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Gerstein

WIND SHIFTS

About Me


www.bengerstein.com

My Interests



"Give up sainthood, renounce wisdom,
And it will be a hundred times better for everyone.

Give up kindness, renounce morality,
And men will rediscover filial piety and love.

Give up ingenuity, renounce profit,
And bandits and thieves will disappear.

These three are outward forms alone; they are not sufficient in themselves.
It is more important
To see the simplicity,
To realize one's true nature
To cast off selfishness
And temper desire."

- Lao Tsu

"One must not hurry."

- Auguste Rodin

"...to grasp everything that we may encounter according to its particular intensity without worrying much about how long it will last. Ultimately, this may be the best and most direct way of expecting the utmost of everything - even its duration. If we allow an encounter with a given thing to be shaped by this expectation that it may last, every such experience will be spoiled and falsified, and ultimately it will be prevented from unfolding its most proper and authentic potential and fertility. All the things that cannot be gained through our pleading can be given to us only as something unexpected, something extra: this is why I am yet again confirmed in my belief that often nothing seems to matter in life but the longest patience."

- Rainer Maria Rilke

"I ask nobody to follow me. Everyone should follow their own inner voice."

- Mahatma Gandhi

"A man who has a vision is not able to use the power of it until after he has performed the vision on earth for the people to see."

- Black Elk

"There really is no such thing as Art. There are only artists."

- E.H. Gombrich

"Ultimately, you must forget about technique. The further you progress, the fewer teachings there are. The Great Path is really No Path."

- Morihei Ueshiba

"A hundred times every day I remind myself that my inner and outer lives are based on the labors of others, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving."

- Albert Einstein

"Be loose: remember this word as deeply as possible. Let it penetrate you: Be loose - so that in every situation you can flow, easily, water-like; remain loose like water. So don't create a pattern - but the whole of society tries to create a pattern, and all the religions try to create a pattern. Only a very few persons have been courageous enough to say the truth, and the truth is: Be loose and natural! If you are loose you will be natural, of course."

- Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh

"Your life has a limit but knowledge has none. If you use what is limited to pursue what has no limit, you will be in danger. If you understand this and still strive for knowledge, you will be in danger for certain! If you do good, stay away from fame. If you do evil, stay away from punishments. Follow the middle; go by what is constant, and you can stay in one piece, keep yourself alive, look after your parents, and live out your years."

- Chuang Tzu

"Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth."

- Oscar Wilde

"When discipline begins to be natural, a part of you, it is very important to learn to let go. For the warrior, letting go is connected with relaxing within discipline, in order to experience freedom. Freedom here does not mean being wild or sloppy; rather it is letting yourself go so that you fully experience your existence as a human being. Letting go is completely conquering the idea that discipline is a punishment for a mistake or a bad deed that you have committed, or might like to commit. You have to completely conquer the feeling that there is something fundamentally wrong with your human nature and that therefore you need discipline to correct your behavior. As long as you feel that discipline comes from outside, there is still a lingering feeling that something is lacking in you. So letting go is connected with letting go of any vestiges of doubt or hesitation or embarrassment about being you as you are. You have to relax with yourself in order to fully realize that discipline is simply the expression of your basic goodness. You have to appreciate yourself, respect yourself, and let go of your doubt and embarrassment so that you can proclaim your goodness and basic sanity for the benefit of others."

- Chogyam Trungpa

"There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, andbecause there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. If you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is; nor how valuable it is; nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours, clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep directly open to and aware of the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at any time. There is only a queer, divine satisfaction; a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others."

- Martha Graham

"It never happens the same way twice. Generally, it happens when we least expect it. And it’s usually when we’ve surrendered our so-called knowledge, our convictions, and abandoned all hope that we enter a state where we’re able to receive it. Revelation is always present. It’s always here. We’re the ones who don’t let it in. Knowledge is always present. Enlightenment is always present, floating above everything, ready to be received. It’s only because we’re so completely blinded by everything we think we know and want to do that we can’t receive it. But at the moment we surrender, for whatever reason, it makes us a bit passive and open, and that’s when we receive it." [ Listen ]

- Mirra Alfassa, The Mother

"From around the age of six, I had the habit of sketching from life. I became an artist, and from fifty on began producing works that won some reputation, but nothing I did before the age of seventy was worthy of attention. At seventy-three, I began to grasp the structures of birds and beasts, insects and fish, and of the way plants grow. If I go on trying, I will surely understand them still better by the time I am eighty-six, so that by ninety I will have penetrated to their essential nature. At one hundred, I may well have a positively divine understanding of them, while at one hundred and thirty, forty, or more I will have reached the stage where every dot and every stroke I paint will be alive. May Heaven, that grants long life, give me the chance to prove that this is no lie."

- Hokusai

"It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the ones most responsive to change."

- Darwin

"In every age there is a turning-point, a new way of seeing and asserting the coherence of the world."

- J. Bronowski

"You always have to get through the first obstacle that says, 'I can't do it,' whether in your mind or for real, and be able to adapt to anything that's put in your path. It's a method for learning how to move in the world. For finding the liberty men used to have."

- David Belle

"One should be prepared to receive ninety-nine percent of an enemy's attack and stare death right in the face in order to illumine the Path."

- Morihei Ueshiba

"Nothing human disgusts me except deliberate cruelty."

- Tennessee Williams

"There are no limits. There are plateaus, but you must not stay there, you must go beyond them. A man must constantly exceed his level."

- Bruce Lee

"To believe your own thought, to believe what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men, for the inmost in due time becomes the outmost, and our first thought is rendered back to us by the trumpets of the Last Judgement."

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Look what is happening in the world - we are being conditioned by society, by the culture in which we live, and that culture is the product of man - there is nothing holy, or divine, or eternal about culture. Culture, society, books, radios, all that we listen to and see, the many influences of which we are either conscious or unconscious, all these encourage us to live within a very small fragment of the vast field of the mind. Unless we bring about a radical change in this fragmentation there can be no revolution at all; there will be modifications, economic, social and so-called cultural but man will go on suffering. Then when you see, you must question yourself, and that is why it is very important to understand how you See - how the total mind can act. There is no method. Any method, system, repetition or habit, is essentially only part of the corner of the field. Please do realize this, because when you realize it, you are free of the enormous weight of all authority, and so free of the past."

- J. Krishnamurti

I'd like to meet:

3.
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Music:



Now
Happenings, Things, Pieces, Events
Once A Boy Was Born Into The World
Winter Reflections
Family Pieces
Family Film Collage
Meditations From Behind The Couch, Vitreous
May 24, 2006 + 1977
For Brakhage

Jack Newman reads Sholem Aleichem

Berl Isaac
Naches fun Kinder

Conlon Nancarrow

Player Piano Study No. 15, with trombones

Music Box Study No. 2
Music Box Study No. 3
Music Box Study No. 4

"Even though our path is completely different from the warrior arts of the past, it is not necessary to abandon totally the old ways. Absorb venerable traditions into this Art by clothing them with fresh garments, and build on the classic styles to create better forms.”

- Morihei Ueshiba

The Ben Gerstein Collective
with Jacob Garchik , Jacob Sacks , Eivind Opsvik , Thomas Morgan and Dan Weiss

1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5

"The joy one feels at every successful metamorphosis is not the satisfaction of a wretched craving for distraction, but a response to the intellect's age-old need to free itself from the tedious, illusory paradise of congealed memories and seek a new, an incomparably vaster realm of experience in which the frontiers between the inner world, as it is conventionally termed, and the outer world will tend to become more and more blurred and, quite possibly, disappear completely one day...”

