Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse)

About Me

I'm the guy that guys like me warned you about...
Here's what you animals think about me.
You know what my favorite thing in the world is? I'll tell you...
Each week, millions and millions of upper middle class American citizens put on expensive dress clothes, and load themselves into SUV's and drive past homeless shelters, orphanages, prisons, missions, and halfway houses on their way to a very expensive and nice church, where somebody tells them how to be more like Jesus.
That is fucking awesome, let me tell you.
Things to see:
I was talking to God the other day and I said, "God...You mother fucker. How could you do this to me? What else do I need to do?" And he replied,"You have to go out...and fuck ALL the sexy people." And I did...
Get your sexy shoes on now, kids...It's a-comin'!
Myspace Countdown Clocks at WishAFriend.com
Metal rules! LOL
OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!
Nicodemos Cain --
[noun]:
A dance involving little to no clothing
'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com
What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com
If it makes any difference, I took this test again and scored Einstein...lol
And on that note...
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Eigth Level of Hell - the Malebolge!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers) Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers) Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful) Very High
Level 3 (Gluttonous) Very High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious) Moderate
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy) Very High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics) High
Level 7 (Violent) Extreme
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers) Extreme
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous) Very High
Take the Dante's Inferno Test
I am worth $1,711,590 on HumanForSale.com
Obligatory Lame-Ass Interview thingy:
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Marty, Nico, Papa Bloat, Satan...Take your pick
Birthday: Sometimes in March
Birthplace: Someplace in Indiana
Current Location: That same bullshit someplace in Indiana
Eye Color: Brown
Hair Color: Brown
Height: Brown...oh, wait...
Right Handed or Left Handed: I have both, thank you.
Your Heritage: Um...I'm like part of a family and stuff...
The Shoes You Wore Today: The same ones I wore yesterday
Your Weakness: Twinkies
Your Fears: Twinkies
Your Perfect Pizza: The ones that I get to make with my daughter. She rules.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Soccer sucks.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Welcome to AOL Instant Messenger!
Thoughts First Waking Up: Damn, it's hard again!
Your Best Physical Feature: My left hand thumbnail.
Your Bedtime: Passed it already.
Your Most Missed Memory: That one time in band camp.
Pepsi or Coke: Coca-Cola, man.
MacDonalds or Burger King: It's "McDonald's" you illiterate prick! Besides, I eat Taco Bell.
Single or Group Dates: What is this "date" you speak of?
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: That question is a bit personal, don't ya think?
Chocolate or Vanilla: Mmmm...Orange Sherbert...
Cappuccino or Coffee: Caffeine is for crack heads and little kids.
Do you Smoke: I am an accomplished second-hand smoker.
Do you Swear: Fuck yeah I do.
Do you Sing: Only when she wants me to.
Do you Shower Daily: Only when she tells me to.
Have you Been in Love: Only when she tells me to...lol.
Do you want to go to College: A college other than the college I'm in? Sure, why not. You paying?
Do you want to get Married: Only when she finally MAKES me.
Do you belive in yourself: I think therefore I am. Do you believe in me?
Do you get Motion Sickness: Only when I'm stopped.
Do you think you are Attractive: I'M DEAD SEXY!!
Are you a Health Freak: No, I'm a super-freak.
Do you get along with your Parents: Who does? Really?
Do you like Thunderstorms: Lightning is cool.
Do you play an Instrument: Guitar.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Only when she wants me to.
In the past month have you Smoked: Dude, I said I'm a second-hand smoker! That shit is EVERYWHERE!!!
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Not that I know of. I still get flashbacks of Woodstock every now and then...weird.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: There's that word again.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Malls are for old people and teenagers...Sure.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Mmmm...Oreos. I like the white chocolate dipped ones.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Raw fish sucks.
In the past month have you been on Stage: Actually yes...I have.
In the past month have you been Dumped: (Insert poop joke here.)
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Only in the bathtub.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: I stole her heart. tehe...ugh.
Ever been Drunk: Ever been stoned?
Ever been called a Tease: Ever been called an ass?
Ever been Beaten up: Everyday.
Ever Shoplifted: Every other day.
How do you want to Die: Vampire.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: A kid again.
What country would you most like to Visit: Australia.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Ewww...I'm not looking at boys and girls...give me some damned WOMEN!!!
Favourite Hair Color: Mine.
Short or Long Hair: Does it matter?
Height: There was this girl in high school...I swear to God, she was three feet tall...PERFECT height!
Weight: How much do "D" size tits weigh?
Best Clothing Style: Style is for chumps who can't make up their own mind what to fucking wear.
Number of Drugs I have taken: At least 4...damned flashbacks.
Number of CDs I own: Too many.
Number of Piercings: I once had my lip pierced...
Number of Tattoos: None yet.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Everyday...
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
Death through freak supernatural incident
You are going to die in a freak vampire/werewolf incident. I would start carrying garlic and silver bullets if I were you. There is something weird about your demeanor, and evil is attracted to you. Plus you may be a little attracted to evil too.
Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com
Fighting Child Protective Services False Accusations

My Interests

Making money. Playing guitar. Video games. My daughter's imagination.

