Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. profile picture

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

Good conversation is hard to find in this town.

About Me

Good conversation is hard to find in this town.I am a HUMANIST"I don't want to be a product of my environment. I want my environment to be a product of me." - Frank Costello.I have a blog: www.blueberryscradle.blogspot.com Read it.There is an idea of a Jessica Miller; some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me: only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable... I simply am not there. My COVER.
↓ Queens of the Stone Age - "Suture up my Future."I'm gonna suture up my future, I ain't jaded, I just hate it. See, I been down too long, It's kinda hard to explain. Done and buried all I carried. All my evil is through a needle, As it pull through the eye, What was and what will are now gone.Don't sweat it, Thread it, to forget it. To feel like you've already gone on, To the rest of, The rest of the life that you've got. Take a picture and bury it all away, Bury it all, Away.Tried to fake it, I just can't take it. I don't care if it hurts, Just so long as it's real. I won't waste it, turned to face it, I'd sharpened a knife, then use it, Until bone made it dull. Tried explaining, done explaining, I got caught in the plaid, All of this talking at once. I've been giving my love away, To the things that tear it apart, I'm gonna suture up my future.Thread it, to forget it, To feel like you've already gone on, To the rest of, The rest of the life that you've got, Tie the loose ends and bury it all away, It's like this, It's like this...I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.

How happy is the blameless vessel's lot. The world forgetting by the world forgot. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Each prayer accepted. and each wish resigned.

"At first I was a little worried people were gonna think that I'm a showboat and a little bit of a prick. But then I realized... that's me. I said those things. I did those things. I can live with that."-Steve Zissou

My Interests

Music People watching. Movies. Writing. Reading. Staying up late. The 1960s. The 1950s. The 1940s. Charles Manson. The "Manson" Family. Serial killers. Disney. Pirates. Melody Mae. Princess Blueberry Eureka Miller. Family.

I'd like to meet:

Now that's entertainment!
Your body may be gone.
I'm gonna carry you in. In my head, in my heart, in my soul.
And maybe we'll get lucky and we'll both live again. Well I don't know, I don't know.
I don't know. Don't think so.

Trent Reznor. Stephen King. Severus Snape. Chuck Palahniuk. Jim Carrol. Bruce Campbell. Billy Pilgrim. Charlie Kaufman. V . Hunter S. Thompson. Davy Jones. JK Rowling. Max Fischer. Mark "E" Everett. Thom Yorke. Gary Oldman Aliens (preferabley Tralfamadorians).
really nice people...
My pain is constant and sharp and I do not hope for a better world for anyone, in fact I want my pain to be inflicted on others. I want no one to escape, but even after admitting this there is no catharsis, my punishment continuous to allude me and I gain no deeper knowledge of myself no new knowledge can be extracted from my telling.

This confession has meant nothing."I hate to advocate weird chemicals, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone... but they've always worked for me." - Hunter S. Thompson

Through every forest, above the trees
Within my stomach, scraped off my knees I drink the honey inside your hive
You are the reason I stay alive

Music:

Nine Inch Nails. Deadsy. Mindless Self Indulgence. IMA Robot. 30 Seconds to Mars. Pangolese. Weezer. Incubus. VNV Nation. Radiohead. Scarling. Jack off Jill. The Mars Volta. The Doors. The Cure. Cradle of Filth. Bruce Springsteen. Videodrone. Type O Negative.
The Allman Brothers. Led Zeppelin. Creedence Clearwater Revival. The Moody Blues. Crosby Stills Nash. Saves the Day. Modest Mouse. Dredg. Tom Waits. Roony. Franz Ferdinand. Static-X. Polaris. Saves the Day. Steven Jesse Bernstein. The Dust Brothers. The Forces of Evil. Iron & Wine. The Pixies. Promise Ring. John Mayer. Muse. Oasis Taking Back Sunday. The Beatles. Cat Stevens.
Marilyn Manson. The Vines. Bright Eyes. The Velvet Underground. Charles Manson. The Chemical Brothers. Jeff Buckley. Elliot Smith. FischerSpooner. The Postal Serivce. Orgy. Yanni. Pink Floyd. Dido. Joni Mitchell. Suzanne Vega. The Smashing Pumpkins. Sigur Ros. Beck. Snow Patrol. Tenacious D. The Sounds. Give Impulse. Clint Mansell. Howard Shore. Beethoven.
Bob Dylan. Van Morrison. The Rolling Stones. Jefferson Airplane. Frank Sinatra. Dean Martin. The Shins. Maroon 5. The Polyphonic Spree. . The Eels. Jon Brion. Ray Charles. Travis. Marcy Playground. Cadillac Angels. Dermont Hyde and Tom Hake. Jimi Hendrix. Ryan Adams. Massive Attack. Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds. Frank Zappa. Chris Isaak. H.I.M. The Killers. A Perfect Circle. Ours. The Dresden Dolls. Morphine. David Bowie. The Brian Jonestown Massacre. Dante Esperanza. Skankin' Pickle. Jack Johnson. Death Cab for Cutie. Simon and Garfunkel. Harry and the Potters. The Flaming Lips. Fiona Apple. Psychedelic 60s rock blows my mind.

