Josh Le Danger - ProfilesArchive

About Me

To know Josh Harris is to know a man surrounded by such dreadful things as concertina wire, twelve-foot cyclone fences, searchlights, sharp-shooters and dachsunds. To proceed any further into my life would be too terrifying, and I fail to understand why you would wish to bring such misery upon yourself.

Josh Le Harris
Targets Assigned: Sixty Six
Hits Completed: Sixty Seven
Favorite Weapon Piano Wire, Knuckle Dusters, Straight Razor, Yashica Mat 120 TLR
Knees Broken: Fifty Eight
Commies Down: Seven
Tongues Cut Out: Fourteen
Biggest Enemy: Myself
Get Your HITMAN Name Redemption.

My Interests

Escaping from whatever dungeon my enemies have thrown me into. Avoiding being thrown into whatever dungeon my enemies have at hand. PerHaps evEn sLeePing with both eyes shut for once. Not telling My lifE story. Art Deco architecture. In the time between, punishing the unjust. Black and white photograpy. Films with depressing endings.

I'd like to meet:

Unfortunately, all those who I would like to meet are dead, nearly dead, mostly dead, soon to be dead, or holed up in the deepest of dungeons, the darkest of prisons, the dankest of cells, or the most unamusing of amusment parks. Among these tragic souls are the prophetic photographer Weegee, the tortured author Flannery O'Connor, several imprisoned members of a certain secret society, and the woman that spawned such a miserable person as yourself.Also, the poor soul seen here:

Music:

Ben Folds. Johnny Cash. George Gershwin. Kander and Ebb. Belle and Sebastian. The Kings of Convenience. Eisely. Gogol Bordello. Rachael Yamagata. Regina Spektor. Hulk Hogan. Captain Kangaroo. Miss Feist. Norah Jones. We were married for a brief period.

Movies:

Taxidriver is the single most inspirational movie of all time. Hook. Leon the Professional. The Boondock Saints. Fight Club. A Clockwork Orange. The Illusionist. Flags of Our Fathers. Donnie Darko. Duck Soup. Buffalo 66. The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra. Road to Perdition. Crash. Tango.

Television:

Ed. Mail Call. M*A*S*H. MythBusters. Man Vs. Wild. King of the Hill. Wonder Pets. Criminal Minds. Kid Nation. Survivorman. Conan the Great. You Bet Your Life. Jeapordy. Dirty Jobs. Ace of Cakes. Cops. Captain Kangaroo.

Books:

Anything Steinbeck. The Bible. Sun Tzu's The Art of War is the single greatest book (aside from the Bible) ever. The Zombie Survival Handbook. A Long Way Gone (Memoirs of a Boy Soldier). The Series of Unfortunate Events. Once again, A Clockwork Orange and Fight Club. Weegee's Naked City. That wouldn't hurt. Walter the Farting Dog. And the other Walter the Farting Dog books. You know, the one with the yard sale, and the one with the cruise ship. And then the cruise ship dies in the middle of the ocean. And then Walter was put on a life boat behind the ship because he smelled so bad. And then, he farted and his fart pushed the ship all the way back to land. So, so poignant.

Heroes:

Those who know what it means to be an Associate. Travis Bickle. Frank Castle. Chesty Puller. The other Josh Harris' of the world. Jesus. Sinners make the best saints. The apple of my moustache, Jamichelle. The coolest Bully ever, Gster Punk. Jimmy Stewart. Tobias Rieper. You. LeVar Burton. And least of all (only in stature), Shrimpy.

My Blog

Question?

If you ate a roll of film, would it take a picture everytime you opened your mouth?
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Sun, 10 Aug 2008 11:39:00 PST

I Didn’t Know You Then, Did I Girl?

These things make me happy: My little familyThe Kings of ConvenienceRegina SpektorMaking birthday presentsBread pudding with vanilla ice cream Things that make me unhappy:You. Waiting tables is the be...
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Tue, 22 Jul 2008 11:28:00 PST

Bussing

At the bucks, I had to kick my ass for a year to be promoted to lead. Now, my job is to support everyone, and make sure they are okay, and clean up their messes.At Pane, my application wasn't reviewe...
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Fri, 01 Feb 2008 12:44:00 PST

MacieFace and a Polygraph

Alright Team, this is how it's going to go:I love having a baby. She rocks the world. She drools, and cries, and poops, and quite oft smells, but I still love her. Well much.On the other hand, I do...
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Wed, 23 Jan 2008 09:10:00 PST

Macie Face.

Hey Team,I love you all.Jamie had a baby last week. Or, the week before. Eleven days ago. Macie is pretty amazing. She has long toes, and longer farts. Really big farts. Without a doubt, she is ...
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Mon, 19 Nov 2007 06:56:00 PST

The Rundown

Ok team, here's the deal:The baby hasn't been born, yet. Tomorrow, Jamie is being induced. In-deuced. Double deuced. So, Macie-Face should be born Wednesday. Our luck, Three in the Ante.In other,...
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Tue, 06 Nov 2007 07:15:00 PST

Read a book

After a sabbatical of a few years, I've started to read once again. Every book I can get my hands on. I suggest the following: The Art of War, Sun Tzu, the Penguin Classics edition, I thin...
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Fri, 24 Aug 2007 09:31:00 PST

I didn't even get to dig the hole.

My grandparent's dog died. I was wondering earlier today when that was going to happen. This is my favorite holiday of all time. We're having a girl. I love you,Joshua David Harris P...
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Thu, 05 Jul 2007 07:03:00 PST

The Greatest American Songwriters.

There was George Gershwin. Then George Gershwin was replaced by Johnny Cash. Johnny Cash was replaced by Ben Folds. And that, ladies and gentlemen, was a brief history of the greates...
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Sun, 29 Apr 2007 11:32:00 PST

Trap Shots

Yesterday's discovery: I'm better with shotguns.My landlord is building the most beautiful car ever.Jessica just walked past me. Long Live Our Great Association,Josh Harris PS Eat your veg...
Posted by Josh Le Danger on Mon, 27 Nov 2006 09:22:00 PST