PAOLO profile picture

PAOLO

ghost riding unicorns is my biz

About Me

gentle-perv/aspiring/perspiring narceologist DFM seeks sleazy weezy. enjoys long walks to fancy neighborhoods and hiding in bushes and shrubbery (sometimes in a glass menagerie). love to shave womens legs and topi-areas if allowed. graduate student working towards a PhD in demonology in hopes to one day have my own ghost hunting show on the discovery channel. i'd love to show the world something they haven't yet seen... not excluding my genitalia or my gentle area. i have a curfew in effect after 10pm due to the fact that mama don't like me staying out too late with hooligans. i have a pimple on my armpit named tiffany that enjoys being caressed by supple fingertips. tiffany gets jealous, ladies, beware. my spare time is spent learning tunisian macrame and lebonese landscaping techniquues. i'd like to retire as vigilante. ANGAUWA!

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My Interests

HANDBALL, BULL RIDING, SPOONING, ESKIMO KISSES & PIES, the word RAD, rod stewart, sexiness, sloths, koalas, illegal sloth and koala deathmatches, playing with my japanese import transformers (optimus stays in the box awaiting its optimal prime) folk medicine, hurdygurdies, follicle mites, african beeswax, searching for truth, justice and the armenian way, 45 min slumber parties, pokemon, gem & the holo grams of cocaine, the kingdom of camelot, alpacas , thine reading rainbow, the chronicles of pornia, milkfish & my fellowship of thine ringtone. word combos i.e. meat + curtains = murtains. and bed bath and beyond thunderdome.

I'd like to meet:

treasures, my next victim, drunken college girls gone wild under the influence of life and rohipnol, sailors, magicians, impersonators, imposters, posers, brit spears' baby, all sseven jackson 5 members, ike turner, esteban, bill nye, stephen hawkins, ben & jerry, moose knuckles, fellow mind freakers that like to get freaky via mind, iceman aka val, and a huckstable but i'll settle for bud.

Music:

popular hurdygurdy folk ballads. lute jams. afternoon delight. turkish gypsy hymns. color me badd. shave me baldd. weird al. crazy ed. country christmas classics. russ meyers soundtrax. hasselhoff. e. murphy... yeah, that's eddie murphy. axl f. hillary duff. willy wonka soundtrack. tuvan throat arrangements accompanied by esteban (croatian import tracks). agnostic rock. fraggle rock. crack rock. chris rock. the rock. chumba wumba. mark walhberg. detroit. let's go band. the immaculate collection. rodley 'the rod' haynesfield. rod stewart. anything played on kazoo. theme park music from boulder-shaped speakers. gregorian chant. enya. heavy d. avril levine and evan'essence of diahrrea.

Movies:

carnesaurs, scratchface, pornmalia, clownporn... the creepier the better, abs of steel.... anything basedow. the crush... anything silverstone. three men and a baby... anything guttenberg, danson or selleck...beethoven. crossroads... anything spears, duff or lohan. faces of death. beauty and the beast. peter pain. anything depp. snuff flicks feat. snuffy and big bird. get rich or die trying. anything cheap. i.e. 50cent. anything with NAS and DMX. soulplane. the barbershop chronology. gone with the wind. whitehouse aka casa blanca. house party 1&3. jurrasic pork. porkies. jumanji & zathura. killer bikini beach planet. lord of thine rings (extended remix) anything frotto. carrie 2. dracula 2000. bum fights. gigli. jersey girl. anything j-lo especially the wedding planner. ghostbusters 2. karate kid 3. walker texas ranger box set qualifies as a movie. sidekicks. anything brandis or norris. 8 mile. anything mathers. carebears: the curse of the clap happy jezebel. smurfs reunion the movie. a very brady christmas. anything latifah. AVP. the notebook.

Television:

i like to watch alot of surveilance footage from cameras i've installed in various bathrooms... if that's what this section is for... but basslickly, i just like to watch.

Books:

the babysitters club. nancy drew. nora roberts. bunnicula. pamphlets you get at the clinic when you get tested for burning pee. clifford. yearbooks... all 4. my sisters diary. my brother's diary. hungryman frozen dinner instructions. anything audio. the bible.... ptolemaic edition.

Heroes:

BASEDOW. THE HULKSTER. anyone named ROD. YAO-MING. GODZILLA. ROCK LOBSTERS. thine DIDDY. LL BEAN & COOL J. Obese Joseph aka fat joe. the living members the fat boys. JULIUS. your mama. anyone who can pull off wearing jean shorts with a cardigan... so that would include... boys2men. splinter for showing such patience with those rowdy amphibs. he-man. meg white... bitch can bang... a drum. just one. william hung. coz he bangs too. clay aching. yanni. tesh. bony james. kenny g. sanborn. did i mention BASEDOW?

My Blog

tommy's proposed schedule for me.

Hello Mr. Gomez, Just a reminder that were going into the studio this week and you must follow you diet and exercise regiment very strictly.5:30am-wake up5:32am-shower5:36am-brush teeth5:37am-hair exe...
Posted by PAOLO on Sat, 18 Feb 2006 05:15:00 PST

my friend pinki

me: nick we need to focus, get financially comfy so that we can put our efforts into becoming philantropists. pinki(aka nick): i don't know man, the french are assholes.
Posted by PAOLO on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

people have such high expectations

looking to start a bobby mcferrin tribute band. i need a guitarist that exudes that inconspicuous closet homosexual vibe; so as to intoxicate our audience with a mystical allure, similar to that of si...
Posted by PAOLO on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

how you talk

this is for you, linda.... Your Linguistic Profile: 65% General American English 20% Yankee 10% Dixie 5% Upper Midwestern 0% Midwestern What Kind of American English Do You Speak? ...
Posted by PAOLO on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST