The Ranting Ass profile picture

The Ranting Ass

Hung like a mule

About Me

I am sure you are wondering, "Who is this ass person?" Well, that is an easy enough, yet baited, question. On the surface, I am an ass. In addition, I rant. I am just not any ol' ass; I am The Ranting Ass. I was born an ass, I have lived my whole life as an ass, and I will die an ass. My sole purpose in life is to be an ass. Do not ask me to deviate from this path that has been laid before me. I make no apologies for being an ass, looking like an ass, loving ass, ranting like an ass, or acting like an ass. These are all standard personality traits that come with being an ass.You have been marked on my profile map! Click to zoom-in.

make your own map at: www.modmyprofile.com

My Interests

Ass. Tapping ass. Spanking ass. Kicking ass. Laughing my ass off. Making you laugh your ass off. Kissing ass. Busting ass. Being a wise ass. Hauling ass. And of course more ass.

I'd like to meet:

I'd like to meet some fine asses, fast asses, fat asses, slow asses, wise asses, smart asses, punk asses, dumb asses, big asses, tough asses, weak asses, funny asses, boring asses, and all other variants of ass that walk this earth. It's not the ass that matters, it's that the ass exists that matters. You can only understand that logic if you are an ass. I'd also like to meet you, so why don't you leave me a voice message.
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Music:

Anything that I can shake my ass to.

Movies:

Asses of Fire, The Assassin, How to Get the Man's Foot Outta Your Ass, Mila Ass Painting, Love and Loathing at the Ass Lamp Lounge, The Burdened Ass, and Respect My Ass.

Television:

Chris Rock: Big Ass Jokes and Eminem's Making the Ass

Books:

The Golden Ass (Oxford World's Classics) by Apuleius and P. G. Walsh, And the Ass Saw the Angel by Nick Cave, A Good Hard Kick in the Ass: Basic Training for Entrepreneurs by Rob Adams, and 98.6 Degrees: The Art of Keeping Your Ass Alive by Cody Lundin and Russ Miller

Heroes:

Pedro, Trey Parker, Jed, Matt Stone, Cartman, Ron Burgandy, Howard Stern, Rowdy Roddy Piper, Skeletor, Cobra Commander, Dennis Leary, Kim Jung Il as portrayed in the movie Team America, Saddam Hussein's Minister of Misinformation, and that one guy in that one movie who was a total ass.

My Blog

Stupid fucking kids

What the fuck is wrong with kids today? Are your parents so incapable of raising you correctly and supervising your behavior that you feel that you can go around causing destruction and harm at the dr...
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Tue, 20 Feb 2007 10:54:00 PST

Anna Nicole Smith is dead

I know this is going to come off as cold-hearted, but I don't care. After all, I am an ass.I'm glad Anna Nicole Smith is dead. Now all I want is Britney, Paris, and Lindsey to fucking bite it so that ...
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Fri, 09 Feb 2007 05:47:00 PST

Yay for Peyton!

Not a rant....just a short blog entry. I am pleased Peyton won the big one. It has been long overdue. Gratz to him, the Colts, and coahc Dungy.
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Mon, 05 Feb 2007 08:03:00 PST

Dont be a nigger

I am about to use the word "nigger"&several times. If you are sensitive to the "n-word", stop reading now.   Still with me? Very well, you have been warned.     When I say the word ...
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Sun, 04 Feb 2007 12:48:00 PST

My rants

There is something I should explain about my blogs in order to stave the perception that I am a racist ass. You see, asses know no racism. An ass is an ass is an ass, as they say. You see, the world ...
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Sat, 03 Feb 2007 09:56:00 PST

Muslim Cab Drivers

Muslims&they piss me the fuck off. Especially the ones who are suicide bombers...or drive taxi cabs here in America.   I was reading this article (yes, asses read) about these asshat Muslim taxic...
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Fri, 26 Jan 2007 10:35:00 PST

Fucking Jews and Christmas

Allow me to preface this rant by stating that I am no racist ass. A ranting one, yes but not a racist one.   That said, WHAT THE FUCK is with Jews making any sort of demand on Americans and our C...
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Fri, 15 Dec 2006 09:39:00 PST

Mexican Flag Banned in Nevada Town - HURRAH!

Allow me to preface this bullshit article written by one Ruben Navarrette Jr. who writes for some piece of shit column out of San Diego. A small Nevada "town council voted last week, 3-2, to approve a...
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Tue, 21 Nov 2006 05:19:00 PST

Fucking illegal immigrants

Eeeeeeeeeeee aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! This really gets my goat&   http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/americas/11/14/mexico.migrants .ap/index.html   "Second-grader Saul Arellano, a U.S. citizen, appear...
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Tue, 14 Nov 2006 03:59:00 PST

The McDonalds drive-thru rant

I woke up and rolled out of my hay bed, put my hoof slippers on, moseyed my way into the cow pen for a nice warm glass of freshly squeezed milk, and socialized with the other farm animals about the go...
Posted by The Ranting Ass on Mon, 13 Nov 2006 01:20:00 PST