DETROIT BABEK

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I often climb abandoned buildings in Detroit.
I have checked into every hotel in Las Vegas , but have not seen the inside of a hotel room yet.
I carry a magnet in my pocket so I can demagnitize all video tapes , cassettes and credit cards I come in contact with.
I punched a police officer in acapualco after my friend urinated on him , we narrowly escaped after giving him $50.
I fried IBM's Deep Blue chess computer after beating it 109 times consecutively.
I competed in the 10 day primal challenge adventure race and finished in 4 days.
I built a rollercoaster in my neighborhood last summer , for the children.
I ate a plate full of wasabi on a dare.
I jump from moving vehicles on a regular basis.
I placed hallucinogens on my friends forehead while he slept.
I accidently puked on a crowd of people after sticking my head out the V.I.P. balcony at a nightclub in cancun.
I read the dictionary to pass time.
I am really a robot.
I disassembled my entire automobile and reassembled it , just to see if I could.
I crashed into a McDonalds after my brakes failed on my vehicle.
I am addicted to E-bay.
I was the subject of a HBO documentary.
I eat 17,000 calories a day.
I swam across the Detroit River in an attept to flee from the canadian border patrol.
I have been offered $2000 for my shirt and turned it down.
I am addicted to MySpace.
I make love to women for hours on end , needing only their climax to be satisfied.
I am writing a movie script based on a very intresting 2 hours of my life.
I visit my friends by breaking into their homes and waiting for them to get there.
I play arcade games for hours using only a quarter.
I destroyed my roommates television using a circular saw.
I was scouted by the Detroit Pistons.
I dance on the bar and hang from the lighting fixtures when I'm at the club.
I am 5' 9'' and caucasian , yet I can dunk a basketball with authority.
I hurl musical instruments, appliances and furniture out windows with deadly accuracy.
I sleep once a week and when I do sleep I do so standing up.
I can jump , hop , and skip all at once because the laws of physics do not apply to me.
I enjoy going on trips with my friends to outerspace in my space shuttle.
I race stolen golf carts down Woodward.
I have performed numerous breast augmentations.
I used both the laws of relativity and quantum physics to explain black holes , neither have worked.
I butt-sled down the peak of Mt. Everest.
I test drive European sports cars on the Autobahn.
I started an internationally recognized clothing line , on a whim , in my friends basement.