Awkward Ninja - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I am unaccustomed to speaking, or even typing loudly, since I am a ninja. As part of the code of ninja we must be silent, at all times, lest our enemies hear the pitter-patter of our tiny, but graceful, ninja feet. I trained in the deadly dark assassin arts at Ninja-Tech in Sapporo, Japan. There I learned to become one with shadow, to strike at my enemies without mercy, and to fight with honor. Sure, it was kind of a party college, but I got through. I also minored in communications. After college I got an internship with L.L. Bean in Maine. There I worked in the mail room and performed various ninja duties for upper management. I brought great honor to my clan. However, even though I am greatly accomplished in the ninja arts I am....very shy. I have a most terrible time making friends or meeting girls. I never know what to say. I get so nervous around people I trip and fall, knock over a vase, accidentally perform a dim-mak death touch to someone's cat. It's very embarrassing. That is why it was recommended to me to try myspace, to meet others in a less than awkward way.

My Interests

Most of my day is spent in the constant honing and traing of my ninja skills. Somedays I sit motionless on a rooftop, watching people and hiding in the shadows. Somedays I hide outside a womens dorm at the local college. Those are good days. I also engage in hand-to-hand combat with other ninja's and shaolin monks over maters of martial arts honor. I'm pretty good at nintendo too.

I'd like to meet:

I have spent most of my life in Ninja Monasteries, training in the art of ninjitsu, learning to hide in plain sight, and preparing for the day I would give my life for the honor of my clan. But ninja monasteries are less than social places. If possible, I would love to hang out with other ninjas. Infiltrating large building on friday nights, squaring off in mock kumite circles on weekends, or watching a movie. I would especially love to meet a nice woman ninja. Somebody sweet, who likes dogs, walks in the park, and bringing honor to the clan. But don't get me wrong. I'd love to hang out with non-ninja's too. I'm also trying to start a band. Something Slayer/Emo/Garth-Brooks-ish. I'm pretty good at bass guitar, so getting together to jam would be pretty cool. But please...no pirates.

Music:

I like a lot of indiependent rock. My favorite band is 'Ninja Clan', but I also like the Postal Service and Bare Naked Ladies. Well, mostly their early albums. I went to a few concerts, but I felt out of place. Everyone else was wearing a BNL t-shirt, and all I had was my ninja garb. I didn't get past the second song.

Movies:

I love movies. Anything with ninja's, fighting for honor, or smoke bombs. They really get my blood going. I also love Strange Brew.

Television:

I really got into 'Lost' for a while, but then I found something strangely compeling about 'My Name is Earl'. It was like I was watching me...if I wasn't a ninja. I'm also into 'American Idol'. I think that if I hadn't spent my entire life training to be a shadow warrior I could have been a pretty good singer. I think I would have gone all the way to Broadway.

Books:

Sun Tzu's The Art of War. Tuesdays With Murray

Heroes:

Tanaka Koincho, founder of my ninja clan, expert swordsman, a true poet warrior.Captian Kirk. He commands with such strength and loves so tenderly.