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Help_the_hurting

help_the_hurting

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Every life touches someone & no life should ever be forgotten especially the life of a child~
You Are Loved & Missed Immensely!!Andrew Neely 4-5-07
Anthony age 16
Julia Curran 4-9-07Jonathan age 15
Uli Valdez 10-07-07
Hoey 16 y.o.
Hilary Waltmire 10-23-07
David age 18
Blaine White 10-29-07
3 teens lost TABB H.S., VA '07-'08
Andrew Lopez Age 17
Jeffery age 15
In Memory of Kirsten's seven friends she has lost, in her short life time, to suicide: Luk-15, Andrew-17, Neely-15,
Tyler-14, Kyle-15, Sarah-13, Nick-14

You are not forgotten.
In Memory of the 5000 lose this year. teens we will
_________________________________
Go ahead- Click on it- I dare you....
____________________________________________________________ ________

You can find a handbook written for those dealing with loss by suicide at Suicidology.org called "S.O.S." It's free to read online, or to download & print. We found this booklet to be very helpful!
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Suicide Hotlines in your stateSuicidal Thoughts: What to do
~Support someone with depression~
Is your teen on the wrong path?
~types of depression~
~for more information~What to tell children after losing someone they love to suicideWhen the worst has happenedTWLOHA gives 25% of all proceeds to treatment and recovery through the following organizations:NATIONAL HOPELINE NETWORK (1-800-SUICIDE) - WWW.HOPELINE.COMThe National Hopeline is a non-profit organization that fights suicide at the front lines. Their toll-free call line is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and links the caller to the nearest crisis hotline in their area. To date, they have received over 2 million calls from individuals struggling with thoughts of suicide.TEEN CHALLENGE - WWW.TEENCHALLENGEUSA.COMTeen Challenge is a rehab program with locations in 70 different countries. "Teen Challenge endeavors to help people become mentally sound, emotionally balanced, socially adjusted, physically well, and spiritually alive." Many Teen Challenge centers offer treatment for free, and that is made possible through donations.MERCY MINISTRIES - WWW.MERCYMINISTRIES.ORGMercy is a non-profit organization for young women who face life-controlling issues. They provide residential programs free of charge designed to address the whole person: spiritual, physical and emotional. Mercy homes are located in the USA, Australia, and the UK. Construction is underway for Mercy's first home in Canada.S.A.F.E.(Self-Abuse Finally Ends) - WWW.SELFINJURY.COM 1-800-DONT-CUT"S.A.F.E. Alternatives is a nationally recognized treatment approach, professional network and educational resource base, which is committed to helping you and others achieve an end to self-injurious behavior."KIDS HELP LINE (Australia) - WWW.KIDSHELP.COM.AU / 1-800-55-1800Offers free, confidential, anonymous 24-hour phone and online counseling for young people (5-25) in Australia.

Music:

"Suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain." That's all it's about. You are not a bad person, or crazy, or weak, or flawed, because you feel suicidal. It doesn't even mean that you really want to die - it only means that you have more pain than you can cope with right now. If I start piling weights on your shoulders, you will eventually collapse if I add enough weights... no matter how much you want to remain standing. Willpower has nothing to do with it. Of course you would cheer yourself up, if you could.

(1-800-999-9999 Teen line- Someone is available 24 hrs a day)When pain exceeds pain-coping resources, suicidal feelings are the result. Suicide is neither wrong nor right; it is not a defect of character; it is morally neutral. It is simply an imbalance of pain versus coping resources.You can survive suicidal feelings if you do either of two things: (1) find a way to reduce your pain, or (2) find a way to increase your coping resources. Both are possible.
Now I want to tell you five things to think about.
1 You need to hear that people do get through this -- even people who feel as badly as you are feeling now. Statistically, there is a very good chance that you are going to live. I hope that this information gives you some sense of hope.
2 Give yourself some distance. Say to yourself, "I will wait 24 hours before I do anything." Or a week. Remember that feelings and actions are two different things - just because you feel like killing yourself, doesn't mean that you have to actually do it right this minute. Put some distance between your suicidal feelings and suicidal action. Even if it's just 24 hours. You have already done it for 5 minutes, just by reading this page. You can do it for another 5 minutes by continuing to read this page. Keep going, and realize that while you still feel suicidal, you are not, at this moment, acting on it. That is very encouraging to me, and I hope it is to you.
3 People often turn to suicide because they are seeking relief from pain. Remember that relief is a feeling. And you have to be alive to feel it. You will not feel the relief you so desperately seek, if you are dead.
4 Some people will react badly to your suicidal feelings, either because they are frightened, or angry; they may actually increase your pain instead of helping you, despite their intentions, by saying or doing thoughtless things. You have to understand that their bad reactions are about their fears, not about you.
But there are people out there who can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel. They will simply care for you. Find one of them. Now. Use your 24 hours, or your week, and tell someone what's going on with you. It is okay to ask for help. Try:
Send an anonymous e-mail to The Samaritans
Call 1-800-SUICIDE in the U.S.
Teenagers, call Covenant House NineLine, 1-800-999-9999
Look in the front of your phone book for a crisis line
Call a psychotherapist
Carefully choose a friend or a minister or rabbi, someone who is likely to listen
But don't give yourself the additional burden of trying to deal with this alone. Just talking about how you got to where you are, releases an awful lot of the pressure, and it might be just the additional coping resource you need to regain your balance.
5 Suicidal feelings are, in and of themselves, traumatic. After they subside, you need to continue caring for yourself. Therapy is a really good idea. So are the various self-help groups available both in your community and on the Internet.
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Reports in Sept. 2007 said Suicide was the 3rd leading cause of teen death, in April 2008 reports show the suicide rate for teens had increased to the 2nd leading cause of death. Protect your children, talk with them, listen to them, take them seriously.