- Max Ernst

the UP
with Jonathan Moritz , Eivind Opsvik and John McLellan

1 , 2 , 3 , 4

"The past is implicit in our culture, which we think is so wonderful (the tradition, the beliefs, the memories, the obedience to it), and all that is put aside completely, forever, when you realize there is no method of any kind to bring freedom from the "little corner". But you have to learn all about the little corner. Then you are free of the burden which makes you insensitive. It is you yourself who have to find out, not according to somebody else, so you are free from any supposition, from any theology.”

- J.Krishnamurti

MOTH

1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5

John Cage: You don't, do you really, think of yourself as on the search for an image...
Morton Feldman: No...
John Cage: ...which you will find...
Morton Feldman: ...no...
John Cage: ...and linger with?
Morton Feldman: ...no. No... All I want, [long pause] John, is to just have enough stamina to sit down and make an action. So if I'm in a search for anything it's that stamina. I found that just this weekend simply buying an air conditioner... See I couldn't work all this week and I attribute it to all psychological conditions. I became very poetic about the state of my work. But I bought an air conditioner and I started to work right away. Practical things...
John Cage: Exactly...

I. Moderato from the Sonata for Two Pianos by Igor Stravinsky

"All techniques can be helpful but they are just a groping in the dark. Suddenly one day, doing something, you will become a witness. You will sit silently behind, you will watch it - that day meditation has happened; that day technique is no longer a hindrance, no longer a help. You can enjoy it if you like, like an exercise, it gives a certain vitality, but there is no need now - now the real meditation has happened. Meditation is witnessing. To meditate means to become a witness. Meditation is not a technique at all! But you need techniques because that final understanding is very far away from you; hidden deep within you, but still very far away from you. Right this moment you can attain it, but you will not attain it, because your moment goes on, your mind goes on. Techniques will bridge the gap, they are just to bridge the gap. So in the beginning techniques are meditations; in the end you will laugh, techniques are not meditation. Meditation is a totally different quality of being, it has nothing to do with anything. But it will happen only in the end, don't think it has happened in the beginning, otherwise the gap will not be bridged."

- Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh

II. Très Rapide , from Messagesquisse by Pierre Boulez

"Theory is the general; experiments are the soldiers."

- Leonardo da Vinci

J.X. Bach

Random Elements

"It's fine that you are all deep into music. But there's something deeper and if you would go deeper, if you go to the source of where the music is being made, you'll find something even more interesting. At the source, everyone's individual music is made. If you ask what the deep place is, it's your own life and it's knowing your own life, that own way that you live....You all have to give up the idea of wanting to become good or great at music. I'm 71, but it has taken me 50 years to develop my own kind of breathing. And so instead of wanting to get great really quickly, you have to be willing to work at music for many, many years. It is taking your own health, your own power, your own strength, and training it and moving it, which is the deeper aspect of music. The reason that we use sounds is to get to the basics of human life, of the human health and the strength... The movement of the life force, the movement that comes out of the instrument, is just simply your own pulse. When you hear some music or hear some sound, if for some reason you like it very well, the reason is that sound is in balance or in harmony with your pulse. And so making a sound, you try to make various different sounds that imitate those of the universe, but what you are finally making is your own sound, the sound of yourself."

- Watazumi Doso Roshi

Chinatown

1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 , 6 , 7 , 8 , 9 , 10 , 11 , 12 , 13 , 14 , 15 , 16

"Music is such a thing that through your music you can be judged. It's not any particular way, it's from the experience because through music you express yourself. My approach to music is very deep. I do not compromise with anybody or anything else in the world. I do not care, I don't care if anybody appreciates it or not; I don't care. When I start I always like to play better, nice, good, heavenly music. I want to really go beyond this materialistic world towards Space-there, no compromise. I really want to know-not for the sake of enjoyment, entertainment, no. In the beginning portions-naturally, with tabla, that's another chapter, a completely different chapter; the intricacies and mathematics are there. A musician must lift up the souls of the listeners, and take them towards Space."

