stanley profile picture

stanley

you want A REAL AMERICAN IDOL? then Kiss THIS baby...

About Me

you know people, i TRY to be the best lover, musician, writer, actor, greatest guitarist in the world (which i am by the way) so if you got any complaints then send 'em on up to my penthouse suite with a high-heeled blonde and a bottle of the finest champagne and maybe we can talk about it when i am not too BUSY.....if ya know what i mean...and people, i think ya know what i mean.

My Interests

being the greatest guitarist of all time, having more gold albums than ANY U.S. artist EVER because if you know you have a core audience of crazy, crazy wild animals then you can put out tons of albums and they will all lick 'em up, all the time. i also enjoy cooking (oh i love eggs), my daily pilates, acting, shopping for stuff like bedspreads and wicker, my press clippings, getting cool discounts on guitar strings any time i want, leather, fowarding friends helpful emails like all the great things we can do to keep the beautiful city of New York clean and vibrant and also how everyone can help keep Ace the hell away from my building.

I'd like to meet:

blondes in high heels, Elvis, Robert Plant, Abba, Frank Stallone, Ron Popeil, the two Olsen Twins if they're 18 but really just the one with more meat on her bones, Roy Wood, Michael Bruce, Liza, Mary Reily, Rudy Giulianni, Oscar Wilde, Robin Quivers, Paul Dinello, Ivanka Trump (call me!), Martha Stewart, Warhol (does he get out much?), Karl Lagerfeld, the Donnas, Oprah, all my fans, Chaim Witz and of course, The Phantom.

Music:

The Move, Slade, Beatles, Led Zeppelin, The Rasberries, NY Dolls, Stones, T Rex, Suzi Quatro, Angel, Rod Stewart, the Faces, Celine Dione, Whitney, Alice Cooper, Mandy Moore, Desmond Child, The Dictators, Cher, Wicked Lester, Hillary Duff, the Spiders From Mars, Marvin Hamlish, Foghat, Sinatra, Glass Tiger, T.A.T.U., Roxette, Burt Bacharach and whoever did that song, "boom boom let's go back to my room"....?

Movies:

The Phantom (of the park)

Television:

Kojack, the L Word, Emeril, Passions, VH 1, Playboy After Hours, Joey, That 70's Show, Ebert and Roeper

Books:

no time to read, too busy bein' ME

Heroes:

Robert Plant, Jimmy Page, my shrinks, Don Knotts, Roy Horn, Agnes Moorhead, Lennon/McCartney

My Blog

Tower Records may as well be closed

so i'm hangin' here with a couple UCLA-student blondes i met at some club after they asked if i can i can introduce them to Nick Simmons (whoever that is??) so i said "yeah, whatever" and a hop, ...
Posted by stanley on Thu, 17 May 2007 01:14:00 PST

Now where the hell's my gardener?

Y'know i pay people well, people, but today i come outside to find my front lawn as dry as Utah on a Tuesday.  Where's my damned gardeners???   Hell, i may as well hire Ace for the gig....
Posted by stanley on Mon, 01 May 2006 02:18:00 PST

April Fools message for EVERYONE...

ya know what PISSES me off, people?this April Fools Day 2006.... now here comes ANOTHER holiday but they never tell us who the hell to buy for, where to celebrate, what dessert's to expect, NOTHIN' ! ...
Posted by stanley on Sat, 01 Apr 2006 02:30:00 PST

welcome to the third world...do i still have to tip?

AW-YAY-UH!  y'know,  i take pretty good care of Myself people, so yesterday it was about time to get just a little bit o' work done on the nails and my man Kashim said he was busy over in En...
Posted by stanley on Mon, 06 Feb 2006 07:00:00 PST

jaywalkin' and jivetalkin'

you know somethin' boys an' girls, if ya wanna talk to me then FINE but leave the confusion with Beck or Joan Baez or one of those PETA-pushin' pill poppin' sorry assholes ok? i was walkin' down the S...
Posted by stanley on Mon, 14 Nov 2005 06:07:00 PST

Mr. Softy

ya know people, i love getting messages from all over but SOMETIMES i think y'all on drugs! i got a message from Connie in Nebraska (wherever that is) and i quote: "WANTED TO KNOW WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORI...
Posted by stanley on Mon, 10 Oct 2005 06:10:00 PST

so many questions so little IQ...

ya know people, i was thinkin'.... Gilligan died but how'd they find him because he was on that damn island. you gettin' this? and why does every jackass at Office Depot take an hour getting my card a...
Posted by stanley on Sat, 08 Oct 2005 03:40:00 PST

99 cent store, you GOTTA be kidding me...

ya know, i was out driving 'round town and after going to Beverly Center for my face cream (the Grove is a no-no after some nutty bitch backed into my Jag and then put a Hatian curse on me...whatever ...
Posted by stanley on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST