Sam profile picture

Sam

I know for certain the yacht club would have a problem with it

About Me

I wish I could write a song that people gathered to sing in the dining room of a cruise ship, but I know, given that one of my greatest passions is collecting news stories about animals attacking humans, it's doubtful.

My Interests

Eyelashes and Coffee and Compulsive, ritualistic behaviors. Suits. Mumbling. Girls who detest Molly Jong-Fast. Avoiding jeans. Finding chemical solutions to spiritual problems. Watching a sickening amount of Cinema. Maintaining certain disciplines. Picking at my pocket lining. Binding the acceptable to the absolutely unacceptable. And Women who became bored by Bukowski...

I'd like to meet:

Scotch drinkers. Grief tourists. Women agonised by emotional frailties. Crisis merchants. Alprazolam distributors. Fans of “Bringing Up Baby.” Anyone who feels intensely slighted by events that, in reality, had very little to do with them. No one from Random House. Someone involved in the breeding of Finches. People who strap their toddlers into harnesses when they take them down on the street. People who get dressed up to go to the coffee shop. Another girl that feels let down by the rehabilitation industry. People who waste big money on pretentious magazines. Women who hang out at the cinema in the early afternoon and have no use for their wombs. Individuals who feel menaced by certain large structures. Moloch worshippers. Chain-smokers. Analysts that may or may not have recently grown bored of something. People who can’t quite shake the far-off suspicion that the supermarket is haunted. People who plan to rent forever. City dwellers having conversations dominated by lines like, “I don’t care” or “I really don’t have much of an opinion on that.” Lawyers who might by sympathetic to the plight of a writer being unnecessarily harassed over expense payments. Bath-timers. People that have contemplated ordering a Cosmopolitan, but then decided not to. Women interested in the lives of the Saints. Lackadaisical neurotics. Worn down catholics. Readers intrigued by aesthetic frivolity. People who attempt to buttress the argument about the severity of their problems by saying, “But I only ever snorted it.” People who forgot to put their mittens on or have been blacklisted by certain unforgiving airlines. People who waste entire days in art galleries, or staring at a type of flower swaying pointlessly in a breeze. Discredited character witnesses and despondent young females wearing pretty hats and doctors that can avoid looking strangely at you when you tell them you have a heart attack each morning. Slinky Vogue dolls and various interesting dogs and all the people I knew who stopped mainlining smack, relocated to France and built studios in disused barns that happened to be sitting on their just purchased properties.

Music:


Springsteen ..
Leonard Cohen
Nick Cave
Tindersticks
Bob Dylan
Johnny Cash
PJ Harvey
Patti Page
The Silver Jews
Elvis Presley
Bobby Darin
Calexico
Cat Power
Smog
Sufjan Stevens
Warren Zevon
Joanna Newsom
The Handsome Family
Wilco
Au Revoir Simone
The National
Sigur Rós
These lists quickly bore me, so feel free to just imagine who the other 10,000 names might be.

Television:


Twin Peaks
The Sopranos
Deadwood
Seinfeld
Curb Your Enthusiasm
John From Cincinnati
Arrested Development
The Wire
The Shield
The End

Books:


James Joyce
Don DeLillo
Joan Didion
Albert Camus
Philip Roth
Thomas McGuane
Flaubert
Bret Easton Ellis
Hemingway
Donna Tartt
Francoise Sagan
Anaïs Nin
Paul Auster
Murakami
William Burroughs
Updike
Vonnegut
Michel Houellebecq
Virginia Woolf
This is another list that could become very long and pointless.

My Blog

Middle

And then it abruptly gets warm, and I don't know quite what to make of it. My barber gets into an argument with the man who works the second chair, and ends up attacking him with a pair of scissors, ...
Posted by Sam on Sat, 24 May 2008 01:55:00 PST

Ordinary Flowers

The miniature chandelier is interesting, the television hasn’t worked since we smashed it. Topics of discussion brought up in the living room are promptly and routinely dismissed. We do most of ...
Posted by Sam on Sat, 29 Mar 2008 09:36:00 PST

"Living Well Is The Best Revenge."

The first tuesday back in England, I decide, grudgingly, to go and see Jade. Partly because I’ve just heard the thirty-eight, increasingly shrill messages she has left on my machine while I was ...
Posted by Sam on Mon, 17 Mar 2008 04:34:00 PST

Get Along, Little Sheep.

Five weeks of deep stupor. Constantly pushing the Open/Close button on the dvd remote, watching the disc tray move in and out, until it eventually just gives up and refuses to play the game anymore. T...
Posted by Sam on Tue, 26 Feb 2008 04:27:00 PST

"Son, we’re lucky in this town, it’s a beautiful place to be born."

The city is filled with people moving around stupidly, milling up and down the streets with no apparent purpose, and it's aggravating to realise I'm one of them ... Why did I order chicken breasts wra...
Posted by Sam on Thu, 17 Jan 2008 06:38:00 PST

"Mid-Fours"

"When travelling on business in Germany, you hear Hungry Heart by Bruce Springsteen in a lot of elevators." My agent informs me, over an afternoon phone line that's beginning to crackle slightly."I'm ...
Posted by Sam on Tue, 18 Dec 2007 03:01:00 PST

Dinner Party.

The Christmas tree was hung with black tinsel and old beer bottle caps tied with blue string. We were all up on the fourteenth floor. There was no smoking in the apartment, Natalie told me, more than ...
Posted by Sam on Sun, 09 Dec 2007 03:36:00 PST

reindeer

And you said, more than once, how you couldn't understand why people preferred the American version of The Ring to the original Japanese. You said this in a chain restaurant, while eating egg rolls an...
Posted by Sam on Sat, 17 Nov 2007 11:49:00 PST

Wonderful Life.

October 31st - I'm wide awake at three in the morning. Restless. Something unnamable on my mind. There's a bottle of sleeping pills on the bedside table, but given the dreams I've had recently (Kate W...
Posted by Sam on Mon, 05 Nov 2007 04:36:00 PST

Dry Bones

A woman I once slept with died recently. There was something wrong with her brain. The fluid had become infected. Various treatments proved ineffective. Tears undoubtedly rolled as doctors shook their...
Posted by Sam on Wed, 17 Oct 2007 04:41:00 PST