K. Korry Smith, Esq. profile picture

K. Korry Smith, Esq.

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

About Me

"Memory's so treacherous. One moment you're lost in a carnival of delights, with poignant childhood aromas, the flashing neon of sentimental candyfloss... the next, it leads you somewhere you don't want to go... somewhere dark and cold, filled with the damp, ambiguous shapes of things you'd hoped were forgotten. Memories can be vile, repulsive little brutes. Like children, I suppose. HAHA. But can we live without them? Memories are what our reason is based upon. If we can't face them, we deny reason itself! Although, why not? We aren't contractually tied down to reality! There is no sanity clause! So when you find yourself locked onto an unpleasant train of thought, heading for the places in your past where the screaming is unbearable, remember there's always madness. Madness is the emergency exit... you can just step outside, and close the door on all those dreadful things that happened. You can lock them away... forever."

"I don't really come from outer space, it's a condition of mental divergence. I find myself on the planet Ogo, part of an intellectual elite prepared to subjugate the barbarian hordes on Pluto. But even though this is a totally convincing reality for me in every way, nevertheless, Ogo is actually a construct of my psyche. I am mentally divergent, in that I am escaping certain unnamed realities that plague my life here. When I stop going there, I will be well. Are you also divergent, friend?"

My Interests

50's pin up art, adrew vachss, anime, candle-lit baths, cartoons, comics, edgar allan poe, frank miller, glabrous castor canadensis, graphic design, green eyes, gregory mcdonald, guitars, harry potter, hellboy, horror movies, interracial smurf porn, j.k. rowling, jd robb, jive talk, laurell k. hamilton, live music, michael moore, movies, muppets, music, neil gaiman, original artwork, peter bagge, photography, pink parts, porcelain skin, preacher, psychotic clowns, rain, religious history, richard matheson, rob zombie, running with scissors, satan, screenprinting, stephen lynch, strippers, superman, vampires, vintage erotica, web design, zombies

I'd like to meet:

.. freaks.. weirdos.. misfits.. my younger self..

.. Katherine Heigl.. Pauley Perrette.. Kari Byron..

.. Emma Watson.. Brody Dalle.. Shannon Elizabeth..

.. Zooey Deschanel.. Joanna Angel.. Kat Von D..

.. Jennifer Love Hewitt.. Sarah Silverman.. Michelle Ryan..

.. Helen Mirren.. Diablo Cody.. Jenna Fischer..



Music:

Aerosmith, Alanis Morissette, Alice Cooper, Ani DiFranco, Anthrax, Art Alexakis, Asylum Street Spankers, Barenaked Ladies, Beach Boys, Beatles, Betty Blowtorch, Black Crows, Black Sabbath (w/Ozzy only), Bloodhound Gang, Bloodrock, Blue October, Blue Öyster Cult, Bob Dylan, Bob Schneider, Bon Jovi, Boston, Bowling for Soup, Brian Vander Ark, Buckcherry, Butthole Surfers, Cinderella, Circle Jerks, Colorfinger, Concrete Blonde, the Cure, Dangerous Toys, Deep Purple, Distillers, Everclear, Extreme, Faster Pussycat, Foo Fighters, Grand Funk Railroad, Green Day, Guns N Roses (not that new crap Axl's trying to pull off), Guster, Ian Moore, Iggy & the Stooges, INXS, Izzy Stradlin, James Gang, James Taylor, Jane's Addiction, Jessica Simpson (on mute), Jethro Tull, Jimi Hendrix, Joan Jett & the Blackhearts, John Cougar Mellencamp, John Williams, Johnny Cash, Johnny Thunders, K's Choice, Kansas, Kiss, LA Guns, Lily Allen, Liz Phair, Marilyn Manson, Mary Prankster, Misfits, morningwood, Neil Young, New York Dolls, Nine Inch Nails, Nirvana, Nixons, NOFX, Nuno, Ookla the Mok, Plain White Ts, Poison, Prince (terribly underrated as a guitarist), Queen, Ramones, Refreshments, Rick Springfield, Rob Zombie, Rolling Stones, RUN DMC, Sarah Bettens, Scabs, Scatterbrain, Sex Pistols, Sly & the Family Stone, Somebody's Closet, Soul Asylum, Soundgarden, Steamroller, Stephen Lynch, Stevie Ray Vaughan, Stone Temple Pilots, Stray Cats, Styx, Tenacious D, Tesla, Thin Lizzy, Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers, Tori Amos, Ugly Americans, Velvet Revolver, Violent Femmes, Weezer, White Zombie, Who, Willie Nelson, Z, Zac Maloy.. spinning a disc and remixing something someone else created does not make one a musician.. learn to play a fucking instrument!

Movies:

12 Angry Men, 28 Days Later, The 40 Year Old Virgin, The Abyss, Alice, All the President's Men, American Splendor, Anchorman, Asswoman in Wonderland, Batman Begins, Blade Runner, Blazing Saddles, The Blues Brothers, Bowling for Columbine, Braveheart, The Breakfast Club, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Can't Buy Me Love, Cars, Charlie & the Chocolate Factory, Clerks, Clerks 2, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Cool Hand Luke, Crash, The Crow, The Dark Crystal, Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid, The Devil's Rejects, Dogma, DreamQuest, Dreamscape, E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, Edward Scissorhands, Elephant, Elf, Enemy Mine, Evil Dead, Fallen, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Fight Club, Garden State, Ghostbusters, Good Will Hunting, The Goonies, Grease, Hard-Boiled, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Harry Potter and the Order of th Phoenix, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, Heathers, Hellboy, House of 1000 Corpses, House of D, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, Inherit the Wind, It's a Wonderful Life, Ivy Manor, Jaws, Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back, The Jerk, Jersey Girl (fuck off), JFK, Juno, Kill Bill, The Kiss, Knocked Up, The Last Starfighter, Legend, Let My Puppets Come, Life as a House, Little Manhattan, Little Miss Sunshine, The Longest Yard (the original), The Lord of the Rings, Mallrats, The Muppet Movie, Mystery Men, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, National Lampoon's Vacation, The Neverending Story, Night of the Comet, No Country for Old Men, Office Space, Old School, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Orgy of the Dead, The Other Sister, The Others, Planet of the Apes (not that Tim Burton crap), Pretty in Pink, Pulp Fiction, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Rain Man, Reservoir Dogs, The Right Stuff, Satyr, SE7EN, Shrek, Sid & Nancy, Sin City, Sixteen Candles, Sky High, St. Elmo's Fire, Stand By Me, Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back, Superman: The Movie, Superman II, Superman Returns, Tank Girl, Team America World Police, They Live, To Kill a Mockingbird, True Romance, ALL classic Universal horror films, The Usual Suspects, The Virgin Suicides, Wedding Crashers, Weird Science, What's Eating Gilbert Grape, Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory, Young Frankenstein

Television:

30 Rock, The Adventures of Superman, Angel, Batman: the Animated Series, Battlestar Gallactica, The Big Bang Theory, Bionic Woman, Boondocks, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, C.S.I., Cheers, Chuck, The Colbert Report, Cowboy Bebop, Dead Like Me, Desperate Housewives, Dirty Jobs, Everybody Hates Chris, The Greatest American Hero, Grey's Anatomy, Heroes, Jekyll, Justice League Unlimited, Kid Nation, Kyle XY, Law & Order: SVU, Little House on the Prarie, M*A*S*H, Medium, Mr. Show, The Muppet Show, My Name is Earl, MythBusters, The Office, Quantam Leap, Reaper, Saturday Night Live, Scrubs, Seinfeld, Smallville, Teen Titans Go

Books:

Adrew Vachss (Burke), Laurell K. Hamilton (Anita Blake), Gregory McDonald (Fletch), Peter Bagge (Hate), Edgar Allan Poe, Warren Ellis (Transmetropolitan).. Dark Knight Returns, Hellboy, Preacher, Downsize This! Random Threats from an Unarmed American, Stupid White Men... and Other Sorry Excuses for the State of the Nation!, Dude, Where's My Country?, Vampire$, I Am Legend, Neil Gaiman's Sandman, J.D. Robb's "Eve Dallas" novels, "Angels & Demons" and "The da Vinci Code" by Dan Brown, post-Crisis Superman, Herobear & the Kid.

Heroes:

Patsy Smith & Geraldine Farve, my grandmothers who raised 6 & 4 kids on their own after being abandoned by their husbands.. George Carlin for finding humor in the stupidity of this world.. Michael Moore for having the balls to speak out against everything we wish we could.. Christopher Reeve, the real Superman.. Jack the Ripper & DB Cooper for never getting caught.. Fred Rogers for caring.Fuck: George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld, John Ashcroft, Usama bin Laden, Prince Bandar bin Sultan, Ariel Sharon, Ehud Olmert, Tom DeLay, Karl Rove, and Kim Chong-il.

My Blog

Brads Eulogy - Brad Meltzer's MySpace Blog

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.... .. a must-read for everyone this Mother's Day....
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Wed, 07 May 2008 06:03:00 PST

The Nederland, TX Office of the United States Postal Service..

.. can suck my big fat fucking cock!
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Fri, 11 Apr 2008 02:47:00 PST

Star Wars Figures Needed

If you have access to any of these & live close to the shop, bring them in & I'll give you $10 in store credit for them. That's about a $3 profit depending on where you get them. For the conce...
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Fri, 11 Apr 2008 05:50:00 PST

.. and I was doing so well.

Why can’t people get it through their skulls that I want nothing to do with my father, period. The fact that we share a name kills me.. if my name were my hand, I would simply amputate. If he we...
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:35:00 PST

Patricide..

"Gods and mortal men share one quality. To be who we are, we must kill our fathers.For the mortals, this is a metaphor, a way of saying you must step out from behind your father’s shadow and dec...
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Wed, 02 Apr 2008 04:40:00 PST

All right, then..

I weighed myself both before & after taking a crap.. I am such a boy.
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Fri, 21 Mar 2008 11:30:00 PST

Assholes, every single one..

"My vest and pants are Monarchy -- their stuff is innovative, sexy and flattering. The glasses and hat are Hurley -- their stuff is fun, easy to wear and youthful. The shoes are Christian Louboutin a...
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Thu, 20 Mar 2008 08:31:00 PST

What the fuck, people?!

Why does something like this even exist?...
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Tue, 18 Mar 2008 10:25:00 PST

Hmm..

Is it wrong for me to refer to my semen as Vitamin K?
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Sat, 15 Mar 2008 08:06:00 PST

I clicked my heels but I’m still here..

Everytime I go out of town, I always dread returning home.  Let's face it, folks.. this is southeast Texas, what exactly is there to look forward to? This weekend was spent between Austin & H...
Posted by K. Korry Smith, Esq. on Tue, 04 Mar 2008 08:26:00 PST