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I’ve straightened out many of my daughters ex-boyfriends with this hand.

I know Jack is a patriot but sometimes you have to go old school. I’ve been doing this since Jack was in diapers.

This was taken during the last meeting in the oval office before I ran myself off a cliff. Right now I'm trying to figure out how the hell Logan became president.

Heller's Rules
Advice on government, business and life.
By James Heller
The Wall Street Journal, Monday, January 29, 2001Serving in the White House
(for the White House chief of staff and senior staff)
Keeping Your Bearings in the White House

Enjoy your time in public service. It may well be one of the most interesting and challenging times of your life.

Don't think of yourself as indispensable or infallible. As Charles de Gaulle said, the cemeteries of the world are full of indispensable men.

Let your family, staff and friends know that you're still the same person, despite all the publicity and notoriety that accompanies your position.

Have a deputy and develop a successor. Don't be consumed by the job or you'll risk losing your balance. Keep your mooring lines to the outside world -- family, friends, neighbors, people out of government and people who may not agree with you.

When asked for your views, by the press or others, remember that what they really want to know is the president's views.

Most of the 50 or so invitations you receive each week come from people inviting the president's chief of staff, not you. If you doubt that, ask your predecessor how many he received last week.

Keep your sense of humor. As Gen. Joe Stillwell said, “The higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of his behind.”

Be yourself. Follow your instincts. Success depends, at least in part, on the ability to “carry it off.”

Know that the amount of criticism you receive may correlate somewhat to the amount of publicity you receive.

If you are not criticized, you may not be doing much.

From where you sit, the White House may look as untidy as the inside of a stomach. As is said of the legislative process, sausage making and policy making shouldn't be seen close-up. Don't let that panic you. Things may be going better than they look from the inside.

Be able to resign. It will improve your value to the president and do wonders for your performance.

If you are lost -- “climb, conserve, and confess.” -- U.S. Navy SNJ Flight Manual

Serving in Government

Public servants are paid to serve the American people. Do it well.

Congress, the press and the bureaucracy too often focus on how much money or effort is spent, rather than whether the money or effort actually achieves the announced goal.

It is very difficult to spend “federal (the taxpayers') dollars” so that the intended result is achieved.

Beware when any idea is promoted primarily because it is “bold, exciting, innovative and new.” There are many ideas that are “bold, exciting, innovative and new,” but also foolish.

The federal government should be the last resort, not the first. Ask if a potential program is truly a federal responsibility or whether it can better be handled privately, by voluntary organizations, or by local or state governments.

As former Rep. Tom Curtis of Missouri said, “Public money drives out private money.”

Strive to make proposed solutions as self-executing as possible. As the degree of discretion increases, so too do bureaucracy, delay and expense.

Presidential leadership needn't always cost money. Look for low- and no-cost options. They can be surprisingly effective.

Include others. As former Sen. Pat Moynihan (D., N.Y.) said, “Stubborn opposition to proposals often has no other basis than the complaining question, 'Why wasn't I consulted?' ”

Watch for the “not invented here” syndrome.

“The atmosphere in which social legislation is considered is not a friend of truth.” -- Pat Moynihan

If in doubt, don't.

If still in doubt, do what's right.

Treat each federal dollar as if it was hard earned. It was -- by a taxpayer.

“Try to analyze situations intelligently, anticipate problems and move swiftly to solve them. However, when you're up to your ears in alligators, it is difficult to remember that the reason you're there is to drain the swamp.” -- Unknown

“In Washington, D.C., the size of a farewell party may be directly proportional to the honoree's new position and their prospective ability to dispense largess.” -- D.G. Cross

“Every government looking at the actions of another government and trying to explain them always exaggerates rationality and conspiracy, and underestimates incompetency and fortuity.” -- Silberman's Law of Diplomacy, U.S. Circuit Court Judge Laurence Silberman

Politics, Congress and the Press

First rule of politics: you can't win unless you're on the ballot.

Second rule: If you run, you may lose.

And if you tie, you do not win.

Politics is human beings; it's addition rather than subtraction.

“The winner is not always the swiftest, surest or smartest. It's the one willing to get up at 5 a.m. and go to the plant gate to meet the workers.” -- Unknown

In politics, every day is filled with numerous opportunities for serious error. Enjoy it.

The most underestimated risk for a politician is overexposure.

When someone with a rural accent says, “I don't know much about politics,” zip up your pockets.

If you try to please everybody, somebody's not going to like it.

Don't necessarily avoid sharp edges. Occasionally they are necessary to leadership.

“The oil can is mightier than the sword.” -- former Sen. Everett Dirksen (R., Ill.)

Arguments of convenience lack integrity and inevitably trip you up.

Remember where you came from.

Members of the House and the Senate are not there by accident. Each managed to get there for some reason. Learn what it was and you will know something important about them, about our country and about the American people.

With the press there is no “off the record.”

“There are only three responses to questions from the press: (1) 'I know and will tell you'; (2) 'I know and I can't tell you'; and (3) 'I don't know.' ” -- Dan Rather

For the Secretary of Defense

The secretary of defense is not a super general or admiral. His task is to exercise civilian control over the department for the commander in chief and the country.

Reserve the right to get into anything, and exercise it. Make your deputies and staff realize that, although many responsibilities are delegated, no one should be surprised when the secretary engages an important issue.

Manage the interaction between the Pentagon and the White House. Unless you establish a narrow channel for the flow of information and “tasking” back and forth, the process can quickly become chaotic.

Normal management techniques may not work in the department. When pushing responsibility downward, be sure not to contribute to a weakening of the cohesion of the services; what cohesion exists has been painfully achieved over the decades.

When cutting staff at the Pentagon, don't eliminate the thin layer that assures civilian control.

Avoid public spats. When a department argues with other government agencies in the press, it reduces the president's options.

Establish good relations between the departments of Defense and State, the National Security Council, CIA and the Office of Management and Budget.

Be sure key U.S. ambassadors are informed on defense activities in their countries.

Develop a personal relationship with the chairman and each of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. They are almost always outstanding public servants. In time of crisis, those relationships can be vital.

“If you get the objectives right, a lieutenant can write the strategy.” -- Gen. George Marshall

Napoleon was asked, “Who do you consider to be the greatest generals?” He responded, “The victors.”

On Business

When you initiate new activities, find things you are currently doing that you can discontinue -- whether reports, activities, etc. It works, but you must force yourself to do it. Always keep in mind your “teeth-to-tail ratio.”

Watch the growth of middle-level management. Don't automatically fill vacant jobs. Leave some positions unfilled for six to eight months to see what happens. You will find you won't need to fill some of them.

Reduce the layers of management. They put distance between the top of an organization and the customers.

Find ways to decentralize. Move decision-making authority down and out. Encourage a more entrepreneurial approach.

Prune -- prune businesses, products, activities, people. Do it annually.

Know your customers!

Develop a few key themes and stick to them. It works. Repetition is necessary. “Quality.” “Customers.” “Innovation.” “Service.” Whatever!

That which you require be reported on to you will improve, if you are selective. How you fashion your reporting system announces your priorities and sets the institution's priorities.

People do better in staff jobs if they have had operational experience. It helps to look at things from others' perspectives.

Reduce the number of lawyers. They are like beavers -- they get in the middle of the stream and dam it up.

Beware of the argument that “this is a period for investment; improvements will come in the out years.” The tension between the short term and long term can be constructive, but there is no long term without a short term.

Too often management recommends plans that look like Bob Hope's nose or a hockey stick. The numbers go down the first year or so and then up in the later years. If you accept hockey-stick plans, you will find they will be proposed year after year.

The way to do well is to do well.

Don't let the complexity of a large company mask the need for performance. Bureaucracy is a conspiracy to bring down the big. And it can. You may need to be large to compete in the world stage, but you need to find ways to avoid allowing that size to mask poor performance.

“No plan survives contact with the enemy.” -- Old military axiom

Remember: A's hire A's and B's hire C's.

“The advantage of a free market is that it allows millions of decision-makers to respond individually to freely determined prices, allocating resources -- labor, capital and human ingenuity -- in a manner that can't be mimicked by a central plan, however brilliant the central planner.” -- Friedrich A. Hayek

On Life (and Other Things)

“You can't pray a lie.” -- Mark Twain, “Huckleberry Finn”

“It takes everyone to make a happy day.” -- Marcy Heller, age seven

“The most important things in life you cannot see -- civility, justice, courage, peace.” -- Unknown

“Persuasion is a two-edged sword -- reason and emotion -- plunge it deep.” -- Prof. Lewis Sarett Sr.

“The art of listening is indispensable for the right use of the mind. It is also the most gracious, the most open and the most generous of human habits.” -- Attributed to R. Barr, St. John's College, Annapolis, Md.

“In writing if it takes over 30 minutes to write the first two paragraphs select another subject.” -- Raymond Aron

“In unanimity there may well be either cowardice or uncritical thinking.” -- Unknown

“If you're coasting, you're going downhill.” -- L.W. Pierson

“What's the difference between a good naval officer and a great one? Answer: About six seconds.” -- Adm. Arleigh Burke

“First law of holes: If you get in one, stop digging.” -- Anonymous

“Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out.” -- James B. Conant

“When drinking the water, don't forget those who dug the well.” -- Chinese proverb

“The harder I work, the luckier I am.” -- Unknown

“If it doesn't go easy, force it.” -- G.D. Rumsfeld's assessment of his son Don's operating principle at age 10

“But I am me.” -- Nick Rumsfeld, age nine

“You learn in life there are few plateaus; you are either going up or down.” -- Unknown

Perspective -- Maurice Chevalier's response when asked how it felt to reach 80: “Pretty good, considering the alternative.”

“For every human problem there is a solution that is simple, neat and wrong.” -- H.L. Mencken

Simply because a problem is shown to exist doesn't necessarily follow that there is a solution.

“If a problem has no solution, it may not be a problem, but a fact, not to be solved, but to be coped with over time.” -- Shimon Peres

“If a problem cannot be solved, enlarge it.” -- Dwight D. Eisenhower

“Most people spend their time on the 'urgent' rather than on the 'important.' ” -- Robert Hutchins

“If you think you have things under control, you're not going fast enough.” -- Mario Andretti, racecar driver

“Victory is never final. Defeat is never fatal. It is courage that counts.” -- Winston Churchill

“Intellectual capital is the least fungible kind.” -- Unknown

“The better part of one's life consists of friendship.” -- Abraham Lincoln

“When you're skiing, if you're not falling you're not trying.” -- Donald Rumsfeld

“The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.” -- F. Scott Fitzgerald

“It is seldom that liberty of any kind is lost all at once.” -- David Hume

“History marches to the drum of a clear idea.” -- W.H. Auden

“Demographics is destiny.” -- John Scanlon

If you develop rules, never have more than 10.


Movies:

Required viewing for all Neo-Cons

Television:


Books:

US ARMY SURVIVAL MANUAL SURVIVAL, EVASION, AND RECOVERY THE RANGER BOOK COUNTERINSURGENCY INTELLEIGENCE THE ART OF WAR Heroes:

DON RUMSFELD TRIBUTEGIVING THE SMACK DOWN TO JIM MIKLASZEWSKI

LAYING THE SMACK DOWN AGAIN

JUST A LITTLE FUN

GIVING THE MIDDLE FINGER TO SOME LIBERAL

FAREWELL OLD FRIEND. IN THE END WE ALL FALL ON OUR SWORD.



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