The Dirty Blondes - ProfilesArchive

About Me

The Dirty Blondes combined age is exactly 100 years. They look good for their age.
The Dirty Blondes rhythm section is used to set metronomes in the 48 contiguous United States. Hawaii cannot afford the price and Alaska has no desirable resources to trade for this service.
In times of crisis, two of the most powerful nations have the ability to call upon the Dirty Blondes for help. If those two nations were to clash, The Blondes would be required by the arrangements of an ancient truce to destory both nations. As long the Blondes survive there will never be a war between the USA and Denmark.
Ran, vocalist for The Dirty Blondes, is more than a wicked awesome singing voice- he is also the 2nd most requested hostage negotiator for the Springfield Police Department, just after local feel good rockers Someone Still Loves You Boris Yetsin.
God reached his hand down from the sky, and God asked Timmy if he wanted to die- he said, "No, sir." So we're packing our things and we're building a boat; we're gonna create a new master race because we're so pure. Oh, we're so pure.
The 'I' in Ranald I. Cummings stands for "Incomprehensibleness", one of only four 20-letter words in English that starts with that letter.
The Dirty Blondes are shogunate vassals with orders to kill. Their swordsmanship is unmatched.

Myspace Backgrounds

My Interests

Music:

Member Since: 7/6/2004
Band Website: you are lookin at it" you are lookin at it
Band Members:

TIMMY MIANO (a.k.a "Angry Panda," "Sexual Harrassment Panda," "The Gambler") - Guitar/Vocals/Songwriting/Italianess

RANALD IVES (a.k.a. "The Dude," "The Dredd Pirate Roberts," "Remy McSwain") - Lead Vocals/debauchery/wicked sunglasses

BRIAN AZEVEDO (a.k.a. "Brian Von Awesome," "Bri-Bri," "The Cute One") - Bass/ Vocals/Actual Talent

PATRICK FALLWELL (a.k.a. "Boomstick," "The Furry One," "White Jesus") - Drums/Yelling/Backdoor sex

Formerly Blonde (and always will be):
JIMI SCHUCHMANN (a.k.a. " Jimi-too-fast," "Jimi Knuckles") - Drums/backing vocals/Taco Bueno/eternal awesomeness
Influences: The Misfits, The Pixies, The Hives, Neil Diamond, The Eagles of Death Metal, Mission of Burma, Mudhoney, The Sweet, The Donnas, Iggy and the Stooges, Johnny Cash, The B-52's, The Violent Femmes, Kiss, The Queers, Walnut Street Gang, The Dead Milkmen, The Dead Kennedys, The Toy Dolls, Tennessee Ernie Ford, and of course The Wu-Tang Clan

Sounds Like:

It's kind of like a Butthole Surfers meets Canned Heat at Joe Strummer's gravesite thing (rock face!).

Record Label: Mono Americano
Type of Label: Indie

My Blog

So you said you wanted more...

....then more you shall have! This SATURDAY night, we the Blondes do it for you ALL NIGHT LONG! That's right, enough Blonde-ness to make even the most hardcore holdout s...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Thu, 12 Jun 2008 12:37:00 PST

To all who were a part of the Extravaganza...

.....be you audience, entertainers, crew, bartenders, staff: an enourmous thanks to you all which I cannot possibly express enough. Last night was a success beyond all m...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Mon, 02 Jun 2008 10:18:00 PST

The biggest damn show of the year....

It's theDIRTY BLONDES "I'M NOT SORRY" ALBUM RELEASE EXTRAVAGANZA!9:30pmSATURDAY, MAY 31st@ THE OUTLAND$5 cover$10 cover/CDBy now you all know that this Saturday @ The Outland will be the night to end ...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Tue, 27 May 2008 08:49:00 PST

Saturday, May 31st!!!

That's the deadly date. The Momentous moment you must moan for: SATURDAY, MAY 31st is the Dirty Blondes ALBUM RELEASE EXTRAVAGANZA!!! We've got twelve - count 'em - TWELVE BANDS, special g...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Tue, 20 May 2008 09:46:00 PST

Sending ’em off in style...

Our fine bretheren (sister-en?) The Adrenals are embarking on a THREE MONTH tour this week and asked us if we would help send them off in style. When two lovely ladies (and two fine gentlemen) a...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:59:00 PST

The Blondes return to the Pub - Saturday Night!

You asked for it, you got it! (no really, people asked) We're headed back to the Patton Alley Pub THIS SATURDAY NIGHT with our good friends Jalopy for a fine-ass evening of fine-...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Fri, 07 Mar 2008 08:42:00 PST

We need your help - THIS SATURDAY NIGHT!

The Dirty Blondes have entered into a contest with seemingly insurmountable odds. That is, seemingly insurmountable if we were anyone else! We're playing in the Loyal Family Talent Search ...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Wed, 20 Feb 2008 01:33:00 PST

Good weekend behind, good weekend ahead...

Patton Alley was a roaring success, thank you to everyone who came out. For our first time there we could not have been happier. Much thanks to Jalopy, the Pub, and of course, Mikey Divine...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Mon, 04 Feb 2008 09:17:00 PST

New Music! New Drummer! Same old us.

That's right folks, the moment you've been waiting for is now finally here! We've got three new tracks from the album up ("I'm Not Sorry," "DIY," and "Spew") and man do they sound great!&nb...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:29:00 PST

Were Baaaaack! (Show Friday night!)

Well, Christmas, New Year's, Kwanzaa, Chaunnakuh, and the Blondes month off are all over! Writer's strike, sadly no. However, we remain unaffected as our banter is always 100% right off th...
Posted by The Dirty Blondes on Sun, 06 Jan 2008 10:51:00 PST