JESSEVITAL.COM - ProfilesArchive

About Me

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Eat Pussy Not Cows

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Vital at the Alley Kat

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When I was born, my parents named me Jesse David Vital. Really, that's my real fucking name. I know it sounds like a phony name but it's not. Several generations ago, the "E" on the end of Vitale was dropped. Google me, fucksucker. I live to make and do stuff. maybe you'll like what I make, maybe not. I can't force you. It is my opinion that creativity is the only reason for life to exist. I'd like to see a spirit try to paint a picture or sing a song. good luck holding that guitar, floating poltergeist. It is my opinion that humans are dumber than animals. I don't eat animals, although, on occasion, I do eat out humans. I hate drugs, although most people who see what I create assume I'm on them. I love bright colors, makeup, costumes, and Halloween. If I ever get married, it will be on Halloween. In my spare time, I'm working up a plan to take over the world. Seriously.

My Interests

Fuck it, I aint gonna lie... I'm the most interesting person I know. I'm totally serious. I'm super modest and down to earth as well. Really. This is not a fucking joke people. I can't help that I'm fucking awesome, it's just the truth. Ask anyone.

I'd like to meet:

People who break rules.
People who have vision.
People who are fearless.
People who never give up.
People who strive for perfection.
People who are uncompromising.
People who want to be challenged.
People who want to see modern society be disassembled.
People who realize only they are are responsible for their lives.
People who care more about their friends and family then their car.
People who don't let their intellect get in the way of accomplishing goals.
People who bring atention to themselves through creativity, rather than drama.
Girls with long legs.

If you like what you see or hear, you probably have bad taste. So, please take a moment to check out my official web site-
jessevital.com

The Jesse Vital Print Store At Pequea Creek Fine Art

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Music:

I've been playing guitar since I was 12, I should be better by now.

Movies:

I got a couple over on the right, but they all kinda suck. except the one about eating pussy, that one has a good message for the kids.

Television:

Once, I won a thousand dollars worth of Omaha Steak, but I hadn't eaten meat in over ten years. Thanks a lot Regis and Kelly.

Books:

Only when the words come out of peoples mouths in white bubbles.

Heroes:

Buckaroo Banzai

My Blog

Sign up for my Mailing list

not all fields are required, just fill out what you feel comfortable with. I guess email is the most important. Thanks and I'll be sure to sell all yer info online. not.-JVCFirst Name:Last Name:Compa...
Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Sun, 29 Jul 2007 08:29:00 PST

Green Tea And Safety Glass (a confession)

"Watch out& Motorcycle!"Too late.Tinny pieces of safety glass from a rented Chevy Malibu and tinny drops of Tazo green tea from Starbucks dance above my lap for an eternity.A spray of diamonds from th...
Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Thu, 03 May 2007 03:37:00 PST

(The Island) Original fiction from yer boy, Jesse Vital

Found this in some old files. I think it's from 2003. Based entirely on a dream I had, really. I can't write any other way.THE ISLAND by Jesse VitalThe DJ made his way through the massive bargain stor...
Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Fri, 13 Apr 2007 03:33:00 PST

How I almost died.

so, i guess you can't mention "near death experience" in a bulletin without elaborating. i had miss-diagnosed appendicitis the last week of high school and missed prom and finals and all that stuff. t...
Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Thu, 05 Apr 2007 06:17:00 PST

What makes art interesting?

Homework from my first year at North Carolina School of the ArtsFebruary 1995What makes art interesting?Art is a weird and undefinable thing, but what makes art interesting to me is when something loo...
Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Thu, 05 Apr 2007 01:07:00 PST

Gayest Blog Ever

Yep, it's no secret that I'm pretty much half gay. I mean, what other straight dude do you know that actually truly understands color. In addition to having the emotional response of a teenage girl, I...
Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Tue, 09 Jan 2007 02:49:00 PST

12 days of ROCKmas from JESSEVITAL.COM (RECAP all 21 videos)

12 days of ROCKmas from JESSEVITAL.COM1.So, i was thinking about a cool myspace gift to give my legions of devout fans, and I thought Rock N Roll would be nice.I'll be sending out awesome rock videos ...
Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Wed, 27 Dec 2006 08:37:00 PST

I'm in Juxtapoz Magazine

Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Sat, 23 Dec 2006 04:16:00 PST

Argument for Acquiring Vampire Status

To Whom It May Concern:First off, I never age. It's true. I look exactly the same as I did ten years ago. This fact alone should be enough to grant me Special Vampire Status, although, I've added some...
Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Thu, 30 Nov 2006 06:20:00 PST

ROAD RASH

ROAD RASHIf you think I don't let the thought cross my mindYour crazyMaybe, I secretly wish for itWho doesn't want to fly through the air like superman?Ending your glorious trip by having your fragile...
Posted by JESSEVITAL.COM on Tue, 14 Nov 2006 12:59:00 PST