If you have thoughts of suicide Let Someone Know Your Pain!
1.800.SUICIDE (784-2433)
OkCity (405) 848-CARE (2273)
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Movies:

The Truth!!
1.Take it seriously. Myth: "The people who talk about it don't do it." Studies have found that more than 75% of all completed suicides did things in the few weeks or months prior to their deaths to indicate to others that they were in deep despair. Anyone expressing suicidal feelings needs immediate attention.
Myth: "Anyone who tries to kill himself has got to be crazy." Perhaps 10% of all suicidal people are psychotic or have delusional beliefs about reality. Most suicidal people suffer from the recognized mental illness of depression; but many depressed people adequately manage their daily affairs. The absence of "craziness" does not mean the absence of suicide risk."Those problems weren't enough to commit suicide over," is often said by people who knew a completed suicide. You cannot assume that because you feel something is not worth being suicidal about, that the person you are with feels the same way. It is not how bad the problem is, but how badly it's hurting the person who has it.
2.Remember: suicidal behavior is a cry for help. Myth: "If a someone is going to kill himself, nothing can stop him." The fact that a person is still alive is sufficient proof that part of him wants to remain alive. The suicidal person is ambivalent - part of him wants to live and part of him wants not so much death as he wants the pain to end. It is the part that wants to live that tells another "I feel suicidal." If a suicidal person turns to you it is likely that he believes that you are more caring, more informed about coping with misfortune, and more willing to protect his confidentiality. No matter how negative the manner and content of his talk, he is doing a positive thing and has a positive view of you.
3.Be willing to give and get help sooner rather than later. Suicide prevention is not a last minute activity. All textbooks on depression say it should be reached as soon as possible. Unfortunately, suicidal people are afraid that trying to get help may bring them more pain: being told they are stupid, foolish, sinful, or manipulative; rejection; punishment; suspension from school or job; written records of their condition; or involuntary commitment. You need to do everything you can to reduce pain, rather than increase or prolong it. Constructively involving yourself on the side of life as early as possible will reduce the risk of suicide.
4.Listen. Give the person every opportunity to unburden his troubles and ventilate his feelings. You don't need to say much and there are no magic words. If you are concerned, your voice and manner will show it. Give him relief from being alone with his pain; let him know you are glad he turned to you. Patience, sympathy, acceptance. Avoid arguments and advice giving.
5.ASK: "Are you having thoughts of suicide?" (or "Do you ever want to just end it all?") Myth: "Talking about it may give someone the idea." People already have the idea; suicide is constantly in the news media. If you ask a despairing person this question you are doing a good thing for them: you are showing him that you care about him, that you take him seriously, and that you are willing to let him share his pain with you. You are giving him further opportunity to discharge pent up and painful feelings. If the person is having thoughts of suicide, find out how far along his ideation has progressed.
6.If the person is acutely suicidal, do not leave him/her alone, not even for a couple of minutes. If the means are present, try to get rid of them. Detoxify the home. (This includes all weapons, knives, razors, medications, ropes, leather belts, etc.)
7.No secrets. It is the part of the person that is afraid of more pain that says "Don't tell anyone." It is the part that wants to stay alive that tells you about it. Respond to that part of the person and persistently seek out a mature and compassionate person with whom you can review the situation. (You can get outside help and still protect the person from pain causing breaches of privacy.) Do not try to go it alone. Get help for the person and for yourself. Distributing the anxieties and responsibilities of suicide prevention makes it easier and much more effective.
8.From crisis to recovery. Most people have suicidal thoughts or feelings at some point in their lives; yet less than 2% of all deaths are suicides. Nearly all suicidal people suffer from conditions that will pass with time or with the assistance of a recovery program. There are hundreds of modest steps we can take to improve our response to the suicidal and to make it easier for them to seek help. Taking these modest steps can save many lives and reduce a great deal of human suffering.
Found at: http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

My Blog

To Surviving Parents

If You've Lost a Child to SuicideFor parents, the death of a child is probably the most painful loss imaginable. For parents who've lost a child to suicide, the pain and grief may be intensified. Alth...
Posted by Help_the_hurting on Thu, 10 Apr 2008 11:18:00 PST

Everyone read this plz!

Read it, memorize it, print it, give it to your parents, your friends, your co-workers. Leave it at the doctor's office, give it to your school counselor. Plz get the word out! This is important ...
Posted by Help_the_hurting on Thu, 08 May 2008 08:39:00 PST

Warning Signs

Warning SignsThere are often signs that someone may be thinking about or planning a suicide attempt. Here are some of them: talking about suicide or death in general talking about "going away" referr...
Posted by Help_the_hurting on Thu, 10 Apr 2008 12:49:00 PST

Why do teens try to kill themselves?

Ethan felt like there was no point going on with life. Things had been tough since his mom died. His dad was working two jobs and seemed frazzled and angry most of the time. Whenever he and Ethan talk...
Posted by Help_the_hurting on Thu, 10 Apr 2008 12:50:00 PST

Left Behind

Jan. 1, 1999 TO: Any Suicidal Young Person FROM: Tony Salvatore RE: Being a Parent Left Behind Just over two years ago, in 1996, my oldest son, Paul, completed suicide. I do some pages on suicide in h...
Posted by Help_the_hurting on Thu, 10 Apr 2008 10:28:00 PST