In my own experience, the period of greatest gain in knowledge and wisdom is the most difficult period in one's life. Through a difficult period you can learn, develop inner strength, determination and courage to face the problem. Who gives you this chance? Your enemy.
~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama
There are two kinds of suffering: the suffering that leads to more suffering and the suffering that leads to the end of suffering. If you are not willing to face the second kind of suffering, you will surely continue to experience the first.~ Ajahn Chah
I'd like to meet:
The quest for more knowledge, the meaning of life, the philosophical questions—my mind is always occupied, and what’s exciting is when I get to follow through with an insight and do something. I am an abstract future thinker, looking at things from different perspectives.
I’m about the relationships and possibilities and enjoy anything with deeper meaning that leaves me wondering, with more questions to ask and things to untangle. Connecting for me means being able to intuitively ask questions of people to get them to go deeper into the things they are talking about.
Inspiring others, helping them find their purpose or meaning, being a different kind of leader from what’s traditional—that’s really gratifying. I just do that naturally. The challenge is opening up people’s minds to have their own original thoughts. I’m a listener and guide.
I think I am a mystery to people. They never really understand me and part of me enjoys that. More often though, I long to be understood.
I tend to approach my day with a structured way of getting things accomplished. People see me as organized, thorough, and easy to get along with, pulling my own weight and eager to help out when called upon. But I’m not as outgoing or as critical as I may sometimes appear. I need a balance between people contact and working on creative projects and will break away from interactions when I get tired out.
I tend to intuitively read people very quickly, but I have to be cautious not to make assumptions. I’m an observer. I get a feeling when people are interesting, and I watch from a distance, make some assessments about the situation, and then approach them and engage in conversation. I put a little bit out and a little more and see how that goes. Do I trust and like them, are they who they say they are?
I have a few deep friendships. A friendship comes best when it is worked to develop that investment. I quickly pick up on sincerity and withdraw if the person is superficial or obviously doesn’t care. When I see people who abuse their power or won’t stand behind what they say, that ticks me off. It’s about integrity. I feel other people’s feelings deeply, and taking on that burden can make me too intense and serious, where I can’t be spontaneous and fun loving.
Music:
My favorite music is usually stuff no one has ever heard of or no longer listens to. I seem to be stuck in an 80's time warp, but I have a deep passion for my music and I actually like the fact not many people listen to it. Favs include Peter Murphy, Azam Ali, Sisters of Mercy, Skinny Puppy, Lamb, Hungry Lucy, Bel Canto, Niyaz, Bauhaus, Tones on Tail, Love and Rockets, Massive Attack, Portis Head, The Smiths, Danielle Dax, Thrill Kill Kult, and on and on... I also get my GRRR on with anything industrial, lets just say it sets the perfect "mood".
Movies:
Psychological thrillers are my thing, although I do enjoy a good slasher flick if it's not too cheezy. I'm also a documentary nut and enjoy anything that makes me actually use my brain and see a different point of view. Indie films are great and I try to hit as many Sundance flicks as I can.
Television:
LOST, LOST , LOST... although I will say that I'm more of a first season fan; it's gone away from the mystical brain twister element too much. But that's OK, I just want to figure out what the hell the black smoke is all about! ;o)
I also have been getting into Heros as of late, pretty cool concept so far. Other than regular shows I'm always watching Discovery or NOVA, I'm a closet geek.
Books:
Too many to list... I do read a lot of non fiction on theology and philosophy, as well as new age hippy stuff. I also enjoy reading fiction, Anne Rice being my favorite since 8th grade. I love her other erotica works as well under her different pen name.
Heroes:
His Holiness the Dalai Lama, Noah Levine (author of Dharma Punx, truly a great book and a great inspiration), and my Mom; she is one incredible woman.
Which fucked-up genius composer are you?
Nick Cave... dark and creepy. You're a bi-polar genius, with equal passion for the most degrading aspects of humanity, as well as the beauty & wonder of God and Heaven.
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