beth profile picture

beth

(burp)

About Me

I'm a 'sunday' painter... My friends love me and think i'm brilliant and also a bit retarded, and ugly boring girls are jealous of me and wish i'd drop dead. One day i will, but not soon enough for them, i'm sure.

My Interests

gardening, apparently the color red, Archery, DIY, turning back the techno-clock where applicable, in my world (and maybe even yours) comparative sociology, spastic dancing to dirty ditties spun on a platter, playing with my Boobs (maybe yours, maybe not) cooking yums, Basic Astronomy, animal intelligence, non-fiction (it's stranger) strangers (and even stranger) childish Poop humor, really bad humor (if it's good) unusual fruits and vegetables but not physics (sorry, Vladimir.) I have on display in my home a small monkey stuffed, posed and wired to a stick which was somebody's idea of a big game trophy. I have a genius cat named Boobs who can do doggy tricks. I lived briefly in North Carolina and hated it, so I left. I went to Berlin to show my paintings and stayed four years. I loved it, and I hated it, but I always love going back. I toured with Stereo Total as 'Miss Albuquerque 1996' and sang "It wasn't god who made honky tonk angels." I lived in a quonset hut without plumbing, and I am good at living on practically nothing. I have had quite an interesting life so far. I'd rather be camping. God bless our camper.

I'd like to meet:

Koko the gorilla, or any gorilla who uses American sign language.(Wait...oh damn...I don't know American sign language.)

Music:

Best use ever made of electricity.

Movies:

The Loved One! Happiness! Many are watched, few are re-watched, these are the top two re-watched on my list. Also Harold and Maude, his wardrobe is so worthy of idolatry.

Television:

I haven't had one in a while, I'm so out of it. I like to watch 'Storm Stories' on cable in those motel rooms.

Books:

like I said, non-fiction. (right now i am reading the autobiography of Donovan, and also the autobio of Colette.)

My Blog

Aaaarrghh!

Interesting times. We are witnessing everything coming apart at the seams, and we don't know how to fix it. No matter how much money and how many police we throw at all our hydra-headed problems, noth...
Posted by beth on Wed, 15 Aug 2007 05:45:00 PST

big fat toad

In my garden this evening, i discovered a big fat toad as i was watering the broccoli. This makes me happier than most folks can imagine, unless you are also a gardener. A great way to cap off a day ...
Posted by beth on Mon, 28 May 2007 08:34:00 PST

sex in the laboratory.....

"An intriguing entomological experiment shows that a male butterfly will ignore a living female butterfly of his own species in favor of a painted cardboard one, if the cardboard one is big. If the ...
Posted by beth on Wed, 22 Feb 2006 03:16:00 PST

Things That Puzzle Me: Part Two

Why don't more people blow their synapses over the caterpillar to butterfly thing? I well realize just how much of a sickening cliche of nature the caterpillar to butterfly thing is, but shit man! It ...
Posted by beth on Fri, 07 Oct 2005 03:07:00 PST

Things that puzzle me: Part One:

Who (came) up with the idea to name a brand of condoms TROJANS? Was it an individual, or was it a board meeting? I'd really like to know. How many folks are aware that it was the TROJANS who built the...
Posted by beth on Fri, 07 Oct 2005 02:45:00 PST