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TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Read the answers - If you know me, it's all there; if you don't why does it matter?
Birthday: That's a secret known to few
Birthplace: Glasgow
Current Location: Glasgow
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: Dunno - hair colour?
Height: 5'11''
Right Handed or Left Handed: Sinister
Your Heritage: Nordic-North British (there no evidence that the Celts were ever resident in the British or North Atlantic Isles)
The Shoes You Wore Today: Today I wore no shoes
Your Weakness: Booze of any sort
Your Fears: That I'll die before seeing the end of everyone else.
Your Perfect Pizza: Meat Meat Meat and Jalapinos
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: To be feared throughout the land
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: I've never used an instant messenger
Thoughts First Waking Up: Shit, what time do I start? And what time is it? And where am I? Followed by a serene feeling of not giving a fuck
Your Best Physical Feature: My limbs, my hair and beard
Your Bedtime: Depends on what I'm doing - generally between 1 am and 4 am
Your Most Missed Memory: Having everything I ever wanted, or the easy possibility of having anything further. (sorry that's so cryptic, but this is really a sore point with me)
Pepsi or Coke: Don't care about such things
MacDonalds or Burger King: Usually neither, but Burger King if I had to choose
Single or Group Dates: What the hell does this mean?
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: If you're gonna have tea - have it bastarding hot; if you want a cold drink, just fucking drink water
Chocolate or Vanilla: Both
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee
Do you Smoke: Muchly
Do you Swear: Do I fuck. I have formed profanity, blasphemy and gross biologism into an artform, you bloated boil-ridden bag of bastards pumping putrifying proto-children into the colon of the Christ. Swear, Indeed!
Do you Sing: Much along the same lines as I swear
Do you Shower Daily: Yes, often more than once a day
Have you Been in Love: Yes
Do you want to go to College: I went to University
Do you want to get Married: I did, for a long time (see two questions ago).
Do you belive in yourself: "Belive?" You really are a retard. If I don't "belive" in myself, you all don't exist
Do you get Motion Sickness: No
Do you think you are Attractive: No, I know it
Are you a Health Freak: No
Do you get along with your Parents: Yup, mostly
Do you like Thunderstorms: Yes I fucking do!!!!
Do you play an Instrument: Yup
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Extreme amounts
In the past month have you Smoked: Yes
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Nope
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Don't think so
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Don't geez yer "Mall" shit. Naw.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Whilst Oreos are indeed fine, I have not ever eaten a box of said sweet delights
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Fish do not feel pain and I have a personal policy of not eating anything that can't feel pain.
In the past month have you been on Stage: Yup
In the past month have you been Dumped: Not in the last month, no.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: If you take away the requirement for a body of water for this, then yes I have. If the water is essential, I've certainly had a shower
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No that I can remember
Ever been Drunk: Fuck yes
Ever been called a Tease: Certainly
Ever been Beaten up: Been in fights, if that counts.
Ever Shoplifted: Dunno
How do you want to Die: In a spectacular fashion
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Something where you get to rule with an iron fist, showing mercy to none.
What country would you most like to Visit: Anywhere in Scandinavia
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Any
Favourite Hair Color: Variable
Short or Long Hair: Long, definitely long
Height: Don't mind as long as not freakishly tall or short
Weight: No-one so thin I could break, no KFC junkies either
Best Clothing Style: Army Surplus, anything evil-looking - no sportswear, that makes you look like a fool
Number of Drugs I have taken: Define drug - almost everything contains at least one drug.
Number of CDs I own: I don't know - I acquire them at a silly rate and I don't know how.
Number of Piercings: None
Number of Tattoos: Will be 3 in 48 hours
Number of things in my Past I Regret: One
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
Forever burn, never to die,
An ebony flame, a sun infernal
Disorder Rating
Paranoid Disorder : Very High
Schizoid Disorder : High
Schizotypal Disorder : High
Antisocial Disorder : High
Borderline Disorder : Moderate
Histrionic Disorder : Moderate
Narcissistic Disorder : High
Avoidant Disorder : High
Dependent Disorder : Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder : High
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --
-- Personality Disorders --
Surely none of that can possibly be right - that would make me the most fucked up person ever. And I'm sure that you can't actually have all of these. Ah well, shit tests make me laugh. Like where you play that game at the hospital trying to get them to do tests on dog turds and they tell you that you're really ill and have worms. Then you laugh and run away. Still laughing. Cause you gave them someone else's name.
