I was born on a warm September morning in Louisville, Kentucky, at a tailgate in a church parking lot before the University of Kentucky/University of Louisville football game. In addition to a blend of tomato-based products, Lea & Perrins Worchestershire Sauce, Tabasco, Pickapeppa Sauce, and celery salt, I contained celery, pickled okra, hot pickled asparagus and green beans, jalapeno-stuffed olives, black pepper, lemon and lime juice, and vodka.
While the tailgate ultimately ended, and Tuesday drank all of me that day, I live on in the memory of the few who tasted me as hands-down the greatest Bloody Mary the world has ever seen. Seriously. It's not even close.
Not only that, but I, like the man who created me, don't use the word "hero" lightly, or often. Nonetheless, all who witnessed the sheer skill, indomitable force of will, and painstaking artisinal craftsmanship by which I was wrought that day join me in proclaiming that my creator was, on September 5, 2004, the Greatest Hero in American History.
Also, I supported Butch Cassidy in his time of need when Harvey challenged him for leadership of The Hole in the Wall Gang (especially after he defeated him).