That which sickens you only makes me stronger.

Here's one of those WTF? kinda moments for you. Just remember kids: Japanese people are your friend. They make beautiful things like this.

Let the games...BEGIN!

Just some general information...
--------------------------------
666
The number of the Beast

664
The Neighbor of The beast

667
The neighbor across the street from the Beast

660
Estimated number of the Beast

666-66-6666
SSN of the Beast

666.0666
The number of the High-Performance Beast

0.666
Number of the milliBeast

1/666
The Denominator of the Beast

666[-/(-1)]
The Imaginary Number of the Beast

1010011010
The Binary Number of the Beast

29A
The Hexidecimal Number of the Beast

1-666
The Area Code of the Beast

60666
The Zip Code of the Beast (somewhere in Chicago)

1-900-666-6666
The Psychic Beast ($6.66 for 666 seconds - over 18, please)

$666.00
MSRP of the Beast

$726.66
The price, including sales tax, delivered

$10, 666.95
Price, with leather, sun-roof, and radials

$566.69
The Wal-mart price of the Beast

Phillips 666
The gas the Beast runs best on

Route 666
The road the Beast likes best

666ÂºF
The temperature at which to roast Beast

666 k
Retirement plan of the Beast

666 mg
Minimum Daily Required dosage of Beast

6.66%
Annual Percentage Rate on a mortgage from First Beast Bank

DSM-666(r)
Diagnostic and Statistics Manual of the Beast (revised)

Lotus 6-6-6
Spreadsheet of the Beast

DOS 6.66
Operating system of the Beast

i68666
CPU of the Beast

666tii
BMW of the Beast

I'm so going to Hell for this...BUT WHO CARES!!!

Jesus is really Hitler! Don't believe me? Check this dumbass shit out...
Jesus Is Hitler

I'd like to meet:

Top 5 Dead or Living:

1. James Hetfield
2. Dimebag Darrell
3. David Gilmour
4. Stephen Hawkings
5. Matt Groening

Music:

I don't care, just make it LOUD!!!

Movies:

Classic horror. None of this new Hollywood fluff that they keep cramming down our throats. Oh, and I'm a sucker for cheesy '80s flicks.

Television:

Don't watch TV anymore. Too real.

Books:

Stephen King, Tom Clancy, comics, X-Men, G.I. Joe, Transformers, any damned thing I can read while I'm taking a dump.
Some points must be made...
Orwell had it right all along...
A spokesman for the Senate Armed Services chairman says draft legislation is headed to Capitol Hill with "new language," for a proposal that would allow the CIA to continue alternative interrogation techniques on suspected terrorists.
CNN
Senate aide: White House changing its CIA interrogation bill
September 19, 2006
In our time, political speech and writing are largely the defense of the indefensible . . . Thus political language has to consist largely of euphemism, question-begging and sheer cloudy vagueness. Defenseless villages are bombarded from the air, the inhabitants driven out into the countryside, the cattle machine-gunned, the huts set on fire with incendiary bullets: this is called pacification. Millions of peasants are robbed of their farms and sent trudging along the roads with no more than they can carry: this is called transfer of population or rectification of frontiers. People are imprisoned for years without trial, or shot in the back of the neck or sent to die of scurvy in Arctic lumber camps: this is called elimination of unreliable elements. Such phraseology is needed if one wants to name things without calling up mental pictures of them.
George Orwell
Politics and the English Language
1946
____________________
Some of the changes in the Middle East are happening gradually, but they are real . . . Citizens have voted in municipal elections in Saudi Arabia, in parliamentary elections in Jordan and Bahrain, and in multiparty presidential elections in Yemen and Egypt . . . Every nation that travels the road to freedom moves at a different pace, and the democracies they build will reflect their own culture and traditions.
George W. Bush
Speech to the UN General Assembly
September 19, 2006
It is almost universally felt that when we call a country democratic we are praising it: consequently the defenders of every kind of regime claim that it is a democracy, and fear that they might have to stop using that word if it were tied down to any one meaning. Words of this kind are often used in a consciously dishonest way.
George Orwell
Politics and the English Language
1946
____________________
While civilized societies uphold justice, mercy, and the value of life, the terrorists hold to an ideology that feeds on the pain of others and glorifies murder and suicide. Though they plot and plan and operate by stealth, the terrorists make no secret of the beliefs they hold. They seek to impose a dictatorship of fear, under which every man, woman, and child would live in total obedience to a narrow and hateful ideology.
Dick Cheney
Speech to the National Automobile Dealers Association
September 19, 2006
When one watches some tired hack on the platform mechanically repeating the familiar phrases -- bestial atrocities, iron heel, bloodstained tyranny, free peoples of the world, stand shoulder to shoulder -- one often has a curious feeling that one is not watching a live human being but some kind of dummy . . . And this is not altogether fanciful. A speaker who uses that kind of phraseology has gone some distance toward turning himself into a machine.
George Orwell
Politics and the English Language
1946
____________________
PRESIDENT BUSH: It's been a pleasure to have a meaningful, strategic dialogue with Jacques Chirac. We talked about a lot of subjects . . . It was a very constructive and important dialogue.
PRESIDENT CHIRAC: Well, indeed, today we have discussed and evidenced the fact that we have common approaches and a common sense of the main issues that we discussed . . . And we, as a result of this, have once again confirmed that we are entirely on the same wave length -- we have the same approach to the different issues, which are of deep and grave concern to us, as they challenge and jeopardize peace in different parts of the world.
George W. Bush and Jacques Chirac
Press Conference
September 19, 2006
The great enemy of clear language is insincerity. When there is a gap between one's real and one's declared aims, one turns as it were instinctively to long words and exhausted idioms, like a cuttlefish spurting out ink.
George Orwell
Politics and the English Language
1946
____________________
Reasonable people can come to different conclusions about the extent of the rights that should be enjoyed by people believed to be among the most dangerous Islamofascist terrorists on the planet.
Frank Gaffney
Washington Times op ed
September 19, 2006
The word Fascism has now no meaning except in so far as it signifies "something not desirable."
George Orwell
Politics and the English Language
1946
____________________
We Are Seeing A Bright Future Begin To Take Root In The Broader Middle East.
White House
Fact sheet
September 19, 2006
All issues are political issues, and politics itself is a mass of lies, evasions, folly, hatred, and schizophrenia. When the general atmosphere is bad, language must suffer.
George Orwell
Politics and the English Language
1946