Movies:

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Donnie Darko. Requiem for a Dream. Fight Club. Ed Wood. Pirates of the Caribbean. From Hell. Don Juan DeMarco. Edward Scissorhands. Sleepy Hollow. Interview with a Vampire. Lord of the Rings trilogy. Big Fish. What's Eating Gilbert Grape. Of Mice and Men. Thirteen. The Lost Highway. Evil Dead series. Party Monster. Being John Malkovich.
The Basketball Diaries. A Clockwork Orange. Vanilla Sky. Red Dragon. Silence of the Lambs. Hannibal. Blow Dry. The Shinning. An Awfully Big Adventure. Galaxy Quest. Pi. Gangster No. 1. Ghost World. Love Actually. Monty Python's The Life of Brian. Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Monty Python's The Meaning of Life. Total Eclipse. Psycho (1960&1998). ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND.
Adaptation. Bubba Hotep. Down by Law. Blow. The Man Who Cried. Box of Moonlight. Rat Race. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. The Royal Tennenbaums. Rushmore. The Salton Sea. The Island of Dr. Moreau. Bowling for Columbine. Girl with a Pearl Earring. Dead Poets Society. Bram Stoker's Dracula. American Psycho. Anchorman:The Legend of Ron Burgundy. A Fish Called Wanda. The Little Mermaid. Sleeping Beauty. The Emperors New Groove. Alice in Wonderland. Beauty and the Beast. The Hunchback of Notre Dame.
The Village. Land of the Dead. Shaun of the Dead. Summer of Sam. Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead. Napoleon Dynamite. Garden State. Lost in Translation. Equilibrium. The Slums of Beverly Hills. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Life According to Garp. Elephant. The Man with the Golden Arm. White Oleander. Session 9. Shakespeare in Love. Ray. Saw. IHuckabees. Closer. The Fifth Element. The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou. A Perfect Murder. Sideways. Basquiat. Immortal Beloved. Prick Up Your Ears. Quills. BBC's The Firm. The Big Lebowski. Nil By Mouth. V For Vendetta . Shop Girl.

Television:

Six Feet Under. Nip/Tuck. The Sopranos. THE OFFICE.

Books:

Fellowship of the Ring. The Two Towers. The Return of the King. The Hobbit. The Silmarillion. Invisible Monsters. Lullaby. Survior. Choke. Fight Club. Diary. The Hanged Man. Violet and Claire. I was a Teenage Fairy. Echo. Wasteland. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.
The Rules of Attraction. Riders on the Storm. The Shining. Dolores Claiborne. The Da Vinci Code. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. What's Eating Gilbert Grape. Angels and Demons. Of Mice and Men. Romeo and Juliet. Disco Bloodbath. The Basketball Diaries. Helter Skelter.
If Chins Could Kill. His Dark Materials. Harry Potter and Order of the Phoenix.. Alice in Wonderland. Through the Looking Glass. White Oleander. Slaughterhouse-Five. Cats Cradle. Dracula. Frankenstein. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. The Great Shark Hunt. V for Vendetta . The Gunslinger. The Drawing of the Three. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. Shop Girl. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater. Breakfast of Champions.

Heroes:

Chuck Palahniuk. The Marquis De Sade. Hunter S. Thompson. Trent Reznor. this man is my hero, my idol. he can have my everything. Tim Curry. Kurt Vonnegut, jr. JK Rowling. My brothers, Ryan, Jordan and Jeffrey. My cousin, Rogie. Muttley. Charlie Kaufman. V . JRR Tolkien. These guys:

My Blog

Crainte

What to do. What to do.I feel numb. I almost miss sadness. I've always missed happiness. There are so many things going on that just feeling one iota of something would satisfy me.I guess I feel one t...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Fri, 09 May 2008 12:51:00 PST

Renvoyé

Everyone hurts in different ways everyday.But today, the last day of 2007, was the largest wound, an emotional a-bomb dropped on my meager existence. The pain I feel right now is irreversible, destroy...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Tue, 01 Jan 2008 11:07:00 PST

Partir

I'm going to be going away for a little while and I'm composing this photo album of sorts and I wanted to include things from my friends. If you just leave a comment saying something nice, that would ...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Tue, 18 Dec 2007 01:16:00 PST

Excès

I'm surviving.or at least trying. Ugh. I feel like every time I get over some sort of barricade, there's another one to get over twice as big as the last.I don't know. I went to the ocean the other d...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Fri, 12 Jan 2007 02:31:00 PST

Rouge

Something intangible. Everything is fake. I can't...feel. I'm lost. It's all around me but it's absolutely no where in sight. I can feel its eyes burning a hole into my back. But when I turn around n...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Thu, 08 Jun 2006 01:42:00 PST

statique

I feel like my brain is full of scratching static. It's all so helter-skelter and I wish it would just stop. I can't stop thinking and I just wish I would. I'm sick of this. I feel so overwhelmed ri...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Sat, 03 Jun 2006 11:26:00 PST

espoir

Things are nice... I go about my daily activities, showering, watching T.V., writing, reading and all the while I keep my cell phone in close proximity to me waiting for a text message to come. It's e...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Mon, 08 May 2006 03:21:00 PST

Le Rêve Américain

I'm sitting and listening to the women of my mother's family in the kitchen talking about married life. Talking about stubborn men of the family and how they are like the men of their family-in-l...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Thu, 04 May 2006 05:56:00 PST

maison

I don't know what HOME is anymore.It used to be my parents' house but since I moved out...I don't feel that security any longer. I don't feel secure anywheres.Always a stranger. Never safe. Sick. Sick...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Sun, 09 Apr 2006 12:13:00 PST

alcoolique

It began with vodka. My first love. Had a kick like a mule in my Gatorade but also caused many a night of love making with the toilet. Still, your name rolls off my tongue and through my fingers in jo...
Posted by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. on Mon, 20 Feb 2006 01:26:00 PST