Coral Rose [ chosen ones ]

I sent in my application to The Real World, so I'm hoping to hear back from that. I'm putting a lot of my eggs into that basket, the MTV basket. I'm also thinking about getting a gun, and dealing crack. Being a crack dealer. Not, like, a mean crack dealer, but like... like a nice one. Kinda friendly, like, "Hey, what's up guys? You want some crack?". I'm just waiting on those two things to just kinda flesh themselves out. my thoughs weigh heavy. i put my self on co-polit. stoping every now and then to let my eyes disfocus. before i know it i have given away control, mildy regreting my loose grip. reality is far away now. when it comes back my thoughs are distant. will i ever come to a conclusion? if only i could feel strong.strong engough to know, no matter what i can stand. i have fallen before, what if this time i dont get up? am i walking away, or steping forward? im finally confortable, but who just wants confort, ive never been one to settle, but im tired of starting over. i let my subconious deabate. for now i rest. i still have time to listen...................................................... ............................................................ ..........ive thought all of the thoughts+ sipped all the sips+ smoked all there was to smoke+ dreamed about all the dreams+ and i tried to love