Some bullshit to think about before hitting the road this summer |
Missing radio antenna = Missing gas cap + vanilla air freshenerPurple cars = blinker left on for 8 minutes (or 8 miles; which ever's first)Duct tape tail light repair = "How You Like Me Now?" windshie...
Posted by JC on Tue, 05 Jun 2007 09:38:00 PST |
How to intimidate me |
Cut the tips off your gloves.Nothing says "tough" to melike a motherfucker in a pair of those three-quarter jobbies.I see cut-off gloves and I think;"that guy may not be tough,but fuck it, I'm crossin...
Posted by JC on Tue, 20 Mar 2007 09:08:00 PST |
Random Members of the Business Community |
...
Posted by JC on Wed, 28 Feb 2007 09:24:00 PST |
Why... |
...do people sit on cake?
...
Posted by JC on Wed, 14 Feb 2007 11:17:00 PST |
My spec script for The Sarah Silverman Program |
An excerpt. They'll probably buy it.The waiting room of an OBGYN. SARAH is looking cute in one of those puffy vests. She's eating something childish, like a pretzel dog. An OLD BLACK WOMAN sits ne...
Posted by JC on Fri, 02 Feb 2007 01:59:00 PST |
Chinatown, '81 |
At nine years, I finally wandered into the infinite space beyond my lunch box. I remember the day because the father had come home and we were rolling over the Williamsburg Bridge in a brand new car....
Posted by JC on Thu, 25 Jan 2007 09:38:00 PST |
The thing with soup |
What is it about the act of eating soup that makes one seem so feeble? I can be in perfect health, yet something about hunching over a bowl and blowing on a spoon makes me feel sort of pitiful. I im...
Posted by JC on Wed, 10 Jan 2007 06:47:00 PST |
Vegetable of the year |
Swiss fucking chard.
Posted by JC on Wed, 10 Jan 2007 06:44:00 PST |
Portions of the lexicon that I've become impatient with |
A snappy term emerges in a New Yorker essay. It rings nicely in the ear of a New York Times writer. A producer at NPR gets a whiff and the vocable begins coursing wildly through the linguistics circ...
Posted by JC on Thu, 14 Dec 2006 07:34:00 PST |
The war on christmas is over. I lost. |
One of my four jobs while attending art school was at Radio City Music Hall. I operated the stage elevator for the Christmas Spectacular. This seemed to fit nicely into the master-plan; get to know ...
Posted by JC on Tue, 12 Dec 2006 01:38:00 PST |
