Luthian profile picture

Luthian

Beauty slander'd with a Bastard shame...that every tongue says Beauty should look so

About Me


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"This world of ours is not as it seems. The monsters are real, but they're not in your dreams. Learn what you can from the beasts you defeat, you'll need it for some of the people you meet." - Voltaire "goodnight, demon slayer"I am a gypsy butterfly who's wings have been clipped, and are now growing back, and rather nicely if I do say so myself. I'm like a fairy...easily distracted by pretty or shiney objects for short amounts of time. But narry impossibly to catch or keep. I love life, and bright colors, and the outdoors, and nature...yet I am strangly and all too obsessivly drawn towards the beauty in the darkness...the things that bump back in the night. I am told I come on too strong, yet I am truely more gentle than a kitten. I forgive easily until you've wronged me one to many times, then you will never be forgiven again, nor will I ever look back. I am plowing through a beautifully painful process I am currently calling "ascending my throne". I am very sensual. I tend to be submissive, though I prefer to be an equal. I enjoy being loved, I abhore being lusted after. If you cannot see the person I am on the inside (or prefer not to take the time) then don't bother looking at my human costume. I believe eyes are the window to the soul, and mine are always open for the reading. I believe that this physical world we all can see is a trivial part of our existance, the spiritual realm is where the real truth lies. I despise people who only see things in black & white. Life is a grey scale and if you see things only as black or white you only ever see half the truth. I have morals, but I am not a christian. I love animals, but I also eat them. My greatest joy in life is my children, and I will defend and protect them mercilessly. I love to be seen, yet I all to often hide. I am generally an optimist, yet all to often much to sad. My mother says I'm stronger than she could ever hope to be. I know I'm strong, but only on the inside. When I was a child I always fancied myself the knight in shining armour rescuing the damsel in distress, now I find myself just as often being the knight in tattered armour wishing for my damsel to come save me. I used to be a masochist, but I'm all better now. Once a person goes through an indescribable level of pain they realize they don't want to hurt anymore. I like to spoil my lover, and wish them to honor me in that way as well. I'm stubborn as hell when I choose to be, show me in a passive manor why I should not be and I will change my mind. I like to see how far and hard I can push myself, then I push myself a little farther. I have yet to learn how to not be self-sacrificing. I fancy myself a poet. I'm told I'm a narcissist, I'm told I have an extreem martyr complex...I think people see what they want. I have healthy enough self esteem to appreciate some of my better qualities. I tend to over work myself for others, especially those I care about. Want to know more? Just wait, my life is an open book, take the time and nothing will be hidden from you. Which Mythological Form Are You?
You are Form 3, Unicorn: The Innocent."And The Unicorn knew she wasn't meant to go into the Dark Wood. Disregarding the advice given to her by the spirits, Unicorn went inside and bled silver blood.. For her misdeed, the world knew evil."Some examples of the Unicorn Form are Eve (Christian) and Pandora (Greek).The Unicorn is associated with the concept of innocence, the number 3, and the element of water. Her sign is the twilight sun.As a member of Form 3, you are a curious individual. You are drawn to new things and become fascinated with ideas you've never come in contact with before. Some people may say you are too nosey, but it's only because you like getting to the bottom of things and solving them. Unicorns are the best friends to have because they are inquisitive.
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My Interests

What Emotion Are You?
You are Beauty.You are beautiful, whether it be on the inside, the outside, or both. People are drawn to you as strongly as you are drawn to the beauty in the world around you.
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I'd like to meet:

People that have intensity in their eyes. You know the type, they merely glance in your direction and you feel as though they can see into your very soul. As far as celebrities, they're overated. It's the "little people" who carry society on their broken backs...The greatest people in this world are those who get no recognition for their efforts but keep doing it anyway. I want to meet people who live with honor and follow their heart. I adore people who take their destiny by the balls and form it to their will. Travelers are awesome people...the world needs more gypsies and pirates. Creative artist make me happy, imaginative people are amazing...Those are the types of people that are actually worth spending time with/on.http://www.religioustolerance.org/goth.htm

You are The Empress

Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.

The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents, beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.

The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.

