John " Champale of Awesome" Kennedy

About Me

I like to make out. Im pretty good at it. Sorry, but no dudes may apply.Too bad you can't buy a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin real fast and freak everybody out. I wish I was a traveling willbury, but im not. I used to be a professional ass model but now I do it for the fun of it. I also like the cars that go boom. Id like to have children but I dont have a cooter.I prefer the word "twat" to bush (IE - George Dubya Twat!) and have been know to be "Extra Fancy" on ocassion. I like to sing aloud on the bus and play a banjo at drum circles.There is not one way that gay people getting married would affect anyone. Maybe I'd feel differently if I was a seamstress and didn't didn't have a man-sized wedding dress pattern, but honestly gay people would have to marry gorillas with chainsaws in my backyard before any one thing in my life changed. And if I go to Denny's, I don't care if a lesbian cooked my omelette. The only thing I care about is that she's washed her hand between the time she made my food and the time she had it elbow-deep in vagina. And now that I think about it more, no I don't.

My Interests

Interesting stuff of interest. If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.

I'd like to meet:

you. or a solid gold clown. or maybe just the lady from the 1-800 ask gary commercials that pronounces ask "axe" and I would teach her how to enunciate "ask". or a dog wearing a hat, that would be pretty sweet....

Music:

punk, hardcore, surf, ska, reagge, blues, humor, diy, yallternitave, rural contemporary,false metal.Yacht Rock and general humming.

Movies:

Corporate training films and old JC Pennys security video tapes. I like to go to circut city and put on my own show in the camcorder dept. They currently have a restraining order.

Television:

Blank Generation was an awesome song!

Books:

tim dorsey, carl hiasen, e. hemmingway, se hinton, hunter thompson, Highlights magazine, Swank issue 9 volume 3, Modern drunkard magazine, taco shell boxes,tv guide, NOT JACK KERROWACK! HES A PUNK ASS WACKADACKA BITCH! Thats right I said it...Im not playin.

My Blog

My whore-a-scope..... really?

well, I dont know what to say. Sagittarius (Nov. 22 - Dec. 21)> Right out the chute I am going to tell you...THEY LOVE TO BE SHAVED.> True love is being shaved.> Sagittarius love is being shaved by so...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Fri, 12 Jan 2007 08:11:00 PST

Florida street gangs need to think of better names. Im embarased!

I stumbled on this list of street gangs in florida on the net today. I was suprised at some of the stupid names these gangs chose. They were quite rediculous! I think Im gonna open an office to be a p...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Fri, 05 Jan 2007 10:46:00 PST

What i want for X-Mas!

What I want for x-mas! Add your own list and Il get it to the big guy! Mr. Pot Head Where in the World Are Carmen San Diego and Matt Lauer Shacking Up? board game HungBob NoPants: A Girl's First Sex...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Mon, 18 Dec 2006 01:52:00 PST

My top 10 of Aught Six!!!

Please add your own top 10 to this blog. My Top 10 of aught six! 10.the singing mime videod oing "torn" by natalie Imbrugula. This was the funniest most brilliant thing I have ever seen! Do yourself ...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Sun, 17 Dec 2006 09:48:00 PST

Ladies, PLEASE READ THIS! The politics of sex!

I dont know who the woman who wrote this is, But I love you! Gay guys have been tryong to tell you this shit from the git-go! I expecially loves #34. Please read the whole thing. not as a joke, freeal...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Thu, 07 Dec 2006 04:30:00 PST

Danny McGuires Cooter

Last time you cried:Watching gilmore girls. It wouldnt stop ...sucking!Last text message:meanie! (re sushi)Last meal:sushi box (wow, that sounds awesomely dirty and delicious)Last person to hurt your ...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Fri, 01 Dec 2006 02:16:00 PST

Wow, sound familiar? bumpin into Ex's

One of my frends Wrote this and it created such Dejavu it was silly! whats your opinion on this? I drove all the way into Gville just to see the Weary Boys play tonight.Well, my Ex (for 7yrs) made a c...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Wed, 15 Nov 2006 08:41:00 PST

sneezins greetings

thanks susie and crystal for sharing.... things you can only say during the holidays 1. Talk about a huge breast!2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.3. It's Cool Whip time!4. If I don't ...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Wed, 15 Nov 2006 08:00:00 PST

Jello Biafra was pronounced dead .... sad times!

GOT CHA! LOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLLOOOLLOLO!!! 1. What is in your left pocket? Unlimited posibilities.. 02. How much alcohol did you have this weekend? I was sober all week till around 1:00 am Monday. hope you...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Fri, 10 Nov 2006 01:14:00 PST

I saw Frank the Librarian kick a lamb in the face today.

I wish I had a more manageable penis! This harness is brutal 1) ARE YOU JEWISH?No but I am Jewey.2) LAST PERSON YOU SWORE AT:chef boyardee DAMN SKEDDIOSSSSSSS!!!!!3) 3 CELEBRITIES YOU'D SLEEP WITH...
Posted by John "Th' Don of San Juan" Kennedy on Thu, 09 Nov 2006 08:49:00 PST