EB profile picture

EB

Im BIG in Baker

About Me

I move more then a paranoid Gypsy. I'm what you call a comedian. Being a comedian basically means eat shit and die until you make it mainstream. I love my job and i wouldnt trade it for the best coke in the world. I suck at keeping my schedule up on myspace (but im working on it) because im too busy checking all the web cam whores that want to be my friends. i cant blame them though since im whoring myself out too. I am working on getting my website up and getting more video clips up too. For all that are still asking for the DVD and or the Evil Bastard sweater. calm down its not that good but if you still want it to support my drinking habits and gas money so i can drive to your town to do some comedy shows then you will be able to order it off the website soon (leave name of local drug dealer with paypal). If you have never seen me before, take a chance and come out to one of my shows if i come to your town.

NOW available NEW DVD " Stomach This Bitch"

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

It could be you, talk to me. I'll let you know afterwards.
and of course the great Tom Waits

Music:

Tom Waits, Robert Johnson, Cake, Deftones, Daniel Lioneye, Gogol Bord, Turbonegro, norma jean, marlyn manson, DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince, DJ KOOL, TOOL, Nine Inch Nails, Tenaciouse D, Michael Jackson, Linkin Park, Aquabats, Zebrahead, Metallica, Pantera, DamagePlan, Converge, The list just goes on and on...

Movies:

Greatest movie ever made " Wet Hot American Summer" i have watched it way to many times, but damn that shits good. Office space, From Dusk till Dawn, Back to the futur, and Goodfellas, cant forget about goodfellas.

Television:

Futurama is officially in my top 5 all time greatest TV shows i think reno 911 is making a place in my heart too, but only because its the guys/girl from " The State" and that was a great show.

Books:

reading is for people without ADD i have only read "Ellen DeGeneres, My point and i do have one" it was funny.

Heroes:

i dont have many heroes, in fact i cant think of a single one right now. i do respect and look up to some people for what they do... but they are not my "Heroes"

My Blog

The Rat Pack

So Britney Spears' Performance at the VMAs made me realize how much i hate all these whores that are famous for bullshit. Its like Paris, Britney, Lindsey, ect. all got together one day and thought "....
Posted by EB on Wed, 12 Sep 2007 11:06:00 PST

The word On The Street

after getting into a discussion with one of my friends about religion and cults we ended up talking about scientology. realizing we both did not know enough facts about this so called "religion" to ba...
Posted by EB on Mon, 27 Aug 2007 10:34:00 PST

where you at Florida

As i sit at the computer watching Furturama getting drunker and drunker as we speak i realize that it has been a while since i posted a new blog. And as i sit here deciding that this is a good time to...
Posted by EB on Sun, 26 Aug 2007 08:35:00 PST

pop it like its hot

I'm am sick and tired of seeing all these little gangsta wannabe "playas"  running around downtown with your cool pop collar and that bad ass little side turn on your hat. Your all fucking retard...
Posted by EB on Tue, 10 Apr 2007 01:34:00 PST

Hey Doc, go fuck yourself!

So here is the scoop. i am sick, very sick. i have had a cold for about a month now but, the last 4 days have been shit. I am coughing very hard and not like a flemmy caugh (that already past) but a v...
Posted by EB on Sun, 11 Mar 2007 01:56:00 PST

Fingerbang

im bringing back Fingerbang. i feel that it is a term not used enough. I would like to here the people (you) stand up and be proud of who you are and god damnit start saying fingerbang. it works very ...
Posted by EB on Tue, 20 Feb 2007 08:01:00 PST

The bastard that made it to the top

i have recently met a person who has become a very good friend of mine in the past couple months. I have played many games of beer pong with him and we dont get beat. its because we are the basta...
Posted by EB on Tue, 06 Feb 2007 06:33:00 PST

Whats my name?

Mutha Fucking EB Bitches!Thats right it is possible for me to be more cockey.
Posted by EB on Mon, 29 Jan 2007 01:46:00 PST

Last Laugh

Buffalo Club LAST LAUGH! When you ask: 9:00PM How much you ask: Free mutha fucka, i am giving away every ticket! Whats in it for me you ask: Drink specials that make you smile, comics that make you l...
Posted by EB on Sat, 20 Jan 2007 11:49:00 PST

what it is bitches

Has anyone seen my liver, i left it downtown yesterday, it fell out. if you have it please return it. it is dead so it wont do you any good. i just want it back so i can remeber the good times i've ha...
Posted by EB on Thu, 18 Jan 2007 10:54:00 PST