Hayley // Impayley profile picture

Hayley // Impayley

perth is a culture shock

About Me



Check out my Flickr Photos at WWW.FLICKR.COM/PHOTOS/IMPAYLEY


My Interests

Some of my interests include... humiliating myself in public and private, pretending I am still five years old, daytime television, trying to play guitar, failing, Failing at life in general, Long distance relationships, Chicken and music or preferably both, Singing. Heaps. Aretha. Weeweehumour. I'm not afraid of being old/fat.

I'd like to meet:

People that will buy me drinks without expecting anything in return. That'd be nice.. Maybe some cooks. I'm trying to learn. Dinosaurs. Origami master. Harry Bish enthusiasts. Puppies of all kinds. Ancestorz. Foetal alcohol syndrome prevention. Myspace is silly.Also:

Music:

-Pat Benatar is the coolest person EVER -rock n' rollll and most things related -jazz, blues, soul, swing, garage, rockabilly, punnk -generally stuff that's good/talented/has a message/isn't a pile of wank

Movies:

THE COMMITMENTS

Wanna be like these ladies...

Television:

Prisoner, Buffy/Angel, Boston Legal,Absolutely Fabulous, Black Books, The IT Crowd, Mighty Boosh, Family Guy...and most crime shows heh (nerrd!)
Bob Dylan.... You speak about social issues, but it's somewhat
hard to understand you.

Which rockstar are you like?
brought to you by Quizilla

Books:

I have so many books on the shelf i haven't read yet, but so far, Bukowski, H.S.Thompson, Pelahniuk, Orwell, some other shit worth mentioning.

Heroes:

Bradley Nowell, Poly Styrene, Eve Libertine, Billie Holiday, Etta James, Aretha F, Brigitte Bardot, Nina Simone, Pat Benatar. That guy that always washes my windscreen outside Planet Video - he said I would make a boy very happy one day...? Harry BishHayley & Gene Unplugged at the Oak & Ivy...

My Blog

Too many adverbs.

My little legs are getting awfully restless. I've been writing all day and don't seem to be going anywhere. Why is everyone busy tonight? To write myself off would be a much easier way out than actual...
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Fri, 15 Jun 2007 02:15:00 PST

Txt, Drugs + Rock 'n Roll.

The fair is a veritable smorgasboard my friends, but if you look closely, you're bound to observe the seedy underbelly of carnies and carnal depravity that shapes us all. Sex is supposedly a surv...
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Wed, 14 Mar 2007 08:28:00 PST

"Shut Up Baby"

fes·tive  [fes-tiv] adjective 1. pertaining to or suitable for a feast or festival: festive decorations; a festive meal. 2. joyous; merry: a festive mood.   --------------...
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Mon, 01 Jan 2007 07:35:00 PST

Red or White

So I'm at my mum's, and my sister is crying because Mother is eating her self-esteem for dessert tonight. Pasta was the main course, it was average. But I'm not here to construct a food critique....
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Mon, 16 Oct 2006 07:05:00 PST

Good Cop, Bad Cop

Hello glorious interweb, it's been a while hey? I guess we can do some catching up, as long as you promise not to keep humping my leg in your whorish ways. Fucking myspace ay? Can't live with the bitc...
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Tue, 12 Sep 2006 05:17:00 PST

RSVP

I'm moving away and I'm never coming back.   I hope you all get crabs. The end.  ...
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Fri, 05 May 2006 11:40:00 PST

Sex Cyst

Greetings fellow techno-scum of the interworld. Recent international surveys have revealed shocking statistics that confirm that you all have a lower-than-average sperm count and are going to die...
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Wed, 05 Apr 2006 12:26:00 PST

"Miss, Mrs or Ms?" -----> "Umm, nah man."

A lady does not disgorge gas or bile. She does not discuss the concept of corn embedded in faecal matter, especially whilst dining. A lady does not even barely notice the difference between a cir...
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Mon, 30 Jan 2006 11:32:00 PST

Fuck you. Dick me. Kill the kids.

Oh mannnnnnnnnnnnnn I going freakin bezerkeded. ed.    KILL THE CORPORATE WHORES AND THEIR SKINNY-ARSED FUCKING HALF-DEAD PARKINSONS DISEASE-RIDDEN PERSONAL ASSISTANTS! AND THEIR POMPOUS OVE...
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Tue, 10 Jan 2006 09:29:00 PST

we have no fucking bananas

Oh man, what a smeg of a week. ("smeg" - as in smegma, as in smeggy testicle shite) Impayley: "What do you fucking mean there's no fucking WINE left!?!??!" Impayley's sister: "Shut up you emo bitch" I...
Posted by Hayley // Impayley on Sat, 24 Dec 2005 12:14:00 PST