Lucky von Bastard - ProfilesArchive

About Me

....Sagittarius... Irish. knucklehead & greaser........ i'm a part-time Tattoo & Hot-Rod Convention organizer..... also a journeyman steamfitter/pipefitter.... my company is called Greaser Contracting.... also...!! support my bro Tyson... take a look at his shit too.When i have time i enjoy running over family pets, showing up at nursing homes naked with only a cape, writing letters to your Mom, pushing kids down stairs, spending money on one-eyed prostitutes, autographing vinyl "milk, bread, gas up car, visit Satan.", romancing seniors in the jacuzzi at the YWCA.... etc etc. The list is endless....please understand that any mail you send me will be graded by French judges for grammar and circus midgets for style.I'm not ALWAYS sarcastic.... i just find it takes the attention away from my rotten teeth, hair-loss, club foot, lisp, and hairy back. but then so does the clothing with "tassles" i wear too.i'm all about the details.... the small things.and if you think it's funny to play games or insult me or my girl... then maybe you should think about how funny dental work is on your teeth. because you'll be picking them up with broken fuckin fngers.

My Interests

Vices X tattoos X drinking X honky tonk X Jack Daniels X good ink X hopped up & flat black X rods & customs X old bikes X chicken-shack blues X brass knuckles X Aztec masks X coffin decoration X pin-up art X Mexican wrestling masks X stupid humour X history X Lowbrow shit X Big Daddy Roth, The Pizz, Robert Williams, Coop, Kenny Howard [Von Dutch] [the artist not the hat, fuckface] X LOUD fucking exhausts X road-trips & runaways X skulls & super vixens X greasy live shows X pulling wrenches X garage sales X travelling X words X showering X sleeping X photography.......****************************************** **************************.. ************************************************************ ******** LOW BROW LOW BROW.... ************************************************************ ********..

I'd like to meet:

I got me a hot lil vixen-bombshell that keeps me satisfied..... so don't bother with any stupid shit, ok? I LOVE HER.And what's so fucking hard about sending someone a brief note saying HI before adding them as a friend? shit.

Music:

Don't get me started. Why do you bother telling me EVERY fucking band you like? that's gay...**************************************.."

Movies:

Anything by Wes Anderson, Ken Russell, Russ Meyer, cult shit.... anything with Crispin Glover freaking the FUCK out in it. Frank Mazzoli, Fellini, John Waters, Sergio Leone, Sam Peckinpaw, Abel Ferrara, Brian DePalma, Tarantino, early John Woo [the Killer ~ Hard Boiled]. Needless to say i'm a huge 'film fan'. Blah Blah BLah......

Television:

Charles In Charge. Golden Girls.

Books:

Bukowski, Irvine Welsh, Chuck Palahniuk, HST, Elmore Leonard, Roddy Doyle, Henry Miller..... ......

Heroes:

Big Daddy Roth

My Blog

These are the days of my LIFE.

WARNING: THIS IS PROBABLY USELESS SHIT YOU WOULD NEVER NORMALLY WANT TO KNOW ABOUT ME. 1. Would you chew gum after someone else already has?only if it was stuck under a bench at a bus stop in F...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Tue, 27 Mar 2007 12:23:00 PST

i miss the gym.

...you ever go to a gym to work out? i used to, but i've been slacking lately. like for the past 2-3 years. i remember one of the funniest things that ever happened to me at a gym..... he was a fuckin...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Wed, 06 Dec 2006 12:16:00 PST

...growing as a person

...you know what I never really grasped? ...what they meant when doctors said people who lose a limb often feel a pain where their arm or leg once was. it didn't make any sense to me. how is that poss...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Tue, 05 Dec 2006 12:01:00 PST

Calgary Tattoo & Arts Festival 2006....

hey there folks..... here's a few of the things we have in store for you at this year's Calgary Tattoo & Arts Festival 2006.... Kat Von D will be at the showing doing portrait tattoo work...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Tue, 30 May 2006 04:10:00 PST

the nostalgic paradigm...

Bear with me here...... i feel the overwhelmning need to rant. I've been feeling nostalgic. Of course nostalgia is a fond yearning for times you didn't really live through, or you wouldn't have a fond...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

A to Z of Lucky.

A - Age you got your first kiss: i have still never been kissed. i am a virgin kisser. i have, however had multiple anal orgies with cheerleaders & stewardesses all around the world. even a bearded la...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

i heart fashion.

Fashion! Hooray! Clothing and Accessories! The wealthy people get odd hats and chinos (the work pants of yore), and the poor people get gold teeth and $200 sneakers. I dont even know what fashion is ...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Life's Unanswered Questions

Life's Unanswered Questions How do you throw away a garbage can? Why in baseball is it called the World Series if it is only played in the U.S.A? Why do old men have hair in their ears? Why a...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

drug war ends in huge success

DRUG WAR ENDS IN HUGE SUCCESS Body: Theres a headline youll never see, unless its Backwards Day (which I am still trying to get Congress to officially recognize). Unfortunately, the War on Drugs ...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Obscenity??

Here we go again......... obscenity has once again reared its ugly head like a massive, rock-hard cock. The question is to what degree people in power shall decide what's acceptable for the public to ...
Posted by Lucky von Bastard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST