Mitch

Please buy a copy of my award-winning sexual manifesto PISSING ON THE PULSE OF THE PLANET by sending $12 to my PayPal account [email protected]
PISSING ON THE PULSE OF THE PLANET is a book that unmasks the sexual face of bedroom behavior with subversive fun and an odyssey of witty and blunt observations.
Brimming with controversy and exquisite insight, it’s a hybrid of Jerry Seinfeld’s SEINLANGUAGE, Drew Carey’s DIRTY JOKES AND BEER, and George Carlin's BRAINDROPPINGS.
Like a literary snake, I shed my endearing skin, put a bomb up the ass of creation, and lay myself on the operating table.
What happens is a compilation of candid and revealing takes on sex, politics, and pop culture.
Some are sexual classics like NATION OF URINATION or ANIMATION MASTURBATION. Others are societal commentaries like FOUR WEDDINGS AND A DILDO and SODOMIZING THE DICTIONARY.
The days of young radical writers has long past. There’s no present-day Jack Kerouac, Hunter Thompson, Henry Miller, or William Burroughs. Instead we’re bombarded by straight-shooting, commercial authors like John Grisham, Michael Crichton, and Danielle Steele.
I’m launching a new literary wave of shock journalism.
Why should people read Mitch Mitchell?
He’s easily amused. “The whole concept of breast-feeding astounds me. After giving birth, a woman’s mammary glands swell up with the same liquid that I use in my Frosted Flakes.”
He’s sensitive to others. “My girlfriend thinks oral sex is fattening. So I stopped dipping my balls in Olive Oil before she went down on me. I use fat-free salad dressing now.”
He has good ideas. “God should have put the clitoris right in the vagina. It’s really too hard to find that little miniature penis.”
And he says what he wants. “I thought all homosexuals had season tickets to cock-fights. Then I found out it was just two roosters killing each other.”
SUMMARY
It was Susan Sontag that noted: “Perversity is the muse of modern literature.” From pleasuring yourself to Disney’s The Little Mermaid to flagrant penis envy through erection affection to the sticky floors of bathroom humor, PISSING ON THE PULSE OF THE PLANET serves up steaming passages that tickle you between that spot between your privates and your butt.
It’s intended as an enjoyment, a browser’s delight, to be dipped into, discussed, and perused as an entertainment, not substituted as a blow-up doll and dry-humped until God comes back.
Support the shit-house poet!