Heroes:

Anyone anywhere who has made music that has changed at least one life in this world. That and my daughter. She gives me meaning every day. Lord knows I need it anymore.

My Blog

Homicidal Necrophobe

A prison contains 16 cells in a square grid. No corridors. There are doors in each interior wall. (I.e., prison is like a 4x4 checkboard, with doors between horizontally connected and vertically conne...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Tue, 15 Apr 2008 09:12:00 PST

I couldn’t resist.

Guitars don't get pregnant.You can play your Guitar any time of the month.Guitars don't have parents.Guitars don't whine... unless you want them to.You can share your Guitar with your friends.Guitars ...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Mon, 14 Apr 2008 07:27:00 PST

Man, this shit has gone too far!

And no, I’m not talking about something else fucking up in my world and I’m not talking about other people’s dramas in town and I’m not talking about my relationship, either. I...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:45:00 PST

Tell me what you think.

So I totally stole this thing from someone else, but I figured I would see what happens. It’s a personality thing done by people that know you and not by yourself. It’s some weird thing wh...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Fri, 04 Apr 2008 12:08:00 PST

Things I am proud to have...

Just some random things I am glad I have in my life right now. I tend to have a whole mess of bullshit falling down around me lately that I just need to take some God-damned stock and find out what I ...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Sun, 30 Mar 2008 11:04:00 PST

Thanks for nothing again, 31.

So you decide to take more from me, eh, 31? I give you everything I have and you decide to bitch-slap me when I’m not looking and fuck my life up even more. We burn $108 to buy new tubes for my ...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Tue, 25 Mar 2008 11:08:00 PST

Knock it down...

New song. New mood. New feeling of "What The Fuck?" Check it out. "Clean My Wounds" - Corrosion of Conformity I see the world through blood-shot eyesStreets filled with blood from distant liesT...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Wed, 19 Mar 2008 08:45:00 PST

I’m on one of those random thought purges...

God, I feel old. I bought friggin’ "Monster Squad" today on DVD. I’ll give you a second to digest that one. ... Yeah, not a damned fool one of you know just what the fuck that is. It&rsquo...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Tue, 18 Mar 2008 12:50:00 PST

Thanks for nothing, 31.

I remember back in December, Amber and the kids had a saying: "2008 is going to be great." Yeah, right. I hate to be the pessimist here, but I am not having a good fucking year yet. The latest slam to...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Fri, 14 Mar 2008 10:39:00 PST

For all the guitar guys who know stuff...

For what this is worth...The bulletins aren't working for me at all, so I need a place to store this until they work again. Maybe someone will randomly read this here and can help me, too. Okay, the l...
Posted by Nicodemos Cain (Gimmick of the Apocalypse) on Sat, 08 Mar 2008 05:31:00 PST