- Nikhil Banerjee

Carlo Gesualdo
Ave, dulcissima Maria

"Most become trapped by the notion of a certain tactile resistance, concerned with the idea that a certain octave passage is difficult to play. There is very little that you can do there after to escape it. It will always be to some extent the stuff of your nightmares. You can’t really get away from it. If, on the other hand, it doesn’t quite exist for you—if it’s not allowed to exist by virtue of the fact that you drown it out, that you surround it with so many things that it’s simply one tantalizing distraction among many—it can never assume those gigantic proportions in your imagination. That’s why I think that the whole idea of doing things which seem honorably difficult is quite wrong. The whole idea of approaching music by virtue of the concert experience because that happens to be the tried and true and certainly trying way to make music is completely wrong.”

- Glenn Gould

Elliott Carter

90+
Changes
Figment

Frederic Chopin

Preludes Op. 28 Nos. 2 , 4 , 6

"So what interests us now bespeaks our condition and no one else's. No amount of historical learning can replace new understanding with old understanding. All one can hope to do is add depth and detail to our misunderstanding. If that seems a paradoxical thing to say, that has been precisely the intention.”

- Richard Taruskin

Antonio Vivaldi

D minor Concerto, Allegro

J.S. Bach

Brandenburg Concerto No.6
Nun komm der heiden heiland

"If materialism wins, humanity is licked."

- Buckminster Fuller

Rajasthan

Ghoomar

Movies:


"If it can be written, or thought, it can be filmed."
- Stanley Kubrick
"I mean, no one truly understands it, just as no one's parents truly understand one's true love. Yet a work of art must have a life in society; once the artist has finished making it, it belongs to others. But he never made it with the idea of taking it into society. Any man that sets out to find a girl to introduce to his parents is never likely to fall in love. Any man that sets out to make a work for audiences is never going to make a work of art. A work of art is made for the most personal reasons--as an expression of love."
- Stan Brakhage
"Artistic creation, after all, is not subject to absolute laws, valid from age to age; since it is related to the more general aim of mastery of the world, it has an infinite number of facets, the vincula that connect man with his vital activity; and even if the path towards knowledge is unending, no step that takes man nearer to a full understanding of the meaning of his existence can be too small to count."
- Andrey Tarkovsky
"I mean that the kind of film we are embarking on offers dangerous possibilities of artistic idea-diarrhea. To decide at every moment what is right and true and proper can be rather tricky. And the effort must not be noticeable either. Everything must give an impression of being natural--and yet be possible for us to create with our limited material resources."
- Ingmar Bergman

Television:



"And one certainly does rise above that mark by despising what is mediocre. In my opinion, one must begin at least by having some respect for the mediocre and know that it means something, and that it is only reached with great difficulty."

- Vincent Van Gogh

Books:


