Mr Fox Bastard profile picture

Mr Fox Bastard

I take my women like I take my biscuits!....Ginger and Broken!

About Me


Hey Bro, let me AXE you a mutha fucking question?Who's the coolest Fox in your face right now... Oh yeah that's right bro, non other than the world famous MR FOX BASTARD!Firstly, what the fuck gives you the right to browse my goddam personal space. Secondly you ever touch any of my vixens, I will make sure you wear your goddam ass as a hat... OK... Then... Guess were cool!Heres some shit about me...I used to be the uncoolest, down in the dirt, scruffiest, ugliest mutha fucka you ever saw! Id be scratching around in bins for chicken bones, sniffing shit on the sidewalk, rolling in shit, sleeping in shit, one day I got so desperate I ate a bunch of shit... Anyway let me cut to the shit and tell you how I became MR FOX BASTARD!!!One day I was biting heads off chickens on some mutha fucking farm or some shit... Then all of a sudden, this fat mutha fucker with a goddam shotgun starts aiming at me and pulling the trigger! I said "Fuck this shit! I'm gonna run away from this Yosamite Sam piece of shit!" So first my brain sends the message to my mutha fucking legs to start running and guess what mutha fucker, I ran! What! Were you expecting fancy dialog and shit, FUCK YOU! First of all I'm a Fox and secondly, look at my goddam picture fool! Look like I give a rats ass about anything! Keep reading!Anyway he's firing lead shot up my skinny red ass, and I'm running like a Nun who just been caught sucking dick on a Sunday! Anyway to cut all the bull shit, I stumble into a snare! And what I hear you say gets caught in the mutha fucka, my leg?, My head?, My paw?, WRONG!!! My Dick fool! My mutha fucking lipstick dick gets snarled up in that snare like a shrimp in a trawler net! How did I get out? I will tell you how cracker ass, I chewed off my own DICK! That's right homie, I bit that mutha fucker clean off. Anyway I passed out after losing alot of blood and was found by some crazy honkey! This sick mutha fucker made all my wildest dreams come true? Turns out he worked for a leading government agency that specializes in testing on animals! THE MUTHA FUCKER GRAFTED ME A FULLY FUNCTIONAL 12" PONY DICK!!!! That's right fool, I'm the most well endowed Fox on the planet! My dicks bigger than your daddies arm! Anyway... I get a name in the swinging circles.........And BAM! The flood gates open! THE FIRST FOX IN PORN!AKAMR FOX BASTARD!Welcome to the ride, bro!
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My Interests

Fucking, Sleeping (in that order)

I'd like to meet:

I like that good looking dude who lives at the bottom of the pond! Oh wait mutha fucka thats me!!!..

Music:

I love music that I can sink my teeth into the back of a Vixens neck to....then Fuck! Then wait a couple of hours while my lipstick dick swells up and we get stuck together! What the fuck is that shit all about anyway?

Movies:

Movies? I aint even been in no goddam cinema fool? last time i did some fat kid was eating some ice cream then he just puked, so I eat it, his momma starts screaming and shit? i was doing that bitch a favour! Like she was gonna clean that shit up!

Television:

As long as its switched off so I can see my reflection while I Fuck!.

Books:

Books you put a damn book infront of me I will take a piss on it!

Heroes:

MY DICK! (damn girls is so big, one night with me and you will be walking like TICK TOCK from "Return to OZ")

My Blog

Just a thought?

Do you think at any point in history there has ever been a man who has tried to suck his own cock...... whilst crying?OrA clown has just finished his routine at a circus he goes back to his trailer, d...
Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Wed, 21 Feb 2007 02:10:00 PST

Open Sesame!

Does everyone remember Sesame Street!Remember Big Bird!What an absolute CUNT he was! If someone would have asked me to invent a more annoying, in your face, children's entertainer I don't think I coul...
Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Wed, 14 Feb 2007 11:58:00 PST

The PARKINSON Dream!

Yo brothas and sistas,I'm having trouble working out just what the fuck I was dreaming last night! See if any of you fools can help me out!So here it goes!I was dreaming that I was a guest on the worl...
Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Wed, 07 Feb 2007 11:46:00 PST

My Wank!

So anyways I was having trouble sleeping this afternoon (Yeah foxes sleep during the day fool... deal with it) So I decided to have a pullaby to aid me into catching some zzzzz's.So anyway I slap out ...
Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Mon, 20 Nov 2006 12:28:00 PST

POEM WINNER IS.......

An Intricate Liaison!!!With:Mr Fox Bastard,Slinking through trees,To nail a vixenAnd avoid her fleas.I think you will all agree that this poem is incredibly deep and the twist at the end is both shock...
Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Sat, 11 Nov 2006 07:41:00 PST

Fox Philosophy!

I treat my Vixens like flowers and im the butterfly, I go from one to the next tasting the nectar and then im gone.My friend Gary he more like a slug, He gets on one damn flower and picks holes in it ...
Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Fri, 10 Nov 2006 07:32:00 PST

Fox Hunting!

You know people, you would think that my life would be great since they banned fox hunting!Truth is... Its not... I miss the thrill of the chase! The sound of the hounds wailing in the distance. The f...
Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Wed, 08 Nov 2006 11:15:00 PST

Badge Designs

Hey Brothas & Vixens...Who knows if I like you enough, you may just receive a special badge... like this one of Larry below... you can cut it out and keep it forever... or do whatever you damn like wi...
Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Wed, 01 Nov 2006 11:48:00 PST

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Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Sat, 28 Oct 2006 10:51:00 PST

The Toilets at KINGS CROSS station!

Hey Brothas and Vixens!I just paid 20 goddam pence to take a piss in KINGS CROSS station!When I said to the dude ..I'm a Fox" that mutha fucka just stared at me and said."you talk.... You pay!"To top ...
Posted by Mr Fox Bastard on Thu, 26 Oct 2006 04:28:00 PST