clair profile picture

clair

Tweedle dee tweedle dum...

About Me



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I have to be honest and say that I've struggled with what to put here. I did the work thing and got scared by the type of messages I got... You know who you are ---- and thanks but - I don't want no strings attached sex....Then I did the "about me" thing but I actually think or at least hope that I am funnier and more interesting in real life.... Then I thought about quotes but I couldn't think of any... apart from: "history... it's just one fucking thing after another" ... It makes me chuckle but that doesn't give you any insights - so I conceed defeat.......PS. If you are an aspiring model then please PLEASE PLEASE go straight to the Nuts or Loaded page.

My Interests



Talking nonsense. Day dreaming. Laughing. Trying to get cultured but not yet succeeding. Making cocktails. Witch woo stuff where widow twanky types tell me my future and I try not to laugh. Media stuff. Misbehaviour that makes me chuckle. Funny stuff that makes me laugh. Girly stuff like clothes and make up. Listening to stories... Music. Friends. Art. Films. Trying to ice skate (I fall over) or ski (ditto). Playing pool. Writing my book... hmmm that's not going too well since myspace...I like getting up to harmless mischief X

I'd like to meet:


LayoutCodez.net
Who knows. You tell me.I am especially interested in total loons, people affected by the moon, misfits and undesirables x

Music:

Where to begin? Everything and anything. Here's a few: Razorlight, Snow Patrol, The Kooks, London Electricity, Pixies, Massive Attack, Boy Kill Boy,The Streets, Libertines, The Strokes, Oasis, Lily Allen, The Feeling, The Clash, Basement Jaxx, Green Day, Bad Religion, Fatboy Slim, Groove Armada, The Astronaughts, Dolly Parton, Van Morrison, Jethro Tull, Joy Division, The La's, Stiff Little Fingers, Scissor Sisters, Madonna, Dionne Warwick, Diana Ross, Nick Cave. I could go on. Then I like classical and am prone to jig around to Girls Aloud and sing along to Take That so shoot me now. Then there's also little chris but I argue it's a good song and a good song is a good song... ho hum.

Movies:

Same as above. I might just be a un cultured slob. Give me any old rubbish and I'll watch it apart from Western's and war films. Most likely to say " yes I'll watch that horror film," and then spend half of the film with my head in my hands....and have to sleep with a light on.

Television:

The only thing I can mention is Funland and Shameless. I want some time off so I can watch daytime TV and shout at the telly... or just sleep.

Books:

Here's what I last read - Hotel Babylon, The Diary of a Sex Fiend, The Game, How to lose friends and alienate people....

Heroes:


Everyone who can drink two sambucas and remain standing...And of course my brother: he's the funniest man I know.

My Blog

Inspirational quote - Jon Heggarty BBH

I work in media.  I don't live in media.  
Posted by clair on Fri, 10 Nov 2006 06:53:00 PST

What a wonderful day

The funniest moments in my office often  happen when someone I  least expect comes out with filth and they are saying it in a work related capacity. So imagine the scene. One...
Posted by clair on Fri, 10 Nov 2006 06:50:00 PST

So yesterday...

I am at Stanstead airport and I have been queuing for 40 minutes to go through the security check. When it's my turn, this butch dikey lesbian thunders towards me like some WWE wrestler spying a new v...
Posted by clair on Tue, 07 Nov 2006 04:56:00 PST

Widow Twanky

So there we were, Clark and I at this Halloween party in Islington surrounded by people dressed up and in character and the PR telling us to go into the garden as there would be a surprise for us...
Posted by clair on Thu, 02 Nov 2006 01:10:00 PST

BACC

I have been at war with the BACC today. For those of you that don't know they are the up tight regulators of what we can and cannot put on the TV in terms of advertising at certain hours. For me it me...
Posted by clair on Thu, 02 Nov 2006 12:49:00 PST

Ohhh my mouth

 I found myself saying the following words in all seriousness today: " I don't mind soft porn but I draw the line at pictures of women fiddling with themselves". EUW! I mean for god's sake. ...
Posted by clair on Mon, 30 Oct 2006 09:52:00 PST

Having lunch on your nails

Okay can someone enlighten me as to why people chew - with such vigour - their nails? I have just suffered 40 minutes of a hideous tube journey home with a guy that gnawed on his nails like some ...
Posted by clair on Mon, 30 Oct 2006 12:14:00 PST

Pool table or no pool table

"Can we have a free Nuts branded pool table for the office?" I ask to an outside company who we are working with. The answer is yes. Then it occurs to me that whilst this would be cool there's si...
Posted by clair on Tue, 24 Oct 2006 11:05:00 PST

Lessons I have learnt from my team

Sam - Eat lots of cake it's good for you Aimi - Don't mix alcohol with mobile phones e.g. text or call .... or vomit up the wall in front of an entire editorial team.... Bex - Me to her - describ...
Posted by clair on Fri, 29 Sep 2006 07:34:00 PST

Things people have said that have made me cry with laughter

A bod at work: "What -  so was it a case of one eye open and the lights switched off?" A senior bod in pubishing "I don't want to open the magazine and see a picture of a granny getting it" A fri...
Posted by clair on Thu, 28 Sep 2006 10:00:00 PST