"It was all so simple, all so wonderfully easy, after all; there were no longer any abysses, any difficulties. The whole trick was to let yourself go. That thought shone through his whole being as the result of his life: let yourself go. Once you did that, once you had given up, yielded, surrendered, renounced all props and all firm ground underfoot, once you listened solely to the counsel in your own heart, everything was gained. Then everything was good, there was no longer any dread, no longer any danger."
- Herman Hesse
"'Does it rue thee? Does it rue thee much?' Such words were like the patterns of the aprons and kerchiefs and the coloured border at the top of the stocking, already somewhat assimilated to the present because of having come so far, but still mysterious visitants."
- Robert Musil
"Any life, however long and complicated it may be, actually consists of a single moment - the moment when a man knows forever more who he is."
- Jorge Luis Borges
"An American can fill up a space in having his movement of time by adding unexpectedly anything and yet getting within the included space everything he had intended getting."
- Gertrude Stein
"He will write as though he stood among and watched the end of man. I decline to accept the end of man. It is easy enough to say that man is immortal because he will endure: that when the last ding-dong of doom has clanged and faded from the last worthless rock hanging tideless in the last red and dying evening, that even then there will still be one more sound: that of his puny inexhaustible voice, still talking. I refuse to accept this. I believe that man will not merely endure: he will prevail. He is immortal, not because he alone among creatures has an inexhaustible voice, but because he has a soul, a spirit capable of compassion and sacrifice and endurance. The poet's, the writer's, duty is to write about these things. It is his privilege to help man endure by lifting his heart, by reminding him of the courage and honor and hope and pride and compassion and pity and sacrifice which have been the glory of his past. The poet's voice need not merely be the record of man, it can be one of the props, the pillars to help him endure and prevail."
- William Faulkner
"I was a young man, starving and drinking and trying to be a writer. I did most of my reading at the downtown L.A. Public Library, and nothing that I read related to me or to the streets or to the people about me. It seemed as if everybody was playing word-tricks, that those who said almost nothing at all were considered excellent writers. Their writing was an admixture of subtlety, craft and form, and it was read and it was taught and it was ingested and it was passed on. It was a comfortable contrivance, a very slick and careful Word-Culture. One had to go back to the pre-Revolution writers of Russia to find any gamble, any passion. There were exceptions but those exceptions were so few that reading them was quickly done, and you were left staring at rows and rows of exceedingly dull books. With centuries to look back on, with all their advantages, the moderns just weren't very good."
- Charles Bukowski
"Are the dead restored? The books say no, the night shouts yes."
- John Fante
"Our task is to go beneath the tranquillity of creed and tradition in order to overhear the echoes of wrestling and to recapture the living insights. The way to truth is an act of reason; the love of truth is an act of the spirit. Every act of reasoning has a transcendent refrence to spirit. We think through reason because we strive through spirit. We think through reason because we are certain of meaning. Reason withers without spirit, without the truth about all life. Wise criticism always begins with self-criticism. The criticism of reason, the challenge, and the doubts of the unbeliever may, therefore, be more helpful to the integrity of faith than the simple reliance on one's own faith."
- Abraham Joshua Heschel
"....and I saw there, in the auditorium, young American girls, for the first time. And have loved them as flesh things emanating from real life, that is, in contrast to my own, a scraping and floating through the last three red and blue stripes of the flag, that settles the hash of the lower middle class. So that even sprawled there in the snow, with my blood and pompous isolation, I vaguely knew of a glamorous world and was mistaken into thinking it could be gotten from books."
- LeRoi Jones
"He had been born in Ohio, had studied in Paris and Rome, had taught in Ecuador and Japan. He was a recognized art expert, and it puzzled people why, during the past ten winters, he chose to bury himself at St Bart’s. While endowed with the morose temper of genius, he lacked originality and was aware of that lack; his own paintings always seemed beautifully clever imitations, although one could never quite tell whose manner he mimicked. His profound knowledge of innumerable techniques, his indifference to ‘schools’ and ‘trends’, his detestation of quacks, his conviction that there was no difference whatever between a genteel aquarelle of yesterday and, say, conventional neoplasticism or banal nonobjectivism of today, and that nothing but individual talent mattered—these views made of him an unusual teacher. St Bart’s was not particularly pleased either with his methods or with their results, but kept him on because it was fashionable to have at least one distinguished freak on the staff. Among the many exhilarating things he taught was that the order of the solar spectrum is not a closed circle but a spiral of tints from cadmium red and oranges through a strontian yellow and a pale paradisal green to cobalt blues and violets, at which point the sequence does not grade into red again but passes into another spiral, which starts with a kind of lavender grey and goes on to Cinderella shades transcending human perception. He taught that there is no such thing as the Ashcan School or the Cache Cache School or the Cancan School. That the work of art created with string, stamps, a Leftist newspaper, and the droppings of doves is based on a series of dreary platitudes. That there is nothing banal and more bourgeois that paranoia. That Dali is really Norman Rockwell’s twin brother kidnapped by gypsies in babyhood.
He dreamed of mellowing his pigments as the Old Masters had done—with honey, fig juice, poppy oil, and the slime of pink snails. He loved water colours and he loved oils, but was wary of the too fragile pastel and the too coarse distemper. He studies his mediums with the care and patience of an insatiable child—one of those painter’s apprentices, lads with bobbed hair and bright eyes who would spend years grinding colours in the workshop of some great Italian skiagrapher, in a world of amber and paradisal glazes. At eight, he had once told his mother that he wanted to paint air. At nine, he had known the sensuous delight of a graded wash. What did it matter to him that gentle chiaroscuro, offspring of veiled values and translucent undertones, had long since died behind the prison bars of abstract art, in the poorhouse of hideous primitivism? He placed various objects in turn—an apple, a pencil, a chess pawn, a comb—behind a glass of water and peered through it at each studiously: the red apple became a clear-cut red band bounded by a straight horizon, half a glass of Red Sea, Arabia Felix. The short pencil, if held obliquely, curved like a stylized snake, but if held vertically became monstrously fat—almost pyramidal. The black pawn, if moved to and fro, divided into a couple of black ants. The comb, stood on end, resulted in the glass’s seeming to fill with beautifully striped liquid, a zebra cocktail."
- Vladimir Nabokov
"There are few of us who have not sometimes wakened before dawn, either after one of those dreamless nights that make us almost enamoured of death, or one of those nights of horror and misshapen joy, when through the chambers of the brain sweep phantoms more terrible than reality itself, and instinct with that vivid life that lurks in all grotesques, and that lends to Gothic art its enduring vitality, this art being, one might fancy, especially the art of those whose minds have been troubled with the malady of reverie. Gradually white fingers creep through the curtains, and they appear to tremble. In black fantastic shapes, dumb shadows crawl into the corners of the room and crouch there. Outside, there is the stirring of birds among the leaves, or the sound of men going forth to their work, or the sigh and sob of the wind coming down from the hills, and wandering round the silent house, as though it feared to wake the sleepers, and yet must needs call forth sleep from her purple cave. Veil after veil of thin dusky gauze is lifted, and by degrees the forms and colours of things are restored to them, and we watch the dawn remaking the world in its antique pattern. The wan mirrors get back their mimic life. The flameless tapers stand where we had left them, and besides them lies the half-cut book that we had been studying, or the letter that we had been afraid to read, or that we had read too often. Nothing seems to us changed. Out of the unreal shadows of the night comes back the real life that we had known. We have to resume it where we had left off, and there steals over us a terrible sense of the necessity for the continuance of energy in the same wearisome round of stereotyped habits, or a wild longing, it may be, that our eyelids might open some morning upon a world that had been refashioned anew in the darkness for our pleasure, a world in which things would have fresh shapes and colours, and be changed, or have other secrets, a world in which the past would have little or no place, or survive, at any rate, in no conscious form of obligation or regret, the remembrance even of joy having its bitterness, and the memories of pleasure their pain."
- Oscar Wilde

