james's story____For seven months Michelle Rokke worked as an undercover investigator inside of Huntingdon Life Sciences - acting as the lone beacon of compassion in an otherwise violent landscape. Michelle witnessed firsthand the frustration, the horror, and the torment that fills the lives of those innocent animals imprisoned and poisoned daily in this "research" laboratory.Most days after work Michelle would do what most of us would think emotionally impossible - she would relive that day's suffering by recording in her private journal the atrocities she had seen and the anguish she had felt.Her journal entries document a clear and detailed pattern of horrific animal cruelty and illegal fraudulent science. These journal entries, couple with the photographs and undercover video evidence, damned HLS and almost closed its doors permanently.Her journal is over a hundred pages long of heartbreaking stories and is impossible to read in one sitting. The story of James is one of the most sensitive and the saddest contained within this journal. We have gone through Michelle's diary and have taken all excerpts pertaining to James and have laid them out chronologically.The story of James is both deeply touching and profoundly disturbing. It is about the amazing bond formed between a curious little "lab" monkey and his only hope for safety - Michelle. The tender moments they shared are offset by James' psychological decline as a victim of vicious abuse. Michelle was able to provide the only form of comfort and love this little primate would know in his short life.Although James may be dead, his death need not be in vain. There are several hundred other monkeys just like James inside of HLS right now - with NO ONE providing those sparse few moments of kindness that James had. It is up to each and every one of us to take action today and everyday until the doors of Huntingdon Life Sciences slam shut forever.
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11/21/96 Thursday HLSI went into room 957. There is a male, 6988, who clings to the front of his cage staring at the door. He’s very curious and was the only monkey who didn’t leap to the back of the cage when I walked in.11/28/96 Thursday HLSI went into room 957, the P & G study, to take some photos. The primates are all very afraid of people and jump to the back of the cages when the door opens. The first monkeys who notice the door open send a warning cry to the others, and the room echoes with excited shrieking. The monkey cages are all supposed to have ‘enrichment’ mirrors attached and those primates lucky enough to get a mirror use them to their advantage. They’re so clever, they don’t use their mirrors to look at their own reflection, they use them as reflectors and subtly check out what’s going on in different parts of the room. They surreptitiously watch whoever’s in the room, pretending they’re not interested but not missing a thing. 6988 is different from the rest. He stays bravely at the front of his cage, his feet propped on the bars as he rests on the lone perch. His hands are always clenched around the bars, near his chin. I handed him a peanut that was out of his reach and he took it gently from my fingers
CHAPTER 2 - DECEMBER12/7/96 Saturday HLSI cleaned the P&G study, 3314. I’ve started calling the friendly male in 957, James. He’s always so curious and unafraid. The monkey cages are cleaned with the primates still in them, and most of the primates cling to the back of the cage, as high up, away from the water as they can get. If the water gets too close to them they make scared faces and try to get away, screaming in panic. When I cleaned James’ cage, he stays on his perch in his usual position, watching as the debris is rinsed out of the cage pan. He likes to watch the water and today he licked drops of water from the cage when I was through cleaning. I held the hose at the top of the cage and he caught the droplets in his tongue. I feel bad for the monkeys -- they’re so afraid of people, almost all of them act very defensively when people pause near their cages. I’m not sure why this little guy is so different, but he sure doesn’t belong here. None of them do.12/8/96 Sunday HLSI cleaned study 3314. Several of the primates are missing the ‘enrichment’ mirrors that are supposed to be on each cage.In room 957, James was curious and friendly as always. A couple of the other monkeys will take a treat from my hand but most of them won’t come near the front of the cage when I’m near them.All of the monkeys are so sad. They live isolated in tiny cages without any companionship or mental stimulation. I think the reason James hangs on the front of his cage is because he’s so lonely and afraid. He doesn’t belong in this cage in this laboratory and he knows it.12/15/96 Sunday HLSIn 3314, I took photos of James. It’s hard to photograph the other monkeys because they’re so afraid they jump to the back of the cage and turn toward the cage wall. James is always at the front of his cage staring longingly at the door. He looks so sad. He’s interested in things I show him, like the hose and my ID badge, but it seems he only looks at them because there’s nothing better to do.12/21/96 Saturday HLSIn room 957, my friendly little monkey who hangs on the cage door, lets me stroke his hand and drinks water droplets gently from the hose now paces nervously in his cage. I wasn’t able to snap a picture of him because he was pacing so much. I couldn’t figure out what would change his personality so much in just a few days. Later, I saw on the behavior chart he had been acclimated to nasal-gastric tube the day before.Where before I saw sad loneliness, now I see fear bordering on hysteria. A realization that what was a bad situation for this gentle little monkey has now become his worst nightmare.12/28/96 Saturday HLSJames was hanging on his cage door as usual this morning, staring longingly at the door. When I stopped in front of his cage he turned and stared into my eyes. The expression on his face was one of thoughtful contemplation. He studied each part of my face, cocking his head to the side and cooing softly. We shared another long gaze into each other’s eyes and to my surprise this tiny little monkey reached his hand out and touch my forehead. He stroked it gently, once and looked at the hair hanging out of my protective bonnet. To my surprise, he started gently grooming me, moving his fingers carefully through my hair, stopping only to move closer to the bars of the cage separating us.After several minutes, I told him it was his turn and he stopped what he was doing and offered me the top of his head. As I stroked my fingers through his baby-fine hair, trying to imitate his movements, I felt like I’d known him forever.12/29/96 Sunday HLSFor the first time in months I was excited to go into work. After yesterday, I feel like I finally have a friend at the laboratory. When I entered the room James was, as usual, hanging on the front of his cage, staring hard at the door to the hallway. When I knelt in front of him, he reached for me right away, tugging impatiently at the elastic of my protective bonnet, trying to expose more of my hair. He moved his fingers across my head and I can’t begin to describe what a wonderful sensation it was. The bond between this monkey and I is like nothing I’ve ever felt before. That he trusts me, in my white lab suit and protective gear - looking so much like the other technicians he sees, is beyond belief. It might stem from the fact my behavior is different then the other techs, I’ve always taken the time to say “Helloâ€, each time I’m in the room alone with him and I’m careful not to spray him with water when I clean his cage. I think he knows I am different from the other employees, I’m there to help him - not hurt him.
3/22/97 Saturday HLSJames was all hunched over near the feeder hole when I went in to see him. He reached out for me right away when I knelt in front of him, then he quickly hunched over again. I don’t know if he’s sick and uncomfortable in any other position or if he’s just miserable. He let me rub his back and stroke his head for a while but he wouldn’t take the treat I offered him.I can’t wait for the Procter and Gamble study to be over. As much as I love James, I can’t wait until the misery of these tests are over for him. I know I can’t do anything to help him and now, everyday, I hope the test substance will kill him so his suffering will be over. The only thing keeping me going at this point is the hope that once the public learns how fraudulent animal research is maybe no more animals will have to suffer and die. Companies like Procter and Gamble, who bought James and enslaved him in their torture chamber, will have to acknowledge how useless animal research is. Outdated regulations will have to be changed to protect humans as well as animals.3/23/97 Sunday HLSJames was all curled up in a fetal position as usual and he flashed me his submissive grin when I first went in - then he looked thoughtfully at me. He let me stroke his head and he stretched his shoulders back so I could rub his tummy and chest. I stroked his cheek and he tipped his head back and smiled just a little. When I got up to leave he resumed his fetal position and tucked his head down low.3/29/97 Saturday HLSI went in to see James about 2:30. It was less than an hour since dosing and he was still all freaked out. He was sitting tensely on the perch of his cage when I went in and he grinned submissively and scampered back when I approached. He came to the front of his cage when I knelt in front of it and stared out into the room. He let me stroke his leg for a while but while I was petting his tummy one of the neighboring monkeys started shaking his cage violently, screaming and banging at the bars. All the noise startled James and tucked down into his fetal position. He didn’t look at me at all today the few minutes I was with him.3/30/97 Sunday HLSI went to see James today. He was clinging to the front of his cage and flashed me his submissive grin before focusing in on me. He tucked his head down and let me rub his back. He stretched his head back so I could rub his chest. I told him he was too far away from me and I couldn’t reach him. He got up and walked to the back of the cage. When he came back he settled in as close to the cage door as he could get. I rubbed his arms, legs, and chest for a few more minutes. James tipped he head back with his mouth open slightly as he stared vacantly at the top of the cage. The distant expression on his face makes me think it’s becoming harder for him to know kindness for a few brief minutes than to ever know it at all. I think a lot of us are familiar with that little trick - acting distant and nonchalant because maybe it just might hurt less when someone we love has to leave.
4/13/97 Sunday HLSWhen I went in to see James today he stared into my eyes and then down at his feet as I told him goodbye. Most of the monkeys in 3314, including James, will be killed on Thursday and Friday this week. They’re scheduled for all kinds of blood work and ECGs as the study winds up and I told him I may not be able to see him again. When I told him this he came to the center of the door and pressed his whole face against the cage staring at me. I stroked his cheek and whispered goodbye and I as I stood up and he moved back to his fetal position, it occurred to me, too late, that he was pressing his face forward for a kiss.4/17/97 Thursday HLSI saw the sacrifice order on the door of the Procter and Gamble study. There are eight monkeys that will be kept alive for a recovery period. Four of the control animals and four of the group five animals - two of each group from each room. James is scheduled to die on Friday. Stephanie was bringing the monkeys to the necropsy room and checking their numbers off the sacrifice order as they died. Throughout the day I saw her carrying sedated primates wrapped like sleeping babies in garbage bags down the hall to the necropsy room.Stephanie and one of the necropsy guys were trying to find a vein to euthanize a group one primate. I could see the primate’s hand clenching and unclenching as they searched. Stephanie was holding off and the necropser was injecting. In the past, I’ve seen the necropsers hack a big chunk of skin off a monkey’s arm to expose the vein. The necropser injected part of some solution into the monkey before he realized it wasn’t going in, it was just blowing up under the skin. They switched arms and tried again, finally getting the euthanasia solution administered. Just a few seconds after that the necropser tapped on the primate’s eye and asked if he was dead before walking away. He left the room and Rich came in to do the necropsy complaining that Henning was supposed to be in there doing it and he didn’t know he had to come down to do this until a few minutes ago. He tapped on the primate’s half-closed eyes with the end of the scalpel saying “You dead?†and then sliced into him. He completely opened the thoracic cavity and severed an artery (vein??), saw the blood being pumped out by the heart said, “this guy could be out more†(indicating the monkey was able to feel the pain of the necropsy) as he continued to slice and hack.Before long the primate was nothing more than a bloody flat mass, quickly scooped up and tossed into the garbage can at the end of the table as Stephanie poked her head in asking if they were ready for another one. I made myself go in and talk to James one last time. I didn’t want to - I walked by all the empty cages with their doors hanging open in the next room, the former occupants now in bloody bags in the freezer down the hall. My little friend looked at me and stretched out so I could rub his stomach one last time and quickly slouched over into his fetal position when I said goodbye.