In compliance with the Freedom of Information Act, the following information is now available to the public: Wolfgang Lehmkuhl was born in St. Louis, Missouri in 1977. After being “misplaced†at the bottom of a hazardous waste container, he was miraculously saved by a janitor and returned – much to their chagrin – to the loving arms of his parents. Aside from brief sabbaticals in Texas, Chicago, and Japan he has lived there his whole life. He has successfully dodged all of the scholastic achievements, gainful employment, awards, and life-affirming experiences artists endure in order to spice up a biography such as this. In fact, it's highly probable that he's a dishonest megalomaniac who plagiarized this bio, filling in the appropriate information as it pertained to him, but only according to the alternate reality in which he resides in, thereby casting doubts on any and all information in this bio. In Wolfgang's quest for fame and fortune, he has held down several stimulating jobs such as; gas station clerk, cemetery groundskeeper, skip trace, night watchman at a cranberry silo, zombie hunter, freelance discount surgeon, and a professional mattress tester, to name just a few. Although still a willing accomplice in the vast right-wing corporate oil conspiracy, Wolfgang dreams of someday making billion dollar Bible epics, bathed in blood, carnage, and controversy. He likes pumpkin pie and sleeps with a stuffed crocodile named Snerve. Wolfgang is on Myspace to shamelessly promote his films, his hate mail inducing blogs, and to mingle with dangerous, artistic personalities. Wolfgang Lehmkuhl has directed two feature films – Cannibal & Surviving Dirk – and one comedic short – Reject This Film – honored at the St. Louis International Film Festival and the St. Louis Filmmaker's Showcase in 2005. He is currently finishing his first novel, and in pre-production on his third feature film, The Dead and the Dreaming. ~ BIOGRAPHY WRITTEN BY Neal Vorgest ~ (The Official Wolfgang Lehmkuhl Historian)
img src="http://img527.imageshack.us/img527/2938/compulsoryskinn
ttb2cq7.jpg"