Heroes:


"We pack the physical outline of the creature we see with all the ideas we have already formed about him, and in the complete picture of him which we compose in our minds those ideas have certainly the principal place. In the end they come to fill out so completely the curve of his cheeks, to follow so exactly the line of his nose, they blend so harmoniously in the sound of his voice that these seem to be no more than a transparent envelope, so that each time we see the face or hear the voice it is our own ideas of him which we recognize and to which we listen....in whom I can distinguish the charming mistakes of my childhood, and who, incidentally, is less like his successor than he is like the other people I knew at that time, as though one's life were a series of galleries in which all the portraits of any one period had a marked family likeness, the same (so to speak) tonality..."
- Marcel Proust
"In all those stories the hero
is beyond himself into the next
thing, be it those labors
of Hercules, or Aeneas going into death.
I thought the instant of the one humanness
in Virgil's plan of it
was that it was of course human enough to die,
yet to come back, as he said, hoc opus, hic labor est.
That was the Cumaean Sibyl speaking.
This is Robert Creeley, and Virgil
is dead now two thousand years, yet Hercules
and the Aeneid, yet all that industrious wis-
dom lives in the way the mountains
and the desert are waiting
for the heroes, and death also
can still propose the old labors.
- Robert Creeley
"The hero is he who is immovably centered."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson