Spitz-n-Swallows

The story of Markus Spitz and Wlademier Swallows dates back to the late 1960's. Markus, born to Nikolai and Inga Spitz, was traded, at the age of 7, to the Swallows family for 3 chickens and a sack of wheat. Valentin and Rozaliya Swallows were mere peasants and obsessed with American Culture. Once the trade of Markus and the chickens was completed, Markus and Wlademier were inseparable. Once puberty set in, Spitz and Swallows began dabbling in many different sports such as Weasel tossing and hula hooping. But one sport always came naturally to them, Basketball. At the age of 13, the boys joined the Russian Olympic team and led them to 8 straight golds. At this time they knew that something else needed to be done. Thats when Spitz and Swallows packed up their belongings and moved to the United States where their skills on AND off the court, have captured the hearts of millions.