Here's how it all began. A few months ago, I was sitting as usual at my keyboard doing my nightly ritual of denying the dozen or so floozies who had asked for my MySpace friendship that evening. As you undoubtedly know, I am not all that irresistable. But, if you list yourself as single, 61 years old, and bisexual; you might just as well paint a bullseye on your forehead (or your wallet.) Every night they turn up -- every night I delete them. Same thing, over and over, night after night. Until. I was sitting denying the unlovely Noelle and just as I hit the "deny" button, the screen screamed (in red) ERROR! ERROR! I stared in horror. Everythng was gone. My whole MySpace had disappeared and nothing I could do would bring it back. I cried. I trembled. I looked around uselessly for the help that was not there. I was alone. All alone in my spartan room. No apple-cheeked boys, no sultry vixens, no unfaded silent movie queens (no queens at all!), no rock bands, no drummers (!), no food, no drugs, no useless office equipment, no cartoon heroes. All 2000+ of my friends, my support group, had vanished. Taken from me by what I asumed was a vengeful Tom. What had I done. The nightmare was real. The paranoia palpable!
The next day I skulked to a computer cafe (where other outcasts hover over anonymous rented machines) and I stealthily created a new identity. A new space. Then, ever-so-quietly, I tried to contact my old self -- and I was still there! Hooray! There were my friends, my saved messages, my favorites (you know who you are) -- but for how long? My own laptop would not access that page. Tom or Noelle (or maybe Tom and Noelle) had done something. Fortunately, calmer heads prevailed and I was told of the "genius bar" where you can go and they will fix things.
And they did fix things. But in the interim, I created the delightful new personality you now see. Originally, the other Leee created me to avoid the unsolicited advances of "the ladies." He unwisely lists himself as "bisexual' (based on very flimsy evidence), when he is, in fact, flamboyantly homosexual in his manner of dress and behavior -- given to an embarrassingly overt tendency toward too much of everything in dress, make-up, and costume jewelry. Despite this, he is nightly inundated with friend requests from shady characters who either like a challenge or smell a sucker.
And so, I was invented. Eccentric, sarcastic, darkly disturbed, and unacceptable in any form of civilized society. Of course, I have taken quite a fancy to my new self and intend to stay around. Having two personalities is a great tension reliever (not to mention occasional sex partner).
Many of you have become friends with both of me which is great fun and gives me hope for a bright future. Feel free to pursue relationships with both of me. Hopefully, you will find it diverting to be able to relate to whichever personality is best equipped for whatever particular whim, idea, or foible you are currently entertaining. In fact, getting both opinions may prove even more fruitful, as is currently popular in medical circles. Speaking for my other personality and myself, we are delighted with your open-minded response to our clear need for endless attention and affection. Kindly keep it coming. And yes, of course, none of this has discouraged the "ladies" who now invite both of my personalities to examine the delights of their forbidden photos.
And, yes, BOTH twins have the "Toni."
Evil twin created by stevenarts, check out his fantastic page!
Myspace Layouts at Pimp-My-Profile.com / Sparkling stars - Image Hosting
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