest man in the world and I never would have thought I would be here, now, with them, with no remorse or doubts. I just wish I could give him the world as he sees it and not as it truly is. As said before, my job is decent, but I attend not for the labor, but for the chance to buy him a newer, more shinier world.... one he can share with his mother. Because lets face it, I never would have made it if I hadnt had love in my life. I had it in the past with my mother, grandparents, and several of my ex girlfriends. But that love was just a learners class to what my full potential in the art could be. And it is an art. I paint a picture for Tricia every day, I use the green in her eyes for representation of growth, I use the red in her hair for the warmth that she has given me. I use our lives together as a canvas that depicts why our race never deminished and died out. I know what that driving force is now, Ive seen god on earth, and its called family. And for those who cannot see my canvas, I feel pain in my heart for those who do not have it. But I can only create my art because of the muse in my life. She inspires me and makes me feel whole.
Dont get me wrong, tragedy still creates the poet... I know this. But I have had rough waters, as said before. But I never want to go back. I have enough inspiration with my wife and son to paint the skys a brighter shade of blue. I have enough love in my heart to undo all the black in this world, and if given the chance to do so, I would paint it red... the color of my lovers hair... the color of our sons blood; which genetically carries both mine and Patricias genetic code, it carries our love for each other, and lastly, proof that two people can be intertwined with each other to a point that they bring something beautiful into this world. New and free from all the bullshit that use to surround me. Fresh virgin eyes, looking up to his father for guidance. And I will guide, but I will follow also. I dont see dark skys and black walls anymore. I don't hear the sirens or the screams anymore. I see Tricias flawless face and hear my sons laughter. What a perfect world this place has turned out to be after all.
MY son, my artistic inspiration;
Christian Hunter Stanley.
I'm not an enigma, if you know me, then all is out for the world to see. If you knew me in the past, then you don't know me at all. I am an ever changing, constant growing, student of life. With every day, something new is introduced to me... and with the more I know, the less I feel unique.
I have a son, he is my sun. He brightens my life in ways unimaginable.
I have a wife, or will soon. She is the single most driving force in my life that kept me plugged in, that is until she gave me a son... now they share those duties.
I have many hobbies and hobby jobs, but for the majority of the week, I am a security officer at a place I am probably most likely not aloud to mention, so I won't.
I wish things were different... I wish for change. I wish for a political upheaval... I wish for a better future for my family. I wish for greater things, but know what is real.
Oh, one last thing, as all of you know, I do graphic design, logos, sites, flash, fam pics and whatnot... I am Paypal Certified for anyone who might be interested in purchasing any of my custom one off art but afraid of being ripped off from online cons.