finding a cell phone that i can't lose... or one of my many lost cell phones, piracy in any form, ice comets, being a good person just for the sake of it, finding some time to go to a movie, a good historical fiction book, karma, camping, kayaking (although i've never really been), trying to get more sleep - much more sleep, finding the positive side to almost anything, finding free internet, figuring out why hamsters hate me, starting sentences with "i'm not judging ... just saying", moving forward mentally, emotionally and spiritually, a good laugh, a long talk, sitting by water, and new rain boots
ira glass, hugo chavez, lots of pirates, anyone who lives on whiskey dick mountain in washington, anyone who has been in a hot air balloon race, people who already know that irregardless is NOT a word!, che guevara, the genius who first presented ice comets to nasa, and bill murray. then i would take bill murray on a roadtrip to meet all of the other people and see the other things then we would... wait... oh, yeah i guess i'll meet you too... if you're interesting, understand sarcasm, don't litter, and see the point in making the world a better place.
clearly the royal tennenbaums is the only good answer here… but here are some great runners up broken flowers, the constant gardener, hotel rwanda, the motorcycle diaries, he loves me he loves me not, amelie, elizabeth, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, rushmore, fight club, the affair of the necklace, y tu mama tambien, sylvia, the big lebowski, office space, romeo & juliet and an inconvienent truth.
okay, the short version is that tv is stupid. if you watch tv you are being tricked everyday by the subversive advertising and crappy propaganda that you see. if i look on your profile and any reality tv show is in this slot you will be immediately subject to me sending an essay on how to take your head OUT of your ass. who cares about the island or the house or the fake competition? really. i'm not kidding. go do something, meet people, find out about real people that are just as ignorant as the ones on tv but live real close to you - no joke there are people just as crazy / ignorant / ugly / hot / competitive in your own neighborhood and then you could tell real stories and learn real shit and create your own island / house / fake competition to trick people into participating and then kick them out of - it's called getting a LIFE and I guarantee that firing / expelling / kicking out a friend that you know is so much more entertaining than watching actors.
i'm thinking of writing one... it's called 'he was never that into me, i chose him to avoid intimacy, and in the end it worked out to be pretty devoid of any intimacy so i guess i did a good job.' or if thats too long i'm just going to call it 'the reason i'm 31 and still single... a memoir of drunken nights, bad listeners, and rumors of being a complete whore.' i might be almost done with that... except for the new surprise ending that i'll add when it's completely edited. it turns out that i'm 31 and still single for those reasons... but also maybe because of two more small details - dating is boring and i don't put out.
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the dog whisperer, the pet psychic, ira glass ('this american life' on chicago public radio), my friend june, animal conservationists, political activists, great listeners and good friends, the ice comets guy, the dalai lama, johnny cash, revolutionaries, my friend trey who got drunk with me about 5 years ago, wes anderson, Burt of Burt Bees, Sandro Botticelli, Mother Theresa, free thinkers, astronomers, gandhi, jack black, bill murray, and korczak.