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Music:


I can never think of what I like when I'm trying to write these things. I like celtic and "new age" music such as Loreena McKennit, Sarah McLaughlin, and Enigma. I like industrial music such as Rammstein, and Das Ich (yes if it's German it's gotta be good). I like a fare share of "radio bands" especially the "feminists" like Tori Amos and Alainis Morrisette (no I don't consider either of them to be feminist, but I've been told they are). I also enjoy classic gothic music (of which all bands currently escape my brain) dance, and unique, off the wall stuff...oh, and one can't forget "world" music. I'll add them as I think of themThe Mummers Dance

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Movies:

"Drinking coffee is like having sex. It's the erotic enjoyment of allowing what you are focusing on to fill all of your sences" --Me

Television:

"A free woman in an unfree society will be a monster." --Angela Carter

Books:

Shakespeare's Sonnet 127if it were, it bore not beauty's name; But now is black beauty's successive heir, And beauty slander'd with a bastard shame: For since each hand hath put on nature's power, Fairing the foul with art's false borrow'd face, Sweet beauty hath no name, no holy bower, But is profaned, if not lives in disgrace. Therefore my mistress' brows are raven black, Her eyes so suited, and they mourners seem at such who, not born fair, no beauty lack, Slandering creation with a false esteem: Yet so they mourn, becoming of their woe, That every tongue says beauty should look so.

Heroes:

My Children, VASHTI, Joan of Arc, Salome, Cleopatra, Loreena McKennitt, Me, Suzanna Keyson, Suriyothai, Fred Rogers, All those nameless faceless people throughout history who've dared to stand up against the norm

My Blog

Senceless quiz

ripped from Goth Kitty Jen, Thanx doll ;)   First Name? By birth: not telling.  By choice: Luthian Named after anyone? Luthian from J.R.R. Tolkiens The Silmarillion, http://en.wiki...
Posted by Luthian on Sat, 24 May 2008 06:01:00 PST

emotional maelstrom

So I was thinking today.  In life we rarely have to deal with the consequences of the emotional trauma we inflict on others, that is usually left for the one after you to deal with and pick up th...
Posted by Luthian on Wed, 30 Apr 2008 06:17:00 PST

My Birthday

I had an amazing birthday this year!  MEAT on thursday (my actual bday the 17th), not too many people I invited showed up, but that meant I was able to concentrate on the few close friends t...
Posted by Luthian on Tue, 22 Apr 2008 01:20:00 PST

Femininety

So I’m curious what your definition of femininety is.  I will get the ball rolling with mine.  I feel true femininety is having subtle strength, so those around you don’t even co...
Posted by Luthian on Wed, 19 Mar 2008 12:12:00 PST

How to Wrend your heart

I LOVE YOU!  I see you loving that who is not me, I see me stuck in my obsession over you.  My best laid plans, dreams of a day that could have never been.  Not yet able to kill all ho...
Posted by Luthian on Wed, 13 Feb 2008 07:51:00 PST

my relationship personality type

The "copy this for your blog" shit isn't working, so I'm posting the text and pic below, and the link if anyone is interested in seeing all of it or taking the test themselves http://www.okcupid....
Posted by Luthian on Tue, 15 Jan 2008 06:40:00 PST

Sorrow

The dictionary defines sorrow as: Distress caused by loss, affliction, dissapointment, etc; grief, sadness, or regret.  To feel sorrow; greive.  Mental suffering or pain caused by injury, lo...
Posted by Luthian on Thu, 03 Jan 2008 07:14:00 PST

Christmas

So on the evening of December 17th I fell ill with a flu, complete with a fever of 103.  My deranged lil family had decieded to celebrate yule because I was being abandonded by everyone...
Posted by Luthian on Thu, 27 Dec 2007 02:03:00 PST

a year ago today

A year ago today was Azraels 5 month birthday, it was also the day she was hospitalized with the diagnosis "failure to thrive".  She waighed 11 pounds 2 ounces, only a 2lb 10oz gain from her birt...
Posted by Luthian on Wed, 28 Nov 2007 04:51:00 PST

to love the bi-polar goddess

I look at you and smile, all things beautiful rest within your endless eyes.  I say I love you, you say you love me too.  We walk together and talk of the future, all is right with the ...
Posted by Luthian on Mon, 19 Nov 2007 11:58:00 PST