Crazy better than stupid? |
Using a babies head as a guacamole bowl?
Shooting yourself in the face at a girl scout rally?
Getting a boner at your grandmas funeral?
Telling people you are god and actually believing it?
Doing meth...
Posted by chewy on Fri, 13 Oct 2006 10:41:00 PST |
Me, myself and us |
Their faces seemed surprise when I put my rifle down to pull out a Swiss army knife. "What the fuck is that for?" some half dead guy whispered. Before I could host him to a Swiss a...
Posted by chewy on Fri, 06 Oct 2006 12:31:00 PST |
How I found God |
The diarrhea just wouldn't stop! I couldn't control it! I was trying to hold it in but no matter how hard I squeezed or held my breath it just kept coming! It was so bad that I swear my ass was ...
Posted by chewy on Thu, 21 Sep 2006 08:30:00 PST |
Needled skin and tar |
As I walked down the street the other night I couldn't help to notice how hard it was to find a hooker. The more I looked the more I searched. I began to get dizzy, real fucking dizzy. I needed one an...
Posted by chewy on Wed, 20 Sep 2006 08:57:00 PST |
There's no place like home |
Capt. Fun
We were on our way to the my favorite place. All of us with happy-meal smiles. As we where approaching I turned to the door gunner and briefed him on his point ...
Posted by chewy on Mon, 18 Sep 2006 05:15:00 PST |
Sleepless in Seattle |
It was three days. Day one. I took her home cooked her chicken parmesian, garlic bread and a spinach salad. We watched sleepless in Seattle, cuddled and and pet her head until she fell asleep in my ar...
Posted by chewy on Sun, 17 Sep 2006 05:52:00 PST |
Good times, hold the nacho's |
It was just the other night and i was hungry. "God i hate my job". Nacho's and a red-beer the perfect diet for a single guy with no outside life. I drive through the local bar parking lot looking for ...
Posted by chewy on Wed, 13 Sep 2006 08:39:00 PST |
Dear Abby wont reply:( |
Dear Abby, I have a meat factory that is losing production. I try to show the employees how to have fun but they have been bitching lately about the cleanup procedures and since its a "underground" fa...
Posted by chewy on Fri, 08 Sep 2006 11:26:00 PST |
That was fun |
Where did all these scar's come from? What time is it? Shit i totally lost track again. How long will it be until next time? My last memory before this room was at the store on the corner of...
Posted by chewy on Wed, 06 Sep 2006 12:29:00 PST |
Advice on throwing hand-grenades from moving vehicles |
Advice on throwing hand-grenades from moving vehicles.
1. Make sure you tape off pin before equiping. Eletrical tape kicks ass or for you former's "hundred mile an hour tape"
2. Position hand-gr...
Posted by chewy on Fri, 01 Sep 2006 11:50:00 PST |
